The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

Happy Halloween …
October 31, 2022, 8:15 am
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Emotion, Fear

How appropriate this years halloween falls on a Monday.

Surely there is nothing scarier than that?

6 letters, a lifetime of fear.

However, I’m a generous fellow so I’m going to help you get even more in the mood by giving you something to watch.

15 of the supposed most ‘scary videos’ on Youtube.

And while that may not sound very inviting, let me tell you a story about the horror movie director, Wes Craven.

Years ago – while working on Sony – I got to interview him as part of our ‘feel’ strategy.

He was very generous with his time and opinion and left me with this gem as regards how he sees what he does.

“I make people feel alive by scaring them half to death”.

So rather than hate me for scaring you with this video, thank me for making you feel alive.

On a monday.

You’re welcome.

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Tell Me ….
October 28, 2022, 8:15 am
Filed under: Cats, Colenso, Colleagues, Immaturity, Rosie

… you love Queen, your cat Rosie and you share an office with other cat lovers without telling me you love Queen, your cat Rosie and you share an office with other cat lovers.

I tell you what, however bad the day may be, this will make me happy.

Despite the judging, displeased look on all their faces.

Kate Maitland, you are a bloody genius.

Have a great weekend everyone.

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Collabs Are Becoming A Circle Jerk …

Before I start, I’ve been a huge fan of collabs over the years. Seeing what happens when two different artists or brands or artists and brands come together has been fascinating.

And for every terrible LG x Prada phone, there’s a Nike x Ben & Jerry’s sneaker.

But … but … it feels we’ve moved from collab to labelling.

Where it isn’t about what two parties can create with each other, but just renting space for another brand to slap their logo on.

Take these Travis Scott x Playstation x Nike sneakers …

Jesus Christ.

Where the Ben & Jerry’s felt crafted and cared for this is just … well, put it this way, it feels more like a bad promotional item than something that represents a true collab.

And the thing is, this approach is happening more and more – across all manner of categories – which is why I kinda love what Nobuaki Kurokawa has done with their first product launch from their CUGGL label.

Let’s be honest, they’re taking the piss.

Like, blatantly and unashamedly.

Not only does it look like it say’s Gucci, by making the design resemble graffiti, it feels like they’re also sticking two fingers up at the terrible and contrived Gucci/Balenciaga collab.

The Gucci x Belenciaga is especially horrific because individually, they’ve not really laid a foot wrong in building the value and position in culture of their brands. And then they do this.





Dad at the disco rubbish.

Basically, the fashion industry version of this.

Which is why I like what CUGGL have done so much.

Punking the brands pretending to be punking fashion.

Of course, Diesel did something like that before – though their mischievous eye was aimed at the counterfeit industry [even though it kinda said ‘fakes may be real’, which is the last thing they needed to do] however in terms of greatest accolade for mischief, that prize should have gone to the band Blink 182.

I say ‘should have’ because they ended up pulling out of potentially the greatest burn ever.

In the early 2000’s, Axl Rose was making a new Guns’ n’ Roses album.

It was unique because the only original member of the band was Axl himself.

He had fired all the band and was basically at his most indulgent ego best.

The only thing he’d announced was the album was going to be called ‘The Chinese Democracy’.

For years and years nothing came out.

The album postponed time and time again.

At one point, his record label, Geffen, pulled funding … and yet the recording still went on.

Enter Blink 182.

They announce they were recording a new album and guess what they were going to call it …

That’s right, The Chinese Democracy.

Better yet, because Axl was taking so long to release his version – they could be sure they’d be first, so history would always make it look that Guns n’ Roses copied Blink 182.

Alas they went cowardly on the idea, which is a shame … because that would have set a benchmark CUGGL and Diesel could only dream of reaching.

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The Fine Line Between Evil And Genius Media Planning …

A few weeks ago I saw something on twitter that has deeply conflicted me.

It was this …

That’s right, they’re lawn bowl mats … sponsored by Co-op Funerals.

Now I don’t know much about bowls.

I know they attract a much broader age of ‘player’ these days, but I’m still pretty sure the majority still are of the more elderly variety.

And given I’m 52, we’re talking proper old.

I could be wrong.

But given someone thought it was a good idea for Co-op funerals to sponsor the mat, it seems I may not be. And this is what has had me conflicted for weeks.

On one hand, it’s just fucking genius isn’t it.

Old people.
Chance to make arrangements before someone else has to.

But it’s also just a bit evil, isn’t it?

Old people.
Out enjoying themselves.
Message to remind them of their impending demise.

If I allowed comments, this is the sort of post where I know they would come into their own. But I don’t … which means I’ll be getting extra emails of commentary and abuse from the same people who used to do that on here.

And I don’t mind admitting I’m quite excited about that, And quite interested in what they’ll say.

Because I have the sneaky suspicion they may think it’s clever.

And that old people may find it both slightly amusing and kinda useful.

And that by doing something like this, it becomes a social media campaign by fact of it being infinitely shareable.

Or … they may say no one will give a shit because all it will be to them is a free mat so they can rest their knee as they try to destroy that prick from up the road who always seems to win.

But to whoever did this, I admire both your smarts and your mischief … because I haven’t seen something so perfect since [I think] Naked got their client – cheap meat in a can maker – Fray Bentos to sponsor some local Darts Players.

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This Post Will Save You A Fortune …
October 25, 2022, 8:15 am
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Youth

Nice long weekend for me.

I appreciate you didn’t have one, but surely an extra day free from this blog helped?

Well, regardless … I’m about to ruin it all for you.

So at some point in your life, you realise age is winning.

You look in the mirror and you don’t recognise what’s staring back at you.

It’s scary. It’s confronting. It’s deeply, deeply disturbing.

And it’s at this point you tend to consider one of 3 things:

+ Plastic surgery.

+ Radical fitness program.

+ A mid-life crisis.

And while they may all seem perfectly acceptable at the time … the risk, cost and sheer exhaustion of it all probably makes it counter productive.

But no one can say I don’t care about your wellbeing … because if you find yourself in this position, I can help you feel younger without ay damage to your skin, heart or marriage.

I know, I know … I’m so generous.

Because rather than spend copious amounts of time and money on that other stuff, just spend a bit of money and a bit of time on this …

Introducing Pop It Pal.

Pop It Pal is a technology that takes you back to your youth.

Those days where everything was carefree, exciting and firm.

Where you’d look in the mirror and instead of seeing the old haggard version of yourself, you’d see a young, healthy version staring back.

A young healthy version with zits staring back.

And while back then zits were the worst thing that could happen in your life, they were undeniable proof of adolescence and youthfulness … and that’s what Pop It Pal does for you, because it allows you to pop [fake] zits.

No, I’m not joking.

Squeeze your fingers and you can be taken back to when you were young.

Where you can feel the glory of erupting that spot.

That instantaneous feeling of going from monster to beauty.

And all this can be yours by simply purchasing Pop It Pal.

Much cheaper and safer that all that other stuff.

You’re welcome.

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