Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Attitude & Aptitude, Authenticity, Brand Suicide, Comment, Communication Strategy, Corporate Evil, Crap Campaigns In History, Crap Marketing Ideas From History!, Creative Development, Creativity, Culture, Differentiation, Imagination, Management, Marketing, Marketing Fail, Planning, Point Of View, Positioning, Pretentious Rubbish, Relevance, Resonance, Wieden+Kennedy
Once upon a time, endlines meant something.
They were distinct, explained a brands value or purpose.
And more often than not, were packed with personality.
Then Dan Wieden fucked it up for everyone.
You see his famous JUST DO IT became the benchmark for all brands.
Marketing Directors craved a line that summed up who they were in 3 words.
The number of words was more important than what it said … which is why you now get this …

What a pile of shite.
Bland, contrived, sameness …
Literally doing the opposite of what it is supposed to do.
Designed to appeal to the ego of the board rather than the hearts of the audience.
All because we have fallen into the trap of believing simplistic equates to effectiveness.
It doesn’t.
Simple might do … but simplistic is the lowest common denominator that requires zero thinking because it makes zero impression.
It’s why I sit here and can remember endlines from my childhood more easily than end lines I watched 10 minutes ago.
Handmade by Robots … for Fiat.
Refreshes the other parts other beers can’t reach … for Heineken.
Do you love someone enough to give them your last Rolo … for, ahem, Rolo.
Of course there’s a few modern endlines that work … GoPro’s ‘Be A Hero’ for example [though they went and fucked it up by changing it to utter blandom] … but in the main, companies seems to like endlines that sound like they know what they’re doing but don’t really say much at all.
At cynic we used to call these ‘Yoda Statements’, but what is even scarier is consultants are being paid a fortune to come up with this sort of twaddle.
That’s right, companies who claim to know how to help business grow are coming up with statements that literally make companies blend into everything else.
And yet they still are valued more highly by clients that companies who know how to push, provoke, inspire and capture the imagination of culture through creativity.
If anything tells you how mad the World is, surely one of them is that.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Agency Culture, Anniversary, Attitude & Aptitude, Authenticity, Brand, Brand Suicide, Comment, Communication Strategy, Confidence, Corporate Evil, Crap Campaigns In History, Crap Products In History, Creative Development, Creativity, Culture, Differentiation, Experience, Focus Groups, Food For Thought, Imagination, Innocence, Innovation, Insight, Marketing, Marketing Fail, Perspective, Planners, Planners Making A Complete Tit Of Themselves And Bless, Planning, Point Of View, Relevance, Resonance, Standards, Valentine's Day

One of the things that frustrates me is when companies talk loudly and proudly about their ambition but then follow it up with, “but we have to take baby steps to get there”.
The only thing that annoys me more is when agency folk say the work they’ve made isn’t great, but it does, “push the client a bit further than they were before”.
Look, I get it … there are many implications to what we do, but as much as this ‘softly, softly’ approach may sound like it makes sense, it often ends up being counter-productive.
Being slightly better than where you were means nothing if everyone around you is taking huge strides forward.
But of course, just blindly rushing ahead often ends up with people getting burnt … just like planning your progress while constantly looking through the rear-view mirror.
At some point, you have to take a leap.
A step-change from what is known and established to something that changes how you, your audience and your competitors look at what is possible.
For me, this is what innovation truly is about, not micro-improvements designed to keep a company or product up to date with what the category and their competitors are doing.
I get for the company involved, that may feel like a big step – and for them, maybe it is – but it’s not really moving them ahead, it’s just keeping them closer behind the people leading – and owning – change.
To make it worse, culture don’t really care how big a step it was for you, they care about what’s in it for them – so if it’s not done to move them forward, you’re basically putting the ‘no’ in innovation.
So how do you leap forward without falling?
Well, on one level, you can’t.
Innovation of any kind runs the risk of failure … that is inherent to anything that is trying to dramatically move forward.
However you can improve the odds of success.
I’m not just talking about having an open attitude towards failure … where you look at it as a way to learn and progress rather than to lose due to unnecessary risk.
I’m talking about the power of insight.
Insight gets a bad rap these days.
Some of it is because a lot of things people claim are insight are anything but.
However I have been noticing an increase in the number of people using the Henry Ford quote of, “If I asked people what they wanted, they’d say a faster horse” … to basically try and undermine the value of insight.
But as I’ve talked about for years, if someone couldn’t tell from that quote that people wanted to get from A-to-B faster than they currently are able to do, then they’re a fucking idiot.
Sure, there is a lot of work to do to get from ‘speed of mobility’ to the creation of the motor vehicle, but the foundation of what people are looking for is right there for all to see.
Or hear.
Contrary to what many say, I personally believe people do know what they want … they just don’t know how to express it.
It might be said in hidden ways.
Or through actions written off as stupidity.
Or via behaviours that push against tradition.
Or with associations that feel random or misunderstood.
Or simply the core of a subculture inventing their own approaches.
It could be anything.
Which is why I believe our job is to listen, explore and investigate … recognize the clues culture expresses through their secret codes so you can work with your creative friends to translate this into something that defines something new.
Creates step change not a degree of change.
Reveals a new possibility rather than remakes something old.
Basically resonates with the speed and direction of culture, rather than tries to be relevant to the present rules.
And while that may indeed still fail or just require a shitload of hard work to evolve the idea into something infectious or – eventually – inevitable, it means you are leading change rather than being shaped because of it, which has the potential to change your future in ways no one could ever imagine.
Of course, the problem is not just that many people claim to want pragmatism but insist on micro-progress based on established behaviours, rules and habits … there’s the issue that some people evaluate something that challenges convention by the standards of what is already in place – ignoring the fact the idea they are evaluating it against has been given literally decades to hone their offering and establish their role.
Or said another way, some people happily kill something before it has been given the chance to be something, because they’re basing it on what they think rather than translating the codes of what culture want.
Like Blockbusters, who passed on Netflix.
Or Nokia who dismissed the threat of the Apple iPhone.
Or VW who basically laughed at Tesla and their electric car.
And while I accept anyone who wants create the future – rather than have it created for them – has a lot of obstacles to jump, there is good news.
Because for those who have competitors who believe progress only comes through refining and optimizing what they already have, they have been given the gift of time to create something that redefines the rules.
Leapfrogs established behaviours.
Create a new set of standards and expectations.
Because the only way to counter money, heritage and distribution is to innovate past it, in the knowledge that you know you’ve found something interesting when everyone feels the impact of your pragmatism …
Like a lightbulb compared to an optimised candle.
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Before I go, to ensure I leave you in the Valentine’s Day spirit, here’s what love is in the modern age – as described by the wonderful Amelia – who DID give me permission to post this, so keep your insults to yourself.
Got to be honest, I’m glad I am married because if I wasn’t, I’d either end up single or in jail.
And yes John, I did say prosperity instead of posterity. Deal with it!
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Attitude & Aptitude, Brand Suicide, Communication Strategy, Crap Campaigns In History, Crap Marketing Ideas From History!, Culture, Design, Egovertising, Marketing, Marketing Fail, Pretentious Rubbish
Yesterday I wrote a post about stupid.
Well, it appears it may be the theme for 2020, because I just saw this …

Yes, that is an ad for a new suitcase that is making a big deal that it comes with wheels.
WHEELS.
Actually it’s much more than that because they’re making a big bloody deal about where the wheels are supposedly from.
Now I know I once bought a wifi suitcase that the security people at the airport wouldn’t allow me to take on a plane because the ‘battery charger’ wasn’t removable, but even for me this is utterly bonkers.
Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely appreciate Japan’s perfectionist, craft mentality – to make a big deal about ‘wheels made in Japan’ is possibly the best example of bonkers brand manager ego/delusion that you’ll see this year.
And no, I didn’t buy it.
Cheeky bastards.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Attitude & Aptitude, Brand Suicide, Communication Strategy, Corporate Evil, Crap Campaigns In History, Crap Products In History, Creativity, Culture, Fake Attitude, Marketing, Marketing Fail
So I saw this ad recently in Amsterdam airport.

Now maybe it’s just me, but when I think of Jimmy Choo – I think of expensive women shoes, so when I think of Jimmy Choo as a male fragrance – I think of an expensive scent that smells of women’s feet.
I’m not sure this is the product expansion they went to do. Yet.
Another thing they shouldn’t have done is use the words, URBAN HERO.
No offense Jimmy Choo … but they are the least appropriate words that could ever be used in connection with your brand.
Urban?
URBAN????
You have spent years banging on about how the Jimmy Choo universe is one filled with galas and fashion shows.
Even the image shows the bloke [cut off at the ankles I note] sitting in front of some pristine, clinical ‘feature’.
Sorry, but you’re about as urban as Prince Andrew claiming he had Pizza Express in Woking.
And then there’s the word hero.
Hero?
Hero of what exactly?
Pretentious pricks?
Put them together and you get more evidence that many – but not all – who operate in the fashion world are more out of their head than any member of the Happy Mondays at their musical peak.
I hate everything about this ad.
EVERYTHING.
But then given they have made it about a man who smells of women’s feet and called him an urban hero, I don’t think I will have to worry about it being around for too long.

Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, America, Attitude & Aptitude, Authenticity, Brand, Brand Suicide, Chaos, Comment, Communication Strategy, Confidence, Corporate Evil, Crap Marketing Ideas From History!, Creativity, Culture, Customer Service, Daily Mail, Emotion, Empathy, England, Equality, Family, Guns, Home, Human Goodness, Insight, London, Love, Loyalty, Luxury, Marketing, Marketing Fail, Packaging, Parents, Perspective, Relationships, Relevance, Resonance, Social Divide, Standards, Unfair Life, United Nations, Wankers
So today, I start working from home due to the devastating spread of corona virus.
As someone who has lived through SARS, avian and swine flu, you’d think I would be fine with it … but the way the government and media have responded, I have to say has left me on edge.
It feels like 28 Days Later – as we hide, hoping the invisible virus won’t get us while looking suspiciously at anyone who is outside or has a casual sneeze.
Personally I don’t think the government are taking it seriously enough.
I also think a lot of people are being way too blase about it.
But what’s worse is that while many of us are going to be inconvenienced, the elderly, the homeless, the single parents, the temporary workers, the unemployed and the small business owners are going to face a horrific time and no one seems to be creating plans for how they can cope.
I’m addition, it’s showing the worst of society.
From that fat, lying, cheating bastard who is the President of America – to the rapid increase in gun purchase in the USA [seriously, WTF?] to the disgusting locust like behaviour going on in across supermarkets all over the World.
I tell you what, any of these people who ever negatively judged immigrants, refugees or boat people better not do that from now on.
Though what’s the betting they’ll claim their situation is different.
I guess they’re right.
Refugees, migrants and boat people are trying not to die. They’re just trying to continue living in comfort and wipe their arse with 3-ply.
But through it all there have been signs of humanity showing their best side.
Coming together.
Uniting.
Looking out for others.
From the wonderful singing that is happening on balconies across Italy to Waitrose making sure all small business suppliers are paid the next day to LVMH doing this …
Given there are some companies you’d expect to jump to societies help who are acting like absolute wankers, it’s even more amazing LVMH are acting so swiftly and generously.
When this all passes, some companies will discover profit before people ends up costing them profit and people.
It’s a strange time but we will get through it – but what will make it better is if we can find ways to help those who feel left behind.
I’m working on something and there’s options already in place for the elderly – like this – but if you have more ideas, please let me know.
Most of all, look after yourself.
So far, 2020 has a lot to improve on.