The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]


There’s Chaos And There’s What The Hell Are You Thinking …
December 6, 2021, 8:00 am
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Customer Service, Experience

As many of you know, I am a big believer in chaos.

Hell, I even did a talk about it with the brilliant Martin Weigel at Cannes.

But the chaos we were talking about wasn’t random stupidity.

An exercise in self destruction.

No, in our version of chaos, there is method to the madness … an attempt to make something more powerful than it would be otherwise. Something that resonates deeply with the audience we’re talking to rather than some superficial, passive relevance.

Basically, it is the opposite of this …

What the absolute fuck?

This was in a lift in Taipei years ago.

I remember walking in and thinking I was in an episode of Punked.

It took me 10 minutes and a severe headache to work out how to get to my floor. And then, that night, I was woken up by my room swinging side-to-side as we were having an earthquake.

I swear the reason I didn’t seek safety on the streets below was because the idea of getting back in that lift was too much for me to deal with.

I didn’t take the photo above … sadly, I lost my phone at the time, which meant I lost the image. But a friend recently sent me theirs, as a reminder of an experience even Tim Burton couldn’t conjure up.

I still wonder what the hell they were thinking.

And why they allowed it to stay that way for a while.

But regardless what it the reason, it ensures that however bad this week is for you, it’s not going to be as messed up or headache inducing as this.

You’re welcome.



Nothing Shows You Care Than When Things Are Shit …

Just like HR is often about protecting management from their people rather than the other way around, the same can be said for customer service.

Of course, no one says that, but there’s far too many examples of companies stating the importance of their customers, and then using their customer service department to completely undermine them.

As I’ve written before, real customer service is demonstrated when things are bad, not good.

Let’s be honest, when a company can spot a sale, the full charm-offensive is on display.But when things go bad … oh, that’s when the truth is often revealed.

The irony is that this is the exact moment you can create a level of loyalty that can last a lifetime.

I’ve talked about the time VW came good after my brand new Golf GTI had the gearbox collapse and the turbo blow up … and I’ve found another example of a brand making something bad, a little bit better simply because they looked at things from their customers perspective and acted accordingly.

Isn’t that amazing?

Considerate. Compassionate. Personal. Helpful. Generous.

At the worst of times, a company has found a way to not just solve a problem – but help relieve some of the pain, that wasn’t even of their own making.

If a pet food company can do that – with their relatively low priced product – then any company should be able to. But many don’t. Not because their staff don’t want to, but their bosses won’t let them.

Years ago I worked with a consultant called Geoff Burch.

He was a beautiful maniac.

What made him great was he challenged management to live up to their responsibilities – both to their companies reputation and their employees ability to be successful.

We were working on an Italian car brand together and at the client briefing, the CEO said the call centre staff were offering too many benefits to appease dissatisfied customers.

Geoff asked why they were dissatisfied and the response was their were reliability problems.

Quick as a flash, he replied:

“Maybe you need to realise your responsibility to your employees is more than just a desk, a roof and a paycheck, but making a product that is fit for purpose. I can’t help a company who wants to blame others for the faults they have created and protect”

It was incredible.

And while there was a very awkward atmosphere in the room after that outburst, the CEO – after what seemed like a lifetime – acknowledged he was right.

To be fair, it helped that Geoff had an incredible reputation, but he wasn’t saying anything truly revolutionary, he was simply saying ‘reputation is based on what you do, not what you say’.

And while that should be plainly obvious, it’s amazing how few companies still don’t get that. The companies who think making a few dollars more today is more valuable than a lost customer tomorrow.

Seriously, the way some companies operate, it’s like a bloody ponzi scheme.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not suggesting you should ‘spend your way’ into customers hearts.

This is simply about valuing your customers perspective rather than purely seeing the World through your own.

Which is, unsurprisingly, the true definition of customer service.



A Story About Systems Vs Humans …

We need systems.

We need them for all manner of how we live.

From ensuring we get our content on Netflix through to ensuring our food is safe.

Systems drive efficiency and effectiveness and are a competitive weapon for business.

But they can also be suicide.

When ‘human centred design’ isn’t that human.

When you focus more on what the system does rather than who it’s for.

When you set rules that become dictatorial rather than accessible.

And while the post below is funny, it’s a good reminder that if you don’t put the needs of people first – rather than what you want the needs of people to be – then you not only run the risk of having to tell your customer/client/colleague “the computer says no”, you may end up calling them a loser … literally and metaphorically.

Worse, the person telling them that is a bitch. Apparently.

Again, literally and metaphorically.

And then you will have invented a new system.

The customer disservice and ineffective model.



Just Show You Give A Damn …

I hear so much about brand experience these days.

How the focus is to ‘remove the friction of purchase for the customer’.

That they genuinely believe this means they’re being valuable to their audiences.

And while that is rather misguided – given it is done to ultimately be in their own interests – if brands genuinely want to do right by their customers, then all they have to do is something their customers find valuable.

I’ve written a ton about this over the years.

From Timpson dry-cleaning suits/dresses for free if you have a job interview to the Co-op ensuring their food delivery staff make time to talk to lonely householders and almost everything in-between … but nothing made an impact on me like the experience I had with Texas Instruments.

Brand experience isn’t something you simply outsource to an ecosystem.

Sure, that can help improve overall efficiency or engagement … but in terms of offering an experience that helps people actually connect to the brand, then the brand has to do something that actually connects to the customer.

Something personal.

Something valuable. [To the customer, not just to themselves]

Something that demonstrates going out of normal practice.

Something like this.

Now I know what you’re thinking.

“But brands can’t do this sort of thing on an ongoing basis”.

And you’re probably right.

This sort of thing costs money.

But there’s two sides to this.

1. As H&M have shown with their free suit hire campaign, the return of acts like this can be significant both in terms of driving affinity and awareness.

2. If everything you do is based on the perceived ‘value exchange’ you’re making between brand and customer [which is always bollocks, because brands always over-estimate how much their actions are worth in the eyes of the people they’re dealing with] then you don’t really care about your audience, you only care up to a set amount of money and/or time.

Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate there are many aspects brands need to manage to keep their business going. But like companies who claim their staff are their greatest asset before treating them like shit, brands better know that they can’t say they care about their customers when they evaluate them purely by a financial transactional value.

It doesn’t mean you have to go crazy, but it does mean you have to actually give a shit about what they value not just what you want them to value.

Which is why I love the Marvel example so much.

Because they did it.

More than that, they did it and didn’t make a huge song and dance out of it.

No wonder they’re the home of the superhero.



It’s Not Hard To Make A Difference …

One thing that actually angered me throughout COVID was the attitude supermarkets adopted over the Christmas break.

Don’t get me wrong, they did an amazing job to ensure food supplies were maintained but they also did it because they were making incredible profits at the same time.

I’m cool with that.

I’m less cool with how some still lobbied for government benefits, made whole departments unemployed – looking at you Sainsbury’s – failed to use the Christmas period as a time to ‘give back’ to essential workers [ie: their own staff] and just ran bog-standard ads [even though they were generally pretty poor] … all the while claiming they were a version of ‘ one of us’.

Which is why this little gesture by the Co-op made an impression on me.

It’s very nice.

Not bombastic. Not chest beating. If anything, it’s almost silent.

But it’s impact for those suffering from isolation could be huge.

I really like this. Not just because it more needed than many think, but because I can imagine there are a lot of possible implications on their business should their customers take them up on it.

I have no idea how many customers Co-op delivers to each day, but if each customer just wanted a 5 minute chat, that means the subsequent deliveries will be 5 minutes late.

The more customers, the more deliveries get impacted in terms of time.

That can add up to something significant and potentially make other customers frustrated.

Maybe they’ve put on more delivery drivers to off-set this.

Maybe they’re only going to offer this for a limited time.

Maybe no one will actually take them up on any of this.

But even then, I can see a lot of reasons why a lot of companies would say no to this idea.

The cost.

The impact.

The potential for logistical nightmares.

Which is exactly why I think the Co-op have done something pretty great in doing it.

Because while words, money and countless bloody ‘purpose statements’ may make a company feel they’re doing valuable stuff for the community, its actual acts of action that proves to the community you actually care.

It’s not that hard to make a difference. If you actually want to make a difference.