Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Attitude & Aptitude, Brands, Context, Corporate Evil, Creativity, Culture, Cunning, Customer Service, Devious Strategy, Effectiveness, EvilGenius, Experience, Management, Northern, Perspective, Planners, Planning, Provocative, Relationships, Relevance, Reputation, Resonance, Standards, Strategy, Stubborness, Wieden+Kennedy
Maybe it’s because I’m British …
Maybe it’s because I’m naïve …
Or maybe it’s because I’m privileged …
But I’ve always been pretty shit when it comes to ‘negotiating’.
That changed quite dramatically when Metallica’s management taught me both ‘the value of value’ and how procurement is a game … but even now, there are situations where I feel weird to push back.
Ironically, the thing that snaps me out of it is not confidence, but disgust.
Recently a company sent me a bill that was 49% more than the previous year.
My situation hadn’t changed.
I was a long-term customer of theirs.
I had not used their services any differently than any time before.
And yet they sent me the invoice without explanation or consideration.
And I was pissed. Properly fucked off.
And while I could have just walked away, I wanted to play them at their own game.
I should point out my goal was not to get a price reduction; it was more so I didn’t feel a mug just blindly accepting their shit.
I wanted to feel I’d pushed back …
That I wasn’t a pushover …
And while I suspected they wouldn’t care – or maybe even notice – what I was doing, it was important for me that I did it.
Short story is I rang them up and ‘had a chat’ before ending up with all the price increase being removed.
Every last penny.
And while you may think that means ‘I’d won’, the thing is my definition of ‘winning’ had changed … which is why once I got the reduction, I informed the company I wouldn’t be working with them anymore and why.
Petty?
Sure.
Pathetic?
Possibly.
Pointless?
Maybe.
Unprecedented by me?
Errrrm, no.
But as my old Wieden boss – the great Jason White – once told some people, I’d asked him to meet,
“Be true. Be transparent. Believe they want to do the right thing with the right intentions. But if you suspect they think they’re hustling you … make sure you’re hustling them right back”.
Which is why, if you want to know the real art of ‘strategy’ – both in terms of effectiveness and creativity – don’t follow the methodologies or tools flogged by the never-ending list of Linkedin Pundits, study cats or petty bastards.
Filed under: 2025, A Bit Of Inspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Comment, Confidence, Content, Context, EvilGenius, Relationships, Relevance, Revenge, Rivalry, Social Media, Stupid, Twitter, Viz
Monday.
On the second week of this blog of the new year.
So what better way to start it than a post from Satan about Jesus.
There’s a lot of talk at the moment about the dangers and damage the internet – specifically social media – can do. And it’s all true. But then, anything in abundance with minimal control will do that – albeit, it’s worse when the person ‘in control’ is the egotistical, arrogant, spoilt, delusionist, that is Elon Musk.
However, among all the darkness is light.
Glimpses of the brilliant madness that the internet offered us all in the earliest of days.
Where people found ways to use it that served little purpose other than to add colour, weirdness and humour to our lives. Things like Star Wars Kid or Eric Conveys An Emotion.
But one other place that was a beacon for the good weird was, at least in its early days – when it was 100% Bird and 0% X – was Twitter. And while it is now a cesspit of hate, porn and ego, it still has some magic on there and two of my fave people are God and Satan.
Given I am not religious at all, that may seem strange. But what is even stranger is that they often post shit that I find far more sensible or insightful than many of the self-professed geniuses on there. Or Linkedin.
Of course, what they write has zero to do with religion and more pisstaking out of it. But like The Stones vs The Beatles … Oasis vs Blur … Coke vs Pepsi … Democrats vs Republicans … Kodak vs Fuji or Delivereasy vs Uber Eats … they make it – intentionally or otherwise – a 2-horse race so the cultural narrative around the topics and subjects they represent or cover are sucked up and conducted by them or about them.
In other words, they have a disproportionate influence in the direction of how and where the category travels … meaning it’s harder for others to break in and mess with stuff.
Not impossible. But harder.
Of course, there is also the danger of it backfiring. Where you get so obsessed looking to your side to see what your core competitor is up to, you fail to see what is happening behind you. Or in front. Or around. Just ask Nokia, for example. However, when done well – and with the right amount of self-awareness and openness – the power of the 2-horse race is almost unprecedented in its ability to shape a cultural and category narrative in your favour.
Which all sounds incredibly serious given this is coming from a photo of a tweet where someone is pretending to be Satan and taking the piss out of the ‘virtue signaling’ of Jesus.
Maybe it’s funny because it’s challenges the righteous pomposity of Christianity.
Maybe it’s funny because we all know someone a bit like this.
[Minus the death/crucifixion]
Maybe it’s funny because it’s petty and that can be funny.
But whatever the reason, it’s good … but still not as good as this masterpiece about Skegness by the Mablethorpe Tourist Board, courtesy of the twisted brilliance of Viz:
God, 2nd week in and I’m already at the barrel scraping level of posts.
It doesn’t bode well for the rest of the year does it?
Hello. I’m back.
And yes, I know you think my trip was basically a paid holiday – but I was actually working.
I know you don’t believe it, but that’s your issue not mine … ha.
Talking of issues not of your own making, a mate recently sent me this:
For those of you who don’t know who Chris Luxon is, he’s the NZ Prime Minister.
Without wanting to get into too much politics, he’s the leader of the National [Conservative] party … a ‘businessman’ … and was so desperate for the ‘top job’, he willingly formed an alliance leaders from parties whose views are, let’s say, less open or compassionate than the image the rest of the world has of NZ following Jacinda’s role as PM.
So basically, think Kiwi Boris … with less charisma and, to be fair, less lies.
I think.
I hope.
Now the fact he and his party got into government means many people here didn’t like Jacinda, Chris Hipkins [who replaced her] or Labour as a whole … and while their campaign was designed to raise tensions on issues such as immigration, environment and economy – as it seems is the approach for all National/Conservative/Republican parties around the world – the reality is he and National got elected fair and square.
Which is why this ad – and its real apparently – is both alarming and brilliant.
Alarming, because it is a new level of political aggression that is making more and more countries feel and behave like they’re in open civil war. And brilliant, because it’s a level of devious, underhand, once-you’ve-seen-it-you-can’t-forget-it evil, that you tend not to see from a Liberal/Labour party.
Well, I say that, but I don’t know who actually is behind it … but it’s safe to say it’s unlikely to be anyone associated with Chris Luxon or National.
Now I have no idea if this has been done before nor do I know if there is one also aimed at Labour’s leader, but given there is an old adage that states ‘Democrats want to be right but Republican’s want to win’ … whoever is behind this seems to have decided if you can’t beat them, join them.
Once upon a time, NZ did a tourism campaign called 100% Pure.
It was – and still is – the best tourism campaign of all time.
And while that is long gone, it seems it’s being revived under the new moniker of 100% Hate.
Which, I hope, is not the sort of porn you’ll see if you click on the Luxon link.
Better post tomorrow. Maybe. Hopefully. Unlikely.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Attitude & Aptitude, Birkenstocks, Brand, Brilliant Marketing Ideas In History, Cannes, Communication Strategy, Context, Creativity, Culture, Dysgraphia, Empathy, EvilGenius, Fear, Holiday, Imagination, Marketing, Martin Weigel, Otis, Paula
So I’m back.
And after an October where I went to Fiji, Australia, China and America … November is wonderfully static.
Don’t get me wrong, I love travelling … but that was ridiculous.
For all the talk of how COVID would change the way companies would work and interact, I’m meeting more and more people who are travelling more than they did pre-pandemic.
And that’s scary for a whole lot of reasons.
Personal, environmental, commercial.
Scarier than the that day where ghosts and ghouls are supposed to come out and haunt us. Also known as the day kids keep coming to your door demanding sweets.
Yes … that’s a terrible link to the point of this post, but I wrote it to originally appear on Halloween, but then I went to the US and missed my chance, so here we go.
Halloween in NZ is definitely less full-on than the US.
Oh my god … they love holidays and Halloween is one they embrace full-on.
When we lived in Manhattan Beach … it was like a community event.
The whole street would basically come out, all dressed in god-knows what, embracing the mood and the moment.
Obviously I hate that level of sociability … but even I got caught up in it, buying a ridiculously sized baby head from a shop, which I tried on in the car before casually looking to my right and seeing [1] I was next to a bank and [2] I had a security guard looking at me as if I was going to rob the joint.
Good times. Ahem.
Anyway, to keep with the ‘scary’ mood, Otis recently became the proud owner of these …
Yep … Crocs.
Fucking Crocs.
I know we talked about them recently in our ‘Strategy is constipated, imagination is the laxative’ talk … I know I have some sort of grudging respect that they are cool with charging $8 for each ‘personalised attachment’ you can add to the shoes … I know, with Otis’ dysgraphia, they are much easier for him to put on than many others … I know I can’t talk with my love of Birkies … but, but, but THEY’RE FUCKING CROCS.
Seriously, compared to them, Birkenstocks are liked pieces of art.
And yet they continue to live.
To thrive.
Like cockroaches of the footwear category.
Which means I have to salute their brand management and imagination.
Which is better than 99% of brands out there.
Which is why we put them in our Cannes talk.
And why I felt scared enough to put them in a post that was supposed to appear on halloween.
Filed under: 2026, A Bit Of Inspiration, AC/DC, Advertising, Aspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Authenticity, Bands, Before Fame, Brand, Brand Suicide, Business, Career, Collaboration, Colleagues, Comment, Communication Strategy, Complicity, Consultants, Content, Context, Corporate Evil, Creative Brief, Creative Development, Creativity, Culture, Delusion, Distinction, Effectiveness, Efficiency, Egovertising, Emotion, Empathy, Entertainment, EvilGenius, History, Honesty, Interviews, Leadership, Legend, Loyalty, Management, Marketing, Marketing Fail, Mediocrity, Meetings, Music, Perspective, Prejudice, Process, Relationships, Relevance, Reputation, Resonance, Respect, Standards, Status, Stories, Stupid, Success, Teamwork, Trust, Truth
Once upon a time, a man – who lived and worked in Newcastle, England – got a phonecall.
When he picked up, he heard a woman with a German accent on the other end, who asked “Are you Brian Johnson?”
He replied in the affirmative, to which the mystery caller said,
“You need to come down to London for an audition next week”.
Now Brian was a singer. In fact he’d once had a hit record with his band Geordie – but now he had his own business fitting car windscreens so it was a pretty left-field call to receive. Still, he was intrigued to which he asked the caller, “Who are you and who is the audition for?
There was a pause before the German voice informed him they worked for a music company – who had to remain nameless, just like the band he was told he had to audition for.
Brian was getting a bit fed-up at this point so pointed out in his thick accent,
“I’m not going all the way down to London for an audition unless you tell me who it is”.
Immediately, they were told that was not possible.
“Can you give me a clue … even if it’s just the initials of the singer or band?”
There was another pause – as if the caller was weighing up which would get them in more trouble: giving them a clue or not having Brian come to the audition – before they said,
“OK … here are the initials of the band, but I can give you no more information whatsoever. The initials are A, C, D, C”
The rest is history.
Brian did go to London and he did audition to replace the recently deceased Bon Scott, as the singer of AC/DC.
He got the gig and the first song he wrote – in fact the first song he EVER wrote – was You Shook Me All Night Long.
Then he wrote his second ever song, Back In Black.
Then his third, Hell’s Bell’s.
And not only did all these songs appear on the first album he recorded with the band, it went on to be the best selling album of the bands career. In fact it get’s even better than that, because the album, Back In Black, sold so many copies it become the best selling album OF ALL TIME [at that time] and even now – 46 years later – still ranks the 2nd best ever seller, with 50 million albums sold.
All this because Brian – through luck and persistence – got a key piece of information that made the difference between him choosing to go down to London or telling some random German female caller to “Fuck Off”.
Now it’s fair to say AC/DC were a known quantity at the time. A relatively successful quantity at the time. But who knows what would have happened if he hadn’t done the audition.
We wouldn’t have those 3 songs for a start … 3 songs that are not just iconic for AC/DC fans, but iconic fullstops.
The point being, one of the most important things you can do, to increase the odds of success is be transparent.
Transparent on where you are.
Transparent on what is needed.
Transparent on who is involved.
Transparent on the facts, timing and money.
Transparent on roles, rules and responsibilities.
Transparent on what the definition of success is.
I say this because there is not enough transparency right now – if anything, we operate in a world of opaqueness, which not only fucks up the potential of what can be created together, but breeds distrust and unhelpfulness.
Sure, things can change.
Sure, not everything may be known at the time.
But the more you hold things back, the more you’re not just fucking others over, you’re fucking yourself.
The greatest demonstration of respect in any partnership is transparency … so if your ego, need for control or fear stops you from doing that, then it doesn’t matter what you claim or who you blame, you’re the problem.
That doesn’t mean everything will fail, but it does mean you’ll never create history.
Or said another way …
If that German woman who rang Brian Johnson way back in ’79 had refused to give him any information on the name of the band she wanted him to audition for – as were their orders – then AC/DC may be a band few people would remember and Brian Johnson would be the graveliest-voiced car windscreen repairer in the North of England.
Of course, there will be some who say if that had happened, we’d never know what we’d lost.
And they’d be right, but they’d also be something else: someone incapable of creating or achieving anything truly significant.
In fact it’s worse than that … they’d be someone incapable of even aspiring to something truly significant and would actively goes out of their way to stop others from achieving it, claiming they’re ‘just looking out for the business’ when really it’s about their fear, ego, power and/or control.
No wonder my dear and clever friend George calls them, ‘commercial assassins and happiness vampires’.
Don’t stop someone finding your Brian Johnson because you think transparency is weakness.
It’s not, it’s rocket fuel.