Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Agency Culture, Attitude & Aptitude, Colleagues, Corporate Evil, Corporate Gaslighting, Work
Back in Jan 2021, I wrote a post about the ridiculousness of ‘unlimited leave’ policies.
By that, I mean companies pretending they mean it when we all know that they would lose their shit if someone said they wanted 4 weeks off, let alone 4 months!
Which is why I found this post I saw on Twitter/X recently, so funny.
Because while it’s taking the piss, it’s also never been so serious in its life:
Filed under: 2026, Advertising, Cannes, Colenso, Colleagues, Communication Strategy, Creativity, Culture, Cunning, EvilGenius, London, Mischief, New Zealand, Si Vicars
The CCO of Colenso is Si Vicars.
I’ve waxed lyrical about him over the years.
His talent.
His overfamiliarity.
His evil genius bastardness.
His Chicken Parmesan abilities.
But one thing I’ve not talked about is his physique.
There’s many reasons for this.
It’s objectifying.
It’s an HR violation.
It’s not much to write home about.
Put simply, for all the talent that bursts out his body like an overload of steroids, his actual body resembles a twig.
I say this, despite the fact he’s some sort of martial artist master … even though he’s such a nice human, he’s more likely to drink tea with you than to karate chop the shit-out-of-you.
But maybe it’s the fact his hands are a dangerous weapon – and I don’t mean in terms of writing some Cannes Grand Prix idea – that on a recent trip to London, his hosts were confused with the person standing in-front of them. To the point one of them said TO HIS FACE:
“You don’t look like I thought you did. I thought you were ripped”.
To which another person in the room apparently looked up and said, “So did I”
And despite their rudeness legitimately allowing Si to snap their neck he, of course, did nothing and instead casually mentioned it to me on his return to NZ … while wondering out loud, where this rumour has come from.
Hmmmmmn, I wonder …
Happy Monday.
Filed under: 2026, A Bit Of Inspiration, Aspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Brand Suicide, Clients, Colenso, Collaboration, Colleagues, Comment, Communication Strategy, Corporate Evil, Creativity, Culture, Delusion, Emotion, Empathy, Equality, Harmony, Honesty, Hope, Inclusion, Management, Marketing, Marketing Fail, Relationships, Reputation, Resonance, Respect, Trust, Truth
Let’s be honest, when we want something we often show an ‘unnaturally good side’ of ourselves in an attempt to win someone over.
Doesn’t matter if it’s dating, business, or even getting someone to take out the bins … we are all capable of turning on our manipulation skills when it suits.
Nothing embodies this more than the agency pitch …
Where they bring out the most senior of senior leadership to the meetings …
Where they promise access to ‘the best of the best across the whole network’ …
Where they talk about developing specialised processes, systems and tools …
Where they discuss building a dedicated agency arm just for their service …
Where they say they’re open to new financial remuneration models and approaches …
And while I am in no way suggesting they’re lying about this, it rarely turns out like this.
There’s many reasons for that, of which one of them is prospective clients are also playing the same game …
Talking about the groundbreaking work they want …
Promising to provide good budgets, access and timelines …
Reinforcing how much they want a long-term partnership …
Championing the importance of debate and discussion …
Suggesting openness to new ways of working …
Again, not lying … but also not being entirely honest either.
If I’m being generous, a lot of this is because life and business is constantly changing and evolving so promised need to keep changing … however at the end of the day, the real problem isn’t that things change, it’s that we’re frightened of being transparent.
The irony of which is the greatest demonstration of respect – and arguably, the greatest way to build real trust – is being transparent.
By that I mean telling those around you, what is happening, when it’s happening.
Sure, I get there can be implications in doing that, but there’s far more if you delay speaking up …
It’s why I love Angela – Colenso’s CEO – attitude that ‘honesty trumps harmony’.
She’s right …
And while I appreciate it may not always be a comfortable conversation at the beginning … if you do it in a timely and transparent way, it always ends up being better than the alternative. That being people discovering the reality of the situation because of the disaster of the situation.
And yet so many still think that is a better way to deal with things … believing they can either overcome the situation or can hide the situation.
So why am I saying all this?
To be honest, I just wanted a way to justify posting these 2 photos because while the sum up the point of this post, the reality is they just made me piss myself laughing …
Because they’re true.
Oh so true.
The pitch …
The reality …
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Colleagues, Trust, Truth
I’m back. Again.
And while I’d love to talk about my time in NY, I can’t for a whole lot of reasons … one of them being that I don’t want to incite my family, friends and colleagues into giving me even more shit than they already are, for the poncy and pampered experience I’ve just had.
Again.
For what it’s worth, I did do a lot of work. Not just during the day, but also in the middle of the night … when everyone in NZ was at work and having meetings.
Does that earn me any sympathy?
No, thought not … fuckers.
Anyway, it was an amazing time and experience. I love NYC, especially in the summer – made even better that I got to see Andy, George and a whole host of other old cynic members while I was there. A lovely reminder of how chemistry trumps process to create magic work, possibilities and friendship.
At least for me – hahaha.
OK, enough sentimentality, let’s get on with things shall we …
There’s a lot written about trust – and so there should be, because it’s important.
But what I find interesting is that it is often expressed as ‘knowing the person will deliver what is expected of them’.
And while that is most definitely part of it, for me – it’s not really that.
Let’s be honest, that’s kind-of the minimum requirement you would – and should – expect when working with someone else.
No, for me, trust is far more about attitude, not just execution.
That you feel they care as much as you.
That they are committing to the goal, not just are interested in it.
That they are living up to the standards, expectations and effort you know they’re capable of doing.
That they will challenge and question …
Not to subjectively undermine, but to objectively make sure you’re being the best you can be.
Which is why listening is as much of a measure of their commitment as action.
And that’s why I think there’s a major difference between trusting a ‘supplier’ and trusting a ‘colleague’.
Because trusting a supplier comes down to a binary evaluation: they either delivered what was expected or not.
But trusting a colleague is much more nuanced …
Because it’s not just what ends up being created … but how it was done.
The problem is – in my mind – too few appreciate this difference, so the quality of the development is often dismissed in favor of the delivery of an outcome. And even then, the quality of outcome often doesn’t hold as much importance as the timing of it.
Which is why if you are lucky enough to find someone who you really work brilliantly with – be it colleague or client – embrace it, nurture it and treasure it.
Because they don’t just make the work more enjoyable …
And don’t just elevate your abilities, standards and taste …
They make sure everything you do feels exciting and worth doing, and in this quick-win, sprint-obsessed world we live in, there’s nothing more rewarding than that.
It’s important to note this is not simply about getting on with people, or having a laugh …
Oh no, this is much more focused than that, which is probably why it doesn’t happen nearly as much as we think.
Or hope.
It’s why I resonated with a phrase I heard someone say recently:
Love lots. Trust few. Always paddle your own canoe.
Which is why I am so grateful to PB, GB, AB, JC, RM, AW, MS and SP, for all they’ve done for me by going on journeys with me.
Of course there’s others – and I consider myself very lucky for that – but these are the ones who have proved it every time, and I just hope they feel they can say the same about me. Guess one day we’ll find out … ha.
Filed under: 2026, A Bit Of Inspiration, Colleagues, Corporate Evil, Corporate Gaslighting, Creativity, Culture, Leadership, Loyalty, Management, Money
A while ago, I listened to someone explain one of the best lessons they’d ever learned.
And they said what the title of this post says …
Don’t let temporary people make permenant decisions.
I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it because it has made me realise how much of what we have to deal with in life is because we have done the absolute opposite of that.
And we do have a responsibility in this …
Because while the people who have those positions have been put in there by others in similar positions … we allow them to fuel their commercial and egotistical self-interest by keeping quiet and compliant.
Now I get some people don’t really have a choice.
And I also appreciate people who stand up against it can easily be smothered and discarded.
But when I look at how much of our industry, discipline and life has been fucked over by temporary people making ‘self-interest driven’ permanent decisions, it’s bordering on criminal.
Well, in some cases, it probably is. Allegedly.
From making decisions that blatantly look after friends at the expense of other employees livelihoods through to destroying organisations so they can hit share price bonuses … we’re seeing more and more of these temporary people get paid vast sums even though they leave what they were responsible for, in a worse state than when it started.
Of course, the problem is their definition of ‘responsibility’ is to everyone other than the employees.
Shareholders.
Investors.
Themselves.
And probably not in that order.
So, while I have no problem with people being rewarded very well for doing very well … it’s crazy when ‘very well’ is defined by destruction rather than creation – regardless how hard they try and spin it otherwise.