There’s nothing more to add …
Well, other than the fact that I hope this is just a temporary look given we actually like each other and what we do.
Or at least we all pretend we do, hahaha.
Filed under: 2026, A Bit Of Inspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Communication Strategy, Corporate Evil, Corporate Gaslighting, Customer Service, Technology
A few months ago, I decided I needed to sort out my emails.
Specifically, how many I was receiving each day.
That’s not a fucked-up, humble brag … it was because after decades of internet use, I’d acquired so many companies sending me their shit because I’d either once ordered from them or made an enquiry to them, that it was genuinely costing me time in my day.
So, over the period of a week I vowed to ‘unsubscribe’ from 98% of every company email I received – with only a few organizations surviving the cull because I either found them genuinely valuable and interesting and/or their were legal implications if I didn’t act on what they sent me.
So off I went.
Every morning, I’d go through each email … find the ‘unsubscribe’ button, which would be hidden somewhere in the body copy, normally at the very, very bottom … and then watch my browser open up to the corresponding website so I could ‘click’ on the metaphorical, ‘FUCK OFF AND LEAVE ME ALONE’ FOREVER button and say goodbye to them forever.
Or so I thought.
Because some of those links didn’t open.
Some of those links didn’t automatically let you unsubscribe.
Some of those links had a messed-up UX that manipulated you into resubscribing without initially realizing.
Some of those links demanded you then jump through all manner of hoops before they would acknowledge you had achieved your goal.
And some of those links just ignored your request and kept sending you emails like a technological cockroach who refused to die.
And even after spending FIVE WORKING DAYS pressing ‘unsubscribe’ so often that I probably need a job number to justify all the time I spent doing it … and even after giving every one of these companies a week to get their shit together … there’s still 7 companies who keep sending me their bullshit.
EVERY. DAY.
Despite me unsubscribing from them again and again and again.
In some ways I’m almost impressed at how little they care about upsetting their audience … even though I have to admit, it has made me hate them with a zeal normally reserved for the true bastards of the world/
But what is also weird, is the companies who made unsubscribing easy – without fuss, mess, complexity or further demands – has made me want to sign up to them again. Because nothing shows how much a company really cares about their customers than how well they treat them even when it’s so they can say goodbye.
Have a great weekend.
Today is the 5th of November.
A day – back in 1605 – where some people tried to blow up the British houses of parliament.
And failed.
Yet despite that, the Brits celebrate it by blowing up shit. Fireworks mainly, but depending where you live, it can be homes too.
Yes it’s a bit weird, even by weird Brit standards …
A bit like celebrating losing the lottery by burning all your cash. Or something.
But for all the people not in the UK, I thought I’d let you feel part of it by igniting your ability to go “Ooooooh” and “Ahhhhh” at endless fireworks exploding in the sky in a spectrum of stunning colours.
And how will I do that?
By providing you with a TEN HOUR video of them.
And while I accept this won’t capture the full experience of a British Bonfire Night – which includes burning your mouth on a crappy, 10,000 degree, questionable hot dog as well as burning your hand on a crap sparkler while trying to spell out rude words in the sky – it’s a way for me to help bring the world together.
Like a Temu version of the UN. Enjoy.
You’re welcome.
Filed under: 2026, A Bit Of Inspiration, Aspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Customer Service, Food, Planes
This is going to be the most First World Problem post I’ve ever written – and I’ve written a lot!
So as many of you know, I fly a lot.
And – given the distances I travel – I get to fly a lot of that as business class.
I know … I know …
The reality is I don’t take advantage of any of the benefits because I tend to fall asleep as soon as the engines start [literally] and when I do eat on a plane – which isn’t very often – I tend to ask for an economy meal because my tastebuds are pure 1970’s Nottingham and I much prefer it.
However recently I was in the US, flying United, when I got served this …
How fucking beautiful does that look?
Appetizing.
Freshly made.
Relatively healthy.
It was such a shock I photographed it and sent it to my wife and she was as shocked as me.
Even more than that, it tasted bloody lovely and I don’t mind telling you, I was in shock. So in shock I’m writing this post about it.
And just to help put this in comparison – here’s the equivalent I once was served by British Airways business class.
I rest my case.
As many people have said, we eat with our eyes before we eat with our mouths … and I just don’t understand why so few airlines understand this.
Too many either cram the tray with every possible item to try and seduce you with abundance or surround you with fancy cutlery and glasses to distract you from the slop in front of you. But this is a perfect example of ‘less is more’ – acknowledging the ‘less’ is still done with obvious care and craft.
Which is a pretty good lesson for the industry at large because we seem to spend an inordinate amount of time and effort creating everything other than what is actually needed … either because certain clients think overloading their partners with expectations gives them control and power or certain agencies think giving their clients loads of stuff demonstrates they are good value.
Which reminds me of something a friend of mine recently told me:
“The easiest way to tell if someone knows what they’re doing is by what they’re requiring or producing. The more they want, the less they understand who their audience is, what their problem is and what they need to change their situation”.
Or said another way – and quoting the chef we interviewed for Tabasco, years ago:
“The more confident the chef, the less ingredients they use”.
The problem is right now – thanks to lack of clarity, lack of truth, lack of authority and abundance of procurement – we’re making soup with 10,000 ingredients and it doesn’t even taste good, let alone nourish people.
Filed under: 2026, Comment, Death, Food, Humanity, New Zealand, Robots, Technology
Yesterday I wrote about the ability to buy robot androids in NZ … and if you can buy it here, that means they’re pretty much already everywhere.
[Update: I didn’t write about this yesterday. But I do write about it tomorrow. Posting Fail]
I then went on to say that as redundant as that potentially makes humanity … once one of these robots has to attend a bad client workshop/brainstorm meeting, they’ll all breakdown and we’ll be back in control in no time.
Hurrah.
Except for the fact this thing exists … mot just in the World, but in Auckland.
Actually, not even just in Auckland, but in Birkenhead – where I live – which means it most definitely exists pretty much everywhere.
Yep, that’s a chicken burger.
A fried chicken burger.
Except instead of being in a bun – that’s a doughnut.
An iced doughnut.
Also known as ‘the cardiologist’s dream’.
And yet despite that, I’d bloody kill to sink my teeth into that 1800+ calories of death … even if one bite could end up killing me.
Which all goes to show, regardless how smart, tough, focused or teflon we think we are … we’re all scriptable to falling under the power of someone. Even if that someone is a fried chicken, pickles, cheese burger encased in a doughnut ‘bun’.