Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Agency Culture, Attitude & Aptitude, Authenticity, Comment, Contribution, Creativity, Culture, Details, Pretentious Rubbish, Process, Professionalism, Reputation, Respect, Systems
Over the years, I’ve had people call me ‘unprofessional’.
Never for the work I produced, but for how I have approached the work.
Whether it’s the way I’ve dressed.
Whether it’s the way I’ve proved a point.
Whether it’s the way I’ve asked a question.
Whether it’s the way I’ve countered an objection.
I should point out this never came from people you would think could take exception to it.
Over the years I’ve found myself in the ridiculous situation of presenting to – and working with – some of the World’s toughest and best CEO’s and CMO’s, be it Richard Branson, François-Henri Pinault, Phil Knight, Elizabeth Warren, Myley Cyrus or even James Hetfield.
And not one of them had an issue with me. Not one.
If truth be told, I think they quite liked the fact I was ‘me’ … to the point I presented to Phil Knight wearing Birkenstocks and then I was sent some Nike’s that had been adapted into a ‘birkie’ for me. [which I sadly lost in one of our country moves]
No, the people who labelled me as unprofessional were almost universally ‘middle-men’ … people who thought their position in a company meant they could dictate how people acted, not just presented.
[The exception to this was Anthony Kiedis of RHCP fame, but as I have documented many times – given how much of a prick he is universally acknowledged to be, I take that as a badge-of-honour rather than a personal slight. Plus the others in the band were lovely]
Anyway, the point of this whole rant is that it seems professionalism is becoming more and more about appearance and process adherence than the standard of the work and the rigor that went into it.
Don’t get me wrong, ‘presentation and process’ has a role to play … but when the people who are the most focused on it tend to be the people who’ve never made anything significant with it, you start to think they maybe use professionalism as a label to hide behind rather than a standard of work to live up to.
But here’s the other irony …
Often the companies who claim to bang on about ‘professional standards’ the most, are the ones with the most questionable behaviors.
And while that could lead me to talk about companies like McKinsey …
Or the financial institutions and their complicit, self-serving actions relating to the Sub Prime Mortgage bullshit …
I thought I’d highlight something else …
This.
Seriously Linkedin, why – of all the images you could have created to represent ‘a new job’ – did you choose this?
It makes Google’s logo look like it was designed by Picasso, rather than – arguably – Stevie Wonder.
But at least Google’s has charm and charisma. And represented who they [once] were …
But this?
What the fuck does this represent?
I’ll tell you … a company who loves to talk about professionalism but increasingly behaves in ways that are the antithesis of it.
A dumbing down of standards and behaviors in an attempt to gain increased popularity.
Hell, even Microsoft’s ‘Mr Clippy’ is arguably less offensive given that had an alleged degree of usefulness associated with it.
Empashsis on the word ‘alleged’.
Which is why if anyone ever questions your professionalism in the future, reply with “you’re welcome”, because you’re not only likely doing something right, you’re doing something they never could or that anyone in their right mind would ever aspire to.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Age, Attitude & Aptitude, Curiosity, Distinction, Insight, Planners, Planners Making A Complete Tit Of Themselves And Bless, Planning, Point Of View, Pretentious Rubbish, Relevance, Resonance
One of the things I hate about planning is the quest for intellectual superiority.
Of course, not everyone is like that … but there’s a hell of a lot who are.
Wielding their smarts like a sword, without realizing that it is rarely as sharp or dangerous as they think. Or hope.
It’s why I also find those who bang on about planning being all about ‘curiosity’ laughable. To imply that’s a trait solely owned by those of the strategic community is egotism at its best.
Sure, there are some truly brilliant thinkers in our industry, but more often than not, we’re surrounded by a bunch of loud duplicators.
And there would be nothing wrong with that if these people admitted their declarations came from – or were influenced by – others. But in a world where everyone wants to position themselves as the brightest, sharpest mind – more often than not, we hear history being restated with just a more modern, confident voice.
Of course we all do it to a certain extent – I know I will have – but the realty is I find the most interesting perspectives coming from people outside of adland rather than in. That does not mean there are not good things being said within our industry, it’s just they all tend to follow whatever theme is cool at the time, so – for me at least – it all gets a bit boring.
Which is all my way of saying how much I enjoy hearing or reading the ‘insights’ of people form outside our bubble. Sure, some can be utterly farcical. And some may be doing the same repackaging as I’ve just complained about. But occasionally you come across something so sharp that you find yourself asking ‘when was the last time you read something so brilliantly stated from your peers’.
That happened to me recently with this before/after photo of Mickey Rourke.

No, I don’t mean the photo.
Nor do I mean the judgmental question being asked of the images.
I mean the comment underneath it all.
“When we’re born, we look like our parents. When we die, we look like our decisions.”
Fuck me, that’s good.
So good that it’s changed the way I look at people and aging.
Hell, it’s even given me a fresh way to talk to my clients about their past choices and decisions.
I rarely get that from the observations, declarations or ‘insights’ from my industry.
Of course there are some who are phenomenal, but sadly too many planners aspire to be seen as ‘smart’, without realizing the real value is when you are clever.
Just ask Lucille Ball.
Filed under: 2024, A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Agency Culture, Apathy, Attitude & Aptitude, Authenticity, Brand Suicide, Brands, Communication Strategy, Complicity, Confidence, Consultants, Context, Contribution, Corporate Gaslighting, Crap Marketing Ideas From History!, Creative Brief, Creative Development, Creativity, Culture, Delusion, Differentiation, Distinction, Effectiveness, Egovertising, End of Year, Experience, Fake Attitude, Honesty, Influencers, Leadership, Management, Marketing, Marketing Fail, Mediocrity, Only In Adland, Perspective, Planners, Planning, Point Of View, Positioning, Pretentious Rubbish, Professionalism, Provocative, Purpose, Relevance, Reputation, Research, Resonance, Respect, Ridiculous, Standards, Status, Status Anxiety, Strategy, Stubborness, Stupid, Success, Talent, Toxic Positivity, Truth
As tomorrow is one of those terribly indulgent ‘thank you and goodbye to ’24 post’ [the blog equivalent of boring someone with ‘what they dreamed about last night’], I thought today should be a RobMegaRant™ post … ending the year as I hope to start next year, hahaha.
So with that, take a look at this bloody amazing picture.

How awesome is it?
I have absolutely no idea where it’s from or when it’s from but I can’t stop looking at it.
The browns.
The clothes.
And then – of course – the egg salad machine.
You can imagine that at the time, this was a demonstration of innovation.
Of technological advancement.
Of commercial optimisation.
A glimpse into an automated world of high efficiency and effectiveness.
Removing barriers and friction to provide audiences with consistent, satisfying results.
Except it wasn’t was it?
Not in the long-term … and most likely not in the short-term either.
Oh sure, there’s machines that make industrial amounts of egg salad to shove in cheap and cheerful sandwiches you get at the local petrol station … but in 54 years of being on – and around – this planet, I’ve never once seen any ‘public egg salad maker/dispensers’.
Not even in Japan.
And that’s because it’s a shit idea, for a shit-ton of reasons.
Taste.
Quality.
Consistency.
Health and safety.
The fact no one wants egg salad every single day of their life.
And that’s before we even get to issues such as ‘appetite appeal’.
Looking at the picture and you can’t help but wonder, “what the fuck were they thinking”?
Except our industry does a similar thing ALL. THE. TIME.
An endless production line of ‘proprietary’ systems, processes, models and formats … promising the world and promoted using almost identical language and benefits that was likely used for that bloody egg volcano machine.
Innovation.
Automation.
Optimisation.
Advancement.
Transformation.
Effectiveness.
Efficiency.
Put aside that in most cases, the only ‘proprietary’ element is the name that’s been given to it.
Put aside that in many cases, the people behind it have never created something of disproportionate value and impact.
Put aside that the vast majority of these ‘innovations’ are more about not being left behind rather than moving you forward. [Read: marketing transformation]
Put aside that in many cases, the real purpose of the product is to reinforce the ego – and/or bank account – of the person claiming to have all the answers.
Put aside that many of the companies who flock to it tend to be those who choose to abdicate and outsource their responsibility for decisions and choices.
Don’t get me wrong, there are some really good innovations in our industry. There are also far too many people who dismiss change simply because they don’t like it. And we cannot forget that we unfairly expect new ideas to deliver the results of established ideas.
However, when certain parties peddle their products, tools, services, models, formats with the attitude of it not just being the right way, but ‘the only way’ – where they guarantee success regardless of category, country or spend – then frankly, not only should we see their declarations as an admission of [at best] blinkered thinking or [at worst] evidence of being a chancer and/or hustler … we should be asking ourselves why the fuck are we blindly trusting the self-serving voice and opinion of those whose only major commercial achievement is elevating their own name and image.
I am over efficiency and optimisation being peddled as innovation and progress.
I am over process being regarded as more important than output.
I am over loose association being reframed as expertise.
I am over easy being more valued than quality.
I am over people thinking being good in one thing means they’re excellent in all things.
We need to stop thinking of insurance salesmen as pioneers.
Sure, the good ones have a role to play – especially when companies are downgrading training for their employees – but it’s not as a leader of marketing/brand/creative innovation. Even more so when the reality is many are either riding on the efforts and achievements of someone else or simply communicating the 101 of particular disciplines under the guise of it being at the highest academic standard.
Forgive me for my skepticism, but even if it was true – which it isn’t – I don’t see many universities achieving cultural status and influence through their marketing approach. Hell, most universities don’t even know how to differentiate themselves from each other.
Please don’t read this as being anti-education. God no.
The reality is the industry needs more teachers. Or should I say better ones.
Not the self-appointed guru’s who peddle their self-serving blinkered services for profit, but those who have been there and done that. Who have consistently done things at a standard that goes way beyond just basic levels of achievement. Who can talk from the perspective of being at the coalface, not from a pedestal. Watching on with their binoculars. We need to celebrate those with actual experience, not just assoicated opinions.
Or said another way, we need chefs not egg salad salesmen.
Lets hope in 2025, we get back to valuing the ingredients, not just the convenience.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Attitude & Aptitude, Authenticity, Cannes, Comment, Consultants, Craft, Creative Brief, Creative Development, Creativity, Differentiation, Martin Weigel, Paula, Planners, Planners Making A Complete Tit Of Themselves And Bless, Planning, Point Of View, Pretentious Rubbish, Relevance, Research, Resonance, Respect
There are a lot of quotes out on social media that explains how to make great creative work. Hell, a bunch of them are probably mine.
But putting aside the fact many of the quotes originate from people who, arguably, haven’t done much work that is deserving of that description – all of them, in their own way, are right.
And that’s great, because the survival of this industry is down to making work that is great and achieves great things for those it’s for.
But the problem with those quotes is they often reflect an unrealistic World.
One where time … or budget … or client mandatories don’t matter.
Which is why this quote from Leonard Bernstein is so good.
Because it captures how to get to great in the real World.
We need more of this.
I think people want more of this.
Because not only is there a distinct lack of training in our industry at the moment – and what is there is often from the same outsourced ‘gurus’ everyone else is outsourcing to – but Fergus, from OnStrategy, told Paula, Martin and I how so many young planners outside of the ‘big cities’ end up thinking they have no chance to make something even good, as they lack the tools, processes and infrastructure to do what the people on his show said they did.
It’s why we ensured in our Cannes talk we put 3 practical pieces of advice that anyone could use … because if we want to change the standards, we need everyone to have the ability to do that, not just the privileged big city types.
Which is why I leave you with this.
Because as much as time can help craft, a lack of it can force audacious leaps.


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Yes, it’s Friday.
And yes, it’s the first of May.
But neither of those things are as incredible as this …
You see, on Sunday, it will be 20 years since I started this blog.
TWENTY BLOODY YEARS!
That’s before the iPhone.
And Android.
And Facebook.
And the Kindle.
And the financial crisis.
And before Pluto lost its planet creds.
AND BEFORE WI-FI WAS PUBLICLY AVAILABLE … so a very long time ago.
I still remember why I started it …
It wasn’t for any attempt for notoriety or popularity, it was more to do with survival.
You see I’d got a job that – frankly – I was woefully under-qualified for, and because it demanded so much of my time and energy to make sure I didn’t completely fuck it up, I needed an outlet for all the ideas and thoughts that were going around my head that I just didn’t feel were right for what I needed to do at that time.
Not because I was sure I was going to use them later … more because I needed to feel I was still connected to the stuff I loved while also believing that if I didn’t find a way to get them out of my head, they’d maybe be no more space left for anything new to enter my head.
And so this blog was born.
Reading through the first few posts not only reveals the times we were living in, but also the headspace I was in.
Trying to balance making sense of stuff happening around me while also needing an outlet for stuff I was feeling or thinking … which, in many ways, set the tone for how this blog has been for over 2 decades.
Which George recently described as, “the blog version of TK Maxx”.
He’s not wrong … and in some ways, I really like that.
Sure, among the almost 5000 posts I’ve written, there’s a lot of [to keep the TK Maxx analogy going] cheap and nasty shit in there … but there’s also a few ‘designer label’ gems hidden amongst it all.
At least for me.
Stuff that made me think, challenge or question stuff in ways that I had not imagined or considered before.
Stuff that ended up impacting how I did things and how I still do things.
Stuff that forced me to articulate what I believe, not just what I feel.
Maybe those posts meant nothing to anyone but me. Hell, maybe no one even read them. But while every post I’ve written reflects something about who I was – or am – those ‘self-defined gems’ have a special place in my heart because they represent a moment where I felt I was growing and learning.
It’s why I always enjoyed the comment section, because for all the overwhelming piss-taking I received, the vast majority always ‘encouraged’ me to look deeper, wider or longer at issues I’d written about. And I loved that. I loved how the people who commented always kept me on my toes … which is why one of the unexpected pleasures of writing this blog for so long has been seeing how my opinion on certain subjects has changed or evolved over the years. It’s served as a great reminder about the importance of always exposing yourself to others perspectives, opinions, experiences and standards, even if the goal of it is simply to be really sure about what you think or believe.
In many ways, that’s the biggest surprise of 20 years writing this blog.
I never expected anyone to comment on anything I wrote, because I started it just for me.
A private place to express my thoughts and idiocy.
But then Andy discovered it and he sent an email to everyone at Cynic and some of our clients announcing it and then the mayhem started.
At that point, blogging had become a big thing. A good thing. A community of people who wanted to help and contribute to what others were doing. A lot of this was down to the great Russell Davies and his iconic blog … a place that not only brought people from all over the world together, but inspired others to start writing their own as well.
It was a place that not only exposed me to a lot of brilliant people I’d never have known about without his blog – people like Gareth Kay, Paul Colman, Northern Planner, Rob Mortimer, Marcus, John Dodds, Lauren, Age to name but a few – it also brought people to my blog who helped add to the texture, lessons and perspectives I was writing about.
I will forever be grateful to Russell for that … especially as most of the people he inadvertently introduced me to, not only still exist in my life but I have met them all IN THE FLESH.
Alas the blogging community, like most things in life, has moved on with maybe only Martin and I still churning stuff out via that platform. [Well, he curates, I churn] And while technologies advances allows strategists to be even more connected in even more ways, the energy of the community is not the same as it was back in the early days of blogging.
Now it feels more aggressive.
More sharp elbows and self publicizing.
Wanting the spotlight on them rather than the work they do.
But then, the industry seems to value those who talk about the work more than those who actually make it … which kind-of highlights why the industry is in the state it finds itself in but refuses to acknowledge.
Emperor’s New Clothes anyone?!
Screenshot
That this blog is 20 years old blows my mind. I never thought it would last that long, mainly because I never gave much thought about how long I’d be writing the thing. It’s not always been fun – when I was receiving a lot of anonymous hate that resulted in me deciding to stop allowing comments was definitely a low point – but all in all, the whole experience has been pretty glorious.
In many ways, this is one of the longest committed relationships I’ve ever had.
And one of the most successful, hahaha.
The fact there are some people who have been reading it for almost as long as I have been writing it, is madness.
Have they no taste?
Have they got nothing better to do?
Or maybe they’re stuck in prison and this is part of their ‘sentence’.
The good news for them is there’s no way this will still be a ‘going concern’ in another 20 years … at least not in terms of how regular I’ve been writing posts for the past 2 decades. Not because I am running out of things to say [albeit Andy said I have only ever written 3 posts and just keep re-writing them in different ways] but because I’ll be – hopefully – doing other things with my life.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ll always be grateful to advertising … it has given me a life I never could have dared to imagine … but I am increasingly spending more and more of my time working and collaborating with artists and I feel that’s where my future may be. Not because I don’t love what I do, but because I find their definition and expression of creativity even more interesting, challenging, open, provocative and progressive than where our industry is choosing to head.
But that’s not going to happen yet. Hell, it may not happen at all – I could get fired by all the artists tomorrow for all I know – which is why for the time being, I’ll keep happily juggling my two ‘lives’ while churning out daily blog posts at the same time.
Sorry, hahaha.
That said, the point of continuing this blog is different to what you may think and why I originally started it.
Because while it has helped me grow, learn, make new friends and even help build my professional reputation [which is hilarious when you read some of the stuff I’ve churned out, like this!] … it delivers something that is even more important to me.
Connection to my family.
I know … I know … that sounds weird-as-fuck, but what I mean is this:
A few years ago, Jill said that while she rarely ever reads my blog, when she does – she can hear my voice because of the way I write.
Put simply, how I write is how I talk … so when she reads my posts, it feels like I’m with her.
And she liked that.
Add to this that I’ve shared deeply personal and important moments in my life – from getting engaged to getting married, to Mum dying, to becoming a Dad, to getting Rosie – and Bonnie – to saying a tearful goodbye to Rosie, to moving from Singapore to HK to China to America to London to New Zealand [so far] … which means moving from cynic/WPP to Sunshine to Wieden+Kennedy to Deutsch to R/GA to Colenso [not to mention all the other highs and lows that have impacted or been introduced to my life over this period, be it death, covid, friends, family, health, books, chaos, and/or multitudes of weird, wild, crazy shit] … and this blog is no longer just a place where I rant rubbish, it’s a place my family can have me close even when I’m no longer here.
That means a lot to me.
Not because I want them to need me, but because I like knowing they can access me should they ever need me.
Or if Otis ever wants to introduce me to whoever becomes important in his life.
It’s why I’m going to keep writing it and why I’m going to move it to a free domain again, to make sure it always stay up … because what originally was a place just for me, has become a place that offers connection to the most important people to me.
And with that, I want to say a big thank you to everyone who has ever visited or commented.
Whether you meant it or not, you’ve given me far more than I ever imagined or hoped for.
Thank you. Love you. Grateful for you.