Filed under: 2024, A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Agency Culture, Apathy, Attitude & Aptitude, Authenticity, Brand Suicide, Brands, Communication Strategy, Complicity, Confidence, Consultants, Context, Contribution, Corporate Gaslighting, Crap Marketing Ideas From History!, Creative Brief, Creative Development, Creativity, Culture, Delusion, Differentiation, Distinction, Effectiveness, Egovertising, End of Year, Experience, Fake Attitude, Honesty, Influencers, Leadership, Management, Marketing, Marketing Fail, Mediocrity, Only In Adland, Perspective, Planners, Planning, Point Of View, Positioning, Pretentious Rubbish, Professionalism, Provocative, Purpose, Relevance, Reputation, Research, Resonance, Respect, Ridiculous, Standards, Status, Status Anxiety, Strategy, Stubborness, Stupid, Success, Talent, Toxic Positivity, Truth
As tomorrow is one of those terribly indulgent ‘thank you and goodbye to ’24 post’ [the blog equivalent of boring someone with ‘what they dreamed about last night’], I thought today should be a RobMegaRant™ post … ending the year as I hope to start next year, hahaha.
So with that, take a look at this bloody amazing picture.

How awesome is it?
I have absolutely no idea where it’s from or when it’s from but I can’t stop looking at it.
The browns.
The clothes.
And then – of course – the egg salad machine.
You can imagine that at the time, this was a demonstration of innovation.
Of technological advancement.
Of commercial optimisation.
A glimpse into an automated world of high efficiency and effectiveness.
Removing barriers and friction to provide audiences with consistent, satisfying results.
Except it wasn’t was it?
Not in the long-term … and most likely not in the short-term either.
Oh sure, there’s machines that make industrial amounts of egg salad to shove in cheap and cheerful sandwiches you get at the local petrol station … but in 54 years of being on – and around – this planet, I’ve never once seen any ‘public egg salad maker/dispensers’.
Not even in Japan.
And that’s because it’s a shit idea, for a shit-ton of reasons.
Taste.
Quality.
Consistency.
Health and safety.
The fact no one wants egg salad every single day of their life.
And that’s before we even get to issues such as ‘appetite appeal’.
Looking at the picture and you can’t help but wonder, “what the fuck were they thinking”?
Except our industry does a similar thing ALL. THE. TIME.
An endless production line of ‘proprietary’ systems, processes, models and formats … promising the world and promoted using almost identical language and benefits that was likely used for that bloody egg volcano machine.
Innovation.
Automation.
Optimisation.
Advancement.
Transformation.
Effectiveness.
Efficiency.
Put aside that in most cases, the only ‘proprietary’ element is the name that’s been given to it.
Put aside that in many cases, the people behind it have never created something of disproportionate value and impact.
Put aside that the vast majority of these ‘innovations’ are more about not being left behind rather than moving you forward. [Read: marketing transformation]
Put aside that in many cases, the real purpose of the product is to reinforce the ego – and/or bank account – of the person claiming to have all the answers.
Put aside that many of the companies who flock to it tend to be those who choose to abdicate and outsource their responsibility for decisions and choices.
Don’t get me wrong, there are some really good innovations in our industry. There are also far too many people who dismiss change simply because they don’t like it. And we cannot forget that we unfairly expect new ideas to deliver the results of established ideas.
However, when certain parties peddle their products, tools, services, models, formats with the attitude of it not just being the right way, but ‘the only way’ – where they guarantee success regardless of category, country or spend – then frankly, not only should we see their declarations as an admission of [at best] blinkered thinking or [at worst] evidence of being a chancer and/or hustler … we should be asking ourselves why the fuck are we blindly trusting the self-serving voice and opinion of those whose only major commercial achievement is elevating their own name and image.
I am over efficiency and optimisation being peddled as innovation and progress.
I am over process being regarded as more important than output.
I am over loose association being reframed as expertise.
I am over easy being more valued than quality.
I am over people thinking being good in one thing means they’re excellent in all things.
We need to stop thinking of insurance salesmen as pioneers.
Sure, the good ones have a role to play – especially when companies are downgrading training for their employees – but it’s not as a leader of marketing/brand/creative innovation. Even more so when the reality is many are either riding on the efforts and achievements of someone else or simply communicating the 101 of particular disciplines under the guise of it being at the highest academic standard.
Forgive me for my skepticism, but even if it was true – which it isn’t – I don’t see many universities achieving cultural status and influence through their marketing approach. Hell, most universities don’t even know how to differentiate themselves from each other.
Please don’t read this as being anti-education. God no.
The reality is the industry needs more teachers. Or should I say better ones.
Not the self-appointed guru’s who peddle their self-serving blinkered services for profit, but those who have been there and done that. Who have consistently done things at a standard that goes way beyond just basic levels of achievement. Who can talk from the perspective of being at the coalface, not from a pedestal. Watching on with their binoculars. We need to celebrate those with actual experience, not just assoicated opinions.
Or said another way, we need chefs not egg salad salesmen.
Lets hope in 2025, we get back to valuing the ingredients, not just the convenience.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Attitude & Aptitude, Communication Strategy, Complicity, Corporate Gaslighting, Crap Marketing Ideas From History!, Creative Development, Creativity, Culture
So here we are, the final week of blog posting for the year.
Last week was a lot of reasonably heavy posts but this week will be different.
Not just because it’s the holiday season, but because I’m in full-on scrape-the-barrel mode for content.
I know you probably think that has been the case for the last 10 years, but trust me, it’s even worse than you have previously experienced, exemplified by this:

This is an ‘adult store’ in Melbourne, Australia.
They’re probably in more cities across the country, but I passed this one on my way to the airport a few weeks ago.
I must admit, I burst out laughing when I saw it.
Not because ‘adult stores’ are funny, but because the name and the environment couldn’t have felt more opposite.
Maybe it’s just me … but a beige box, located on a miserable-looking industrial estate, near an airport, doesn’t scream SEXY to me.
Especially when that beige box displays a logo that looks like it came straight out of 1990’s UK kitchen or bed retailer.
It’s very much like those ‘experts’ on Linkedin who show they don’t know what the fuck they’re talking about by expressing their misguided opinion with blinkered and blind conviction and confidence.
Hence, we see people who are closer to insurance salespeople acting like they’re business liberators. We hear people who’ve never made anything great talking like they’re the ultimate educators. And we have adult retailers promoting themselves like the authority on expression.
We seem to forget there’s a major difference between those who exploit a category for profit and those who evolve the category through what they add and do … but in this world of quick wins, easy answers and justifiable delusion, quality of work plays a distant second to quality of ego.
And that’s why I hope for one major difference between 2025 and 2024 … which is we stop blindly following people based on popularity and start getting back to valuing what people have actually done. Because as the old adage goes, anything is easy when you’ve never had to do it and so the only way we can all be better is if we get back to focusing and valuing those who create the change, rather than those who simply offer their own self-serving commentary about it.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Age, Agency Culture, Apathy, Aspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Authenticity, Creative Development, Creativity, Culture, Delusion, Distinction, Diversity, Emotion, Inclusion, Love, Loyalty, Management, Marketing, Mum & Dad, Planners, Politics, Prejudice, Provocative, Relevance, Reputation, Resonance, Respect

I can’t believe next week we enter the final month of 2024.
How the hell did that happen?
My god, it’s been a whirlwind and while I’ll write my annual ‘wrap-up’ post in a few weeks, I have to say – bar three truly tragic events for me – a pretty good year.
I don’t take any of that for granted.
I know it could all fall apart in an instant.
Which may explain why I follow certain theories/behaviours/beliefs that – despite knowing they’re likely utter nonsense – help me feel I’m doing things that encourage ‘good stuff’ to happen for me and my family.
Or should I say, ‘extend’ the good stuff that my family get to enjoy.
That’s right, I’m talking about certain superstitions that I follow.
I won’t go into them in detail for fear of the men in the white suits popping around to put me in a jacket with no sleeves, but on top of working hard, doing what I promise and staying interested and open to stuff … they heavily influence and drive my actions and behaviours in equal measure.
Now I should point out the driving force of this is less about maintaining an income [though that is there, of course] and more about satisfying my curiosity and hunger.
You see, despite being 54, I’m still fiercely ambitious and hungry to do new, exciting and good things. In fact – given the stuff I’ve been fortunate to do over the past few years with moving countries and working with artists in the music, fashion and gaming industries – even more ambitious and hungry than I’ve ever been.
Of course I appreciate I’ve done a bunch of stuff but as I’ve written before, the more I do … the more I discover things I want to do. The problem is, the older you get, the more you know you won’t be able to do everything and so you want to try and ensure your time is spent on the stuff that fulfils you rather than drains you.
I get some people may read this and think I’m a fucking idiot. And I get it … because the basic narrative that is pushed out is the older you get, the less passion you have.
Hell, companies have used that as an excuse to get rid of experience for decades.
Worse, for a long time I believed that view too …
But what I’ve learned is that in many cases, it’s not the passion that gets tired, but the tolerance for bullshit.
The politics.
The processes.
The procedures.
The shiny-new-things.
The hang-on-to-the-old-things.
Corporate bullshit is endless.
And while I’m not suggesting people actively enjoy subjecting you to it – nor am I claiming all of it is pointless – I understand why so many people choose to walk away from it.
Which is all my way of saying how fortunate I consider myself …
Because while I have faced a bunch of bullshit in my time, the vast majority of my career has been working for – or with – people/companies and brands who value the work more than the politics. Who choose creativity over complicity. Who value what you do rather than devalue how old you are.
And that means at 54, the bullshit hasn’t won.
It may one day, but it hasn’t yet.
And that means I don’t just get to keep working with talent regardless of age, heritage, geography or discipline. Nor just get to learn, collaborate and create with people from all walks of life and from all fields of creativity – united by our desire to make something really fucking good, rather than something ‘good enough’. It means I get to keep enjoying it … being inspired by it and bringing my own energy and creativity to it.
So while there’ll be people out there who’ll make more money, have more things, possess bigger job titles or career positions than I’ll ever have … and while there may well come a time where the possibilities I see will be possibilities someone else has to realise … I can feel I beat the bullshit.
And while many won’t understand that.
Or even agree with that.
For a kid whose parents instilled in him the importance of living a life of fulfilment rather than contentment, it means that should I ever get to meet Mum and Dad again, I can thank them for teaching me stubbornness isn’t a fault, when done right, it’s an enduring gift.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Attitude & Aptitude, Brands, Creative Development, Creativity, Differentiation, Distinction, ECommerce, Marketing, Marketing Fail, Perspective, Planners, Planners Making A Complete Tit Of Themselves And Bless, Planning, Point Of View, R/GA
When I worked at R/GA, they got very excited about D2C brands.
Part of this is because they got a lot of business from brands who wanted their help to design the infrastructure for their D2C ambitions. Part of it was because they loved to talk about transformation and saw this as a major shift in brand development. And part of it is because a lot of their work – especially with NIKE – revolved around this type of thinking.
[Though I did laugh when a couple of their senior people in NY tried to convince me ‘Fuel Band’ was more valuable and important to NIKE than ‘Just Do It’ … and hated the fact I refused to buy their logic]
Look, I really liked R/GA – specifically the first year I was there – but I always felt the whole D2C approach was flawed. Didn’t have to be, but the way people/brands/companies saw it, made it that way.
When I at Wieden, P&G asked our opinion on the Amazon dash button.
They were massively excited by it as they saw it as a way to drive sales while being able to massively cut their marketing costs.
For those who don’t know what the dash button was, it was a piece of tech – connected to a specific item – that allowed customers to order from Amazon at the press of a button.
So if you spotted you were running out of washing powder, you could press the dash and within a day or so, you would get a new box delivered.
All good in theory except the only real winner would be Amazon.
And we told them that. Because the moment you let your brand become a commodity, your value is destroyed as is all the work you’ve put in to get into that position.
But that didn’t stop every man and their dog seemingly bang on about the virtues of D2C.
Nor did that make companies who had previously talked about the importance of brand, jump on the bandwagon.
And while some went on to achieve great success with this strategy – albeit, having to spend millions on building the brand value of their D2C org – the vast majority crashed and burned after, at best, a small moment in the spotlight.
That’s not to say new ideas are wrong – far from it – it’s to say that too much of the industry, despite what they may claim, are obsessed with the quick wins and short-term gains.
Worse, the reason for this is often less commercial and more egotistical.
A desperate need to look like they’re ‘in the know’ to those around them. A desire to be part of the cultural clique rather than risk being left behind by those who are skeptical, cynical or closed-minded.
I get it … no one wants to look slow or old or out-of-date and everyone wants a shot to elevate themselves up in collapsed time.
But as much as new ideas require a leap of faith – and that leap often takes a degree of courage – when it also requires you to let go of all you know and believe, then it says more about what you want to be than who you are.
Now of course, we all have our egos and ambitions – and that’s natural – but when your strategy to get where you want to go is chasing trends rather than following your values, that’s when you can find yourself in a whole heap of trouble.
Because following the pack without objectivity, values or context doesn’t make you an entrepreneur – it makes you an ambulance chaser – and once you have that reputation, you end up doing to yourself what D2C did to many companies … and that’s a position no one who claims to be ‘an expert in brands and brand building’ should ever find themselves in.


