The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]


When Did Professionalism Become About Celebrating Bad Taste?

Over the years, I’ve had people call me ‘unprofessional’.

Never for the work I produced, but for how I have approached the work.

Whether it’s the way I’ve dressed.
Whether it’s the way I’ve proved a point.
Whether it’s the way I’ve asked a question.
Whether it’s the way I’ve countered an objection.

I should point out this never came from people you would think could take exception to it.

Over the years I’ve found myself in the ridiculous situation of presenting to – and working with – some of the World’s toughest and best CEO’s and CMO’s, be it Richard Branson, François-Henri Pinault, Phil Knight, Elizabeth Warren, Myley Cyrus or even James Hetfield.

And not one of them had an issue with me. Not one.

If truth be told, I think they quite liked the fact I was ‘me’ … to the point I presented to Phil Knight wearing Birkenstocks and then I was sent some Nike’s that had been adapted into a ‘birkie’ for me. [which I sadly lost in one of our country moves]

No, the people who labelled me as unprofessional were almost universally ‘middle-men’ … people who thought their position in a company meant they could dictate how people acted, not just presented.

[The exception to this was Anthony Kiedis of RHCP fame, but as I have documented many times – given how much of a prick he is universally acknowledged to be, I take that as a badge-of-honour rather than a personal slight. Plus the others in the band were lovely]

Anyway, the point of this whole rant is that it seems professionalism is becoming more and more about appearance and process adherence than the standard of the work and the rigor that went into it.

Don’t get me wrong, ‘presentation and process’ has a role to play … but when the people who are the most focused on it tend to be the people who’ve never made anything significant with it, you start to think they maybe use professionalism as a label to hide behind rather than a standard of work to live up to.

But here’s the other irony …

Often the companies who claim to bang on about ‘professional standards’ the most, are the ones with the most questionable behaviors.

And while that could lead me to talk about companies like McKinsey …

Or the financial institutions and their complicit, self-serving actions relating to the Sub Prime Mortgage bullshit …

I thought I’d highlight something else …

This.

Seriously Linkedin, why – of all the images you could have created to represent ‘a new job’ – did you choose this?

It makes Google’s logo look like it was designed by Picasso, rather than – arguably – Stevie Wonder.

But at least Google’s has charm and charisma. And represented who they [once] were …

But this?

What the fuck does this represent?

I’ll tell you … a company who loves to talk about professionalism but increasingly behaves in ways that are the antithesis of it.

A dumbing down of standards and behaviors in an attempt to gain increased popularity.

Hell, even Microsoft’s ‘Mr Clippy’ is arguably less offensive given that had an alleged degree of usefulness associated with it.

Empashsis on the word ‘alleged’.

Which is why if anyone ever questions your professionalism in the future, reply with “you’re welcome”, because you’re not only likely doing something right, you’re doing something they never could or that anyone in their right mind would ever aspire to.

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If You Want A Career, Wear Your Fastest Shoes …

Once upon-a-time, I hired a head of planning for NIKE at Wieden Shanghai.

They’d come to my attention via a colleague who’d worked with them in the past.

On top of that, they had a good pedigree of work and – just as importantly – they loved sport.

I was excited to welcome them into the team and everything was good … until it wasn’t.

One evening, I received an email saying they’d thought about it and didn’t want to do it.

I understood the cold feet, they were US based and I was asking them to move to China … but we had spent a lot of time discussing this and they had assured me they were up for it.

And they probably were – when it was theoretical.

Everything is fine when it’s theoretical.

The problems always lie once you move to reality.

What bugged me was this person refused to get on the phone to discuss it. They sent their email and in their mind, that was the only correspondence they were going to enter into.

Was I pissed?

Yeah, initially I was … because we’d invested a lot of time and effort into helping this person get a good taste of what the opportunity was, what life was like here and what we’d do to make their move as easy as possible. Add to that, I always take huge responsibility when bringing people over from another country and it all felt like they had just wasted our time a bit.

But by the emorning, I was fine with it.

In fact, I was bloody happy about it.

Because if they didn’t want to come to us, I sure as hell didn’t want them to be with us.

Now I appreciate that may sound cold as hell – and I was grateful they made the call before they actually moved here – but I haven’t got the time to waste on people who aren’t excited about what they could be doing and learning and who only want to repeat or surround themselves with the stuff they know and have done.

We used to have a lot of those people apply to be at Wieden Shanghai.

Same with Colenso, albeit to a lesser degree.

People who want to work at the agency, but don’t want to move for it.

Oh they say all the right things.
They complain about all the right things.
But then you realise they don’t want to change any of the things.

They prefer to be a blame thrower rather than an opportunity grabber.

I find that bonkers … especially for strategists … but it happens more than you could ever imagine. People only focusing on what they lose rather than all the things they gain.

And you gain a lot. In every single possible way.

But that’s not what this post is about …

Because the person I hired to replace the person who walked away, was the brilliant Paula Bloodworth.

THAT Paula Bloodworth. The fucking weapon of strategy and creativity.

A person with a reel that is better than entire agencies, let alone strategists.

And while I take absolutely no credit for all she has gone on to achieve, I do express my gratitude to the person who pulled out the job.

Had they not done that, Paula would not have entered my life … and given she is one of the most important people in my life – not as a colleague, but a full-on friend – that is something I feel eternally grateful for.

In many ways, my job at Colenso followed a similar story.

They’d hired a CSO from Australia, but before they could move, COVID happened and they realised they didn’t want to leave where they were.

It was at that point, Colenso saw I’d been made redundant from R/GA and – having almost got together in 2015 – they put in a call.

Had that not happened, I’d likely still be in the UK or back in the US … rather than at a place that is increasingly more special to me with each passing year.

‘Accidental Luck’ is everywhere …

Hell, we’re in talks with someone who embodies this on steroids.

Where they sent a VERY speculative email at the very moment a candidate we were talking to, pulled out.

OK, it helps they’re talented and have a ton of potential we see and can/will grow … plus there’s the good fortune we have a new client who is not only based in the very country they’re from, but also works in the same category they’ve been focused on for the past few years and they want to become what they want have always wanted a brand in that category to be … but suddenly a person we may never have known – let alone hired – could be someone we get to call a brilliant new member of our strat gang soon.

Hopefully.

For fucks sake, hopefully, hahaha.

[And if they don’t, they don’t – we all move on – however the real lesson they need to understand is what I write about next in this post … that is if they read this blog, which they don’t. Which is another sign they’re smart … haha.]

Which goes to the point of this post.

We can plan our careers to within an inch of their life.
We can study and follow the latest theories and systems.
We can spend time looking at every possible permutation.
We can demand every part of the job is described in minute detail.
Hell, we can even write 20 Linkedin posts a day, every single day.

But none of that – absolutely none – matters as much as being ready to act when the opportunity strikes.

Yes, it’s nice to think you will always have companies come to you.
Yes, it’s nice to think you will always have options and choices.
But often, the best thing you can do for your career is be ready to go when someone else isn’t.

If I am being honest, I owe pretty much everything I have ever done to the fact I’ve always been willing to move to wherever the best opportunities was located and then work my ass off to make great things for them.

Or said another way, if I heard of something exciting [and credible] was on the table, I was on the plane.

No if’s.
No buts.
No umming and ahhing.
I was sprinting towards it.

Doesn’t matter if it was an agency in China, an artist in America or a fashion designer in Italy … if it is interesting, intriguing and scary-as-fuck, I am there.

Now of course I appreciate not everyone has the ability to do this.
I also understand that ‘moving countries’ for a job has become infinitely harder.
And I get that there are occasions where opportunities can turn into fucking nightmares.
[Though that’s very rare as long as you stick to the rule that is detailed a bit further below]

But this isn’t really about your willingness to move countries – though that can help – it’s more about your hunger to go after what excites and interests you …

That doesn’t mean a role has to be perfect.

Frankly, when companies say there are no faults, that is ALWAYS a red flag … it’s more about whether the opportunity excites you and if the company and the person who will be your boss have a track record of consistently doing good shit. Maybe not pulling it off every time, but always pushing to do interesting things and having a on-going history of doing it.

It’s how I ended up working at Wieden … which definitely isn’t perfect.
It’s how I ended up working with Artists … who definitely aren’t perfect.
It’s how I ended up working with amazing creatives … who definitely aren’t perfect.

It’s important, because for all the good things the Bloodworth’s, the Weigel’s – and dare I say it – the Campbell’s have achieved, one of the biggest reasons for it is whether it’s a boss, a team, a company, a client or even a creative opportunity … we never, ever, ever look a gift-horse in the mouth.

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Here’s To Truth In Advertising …

I’m back.

And – as usual – I found my heart in China.

I love that place so much. Literally love it.

It is arguably the only place in the World – and certainly the only place I’ve lived – where I feel I am able to breathe.

Obviously I mean that metaphorically [though they’ve sorted out the air, big time]… but the energy, the craziness, the extremes and the constant change bizarrely makes me feel calm, settled and at peace.

I don’t understand why – I get that’s bonkers – but it does and always has, and while I won’t ever live there again, I will find any excuse under the sun to keep going back.

For me, it’s more than a place I once had the honour and privilege of living … it feels ‘home’.

That does not mean I do like – or am not grateful – for all the other countries I’ve had the incredible opportunity to live in, but there’s something about China that I connected to on a level that is incomparable to anywhere else I’ve been. And while it is getting a bit too smooth, slick and convenient for my liking [haha] the people keep it real.

Amazing. Interesting. Dramatic. Smart-as-fuck.

I met some incredible people on this trip.

Not just old mates [who I kept bumping into on the street, which is something I’ve never done in Auckland, despite being a fraction of the population size and geography – haha] but some brilliant new people who I hope will become long-term new mates. And nothing sums this up more than the fact I was out all night.

ALL NIGHT.

TWICE!!! [Admittedly once was so I could listen to Forest play in Europe with the worst manager since Megson, Ange]

Jesus Christ, I’m 55 … I should be in bed with a Hot Chocolate by 8pm shouldn’t I?

But that’s the effect China has on me. I absofuckinglutely adore every single bit of it.

No doubt that statement will have my NZ/Australia/Singapore/HK residencies revoked, so we better move on … haha.

Not that long ago I wrote about a campaign we’ve just done for Delivereasy that reminds me of my beloved Viz ‘adult’ comic.

Well recently I got sent 2 photos of real-life businesses that seem to have adopted a similar approach …

First the most genuine ‘health and fitness’ ad in the history of health and fitness ads:

Quickly followed up by this masterpiece by a global – yet local – painter and decorator:

I love them.

Their magical and memorable.

Arguably more magical and memorable that many campaigns that have had millions and months of time spent on them.

Way back in 2007, I wrote about the power of ‘unplanned thinking‘.

Unplanned is when you go directly at the truth of a product – or audience perception – rather than play into the marketing hype machine. The point was that so many brands had stuck their head so far up their own pretentiousness arses, that rather than create aspiration with audiences, they were creating revulsion.

Unplanned killed that.

More than that, it killed it in a way that was refreshing, invigorating, distinctive and differentiated which – as a byproduct – meant it became more aspirational than an ad claiming a can of sugary fruit juice was in fact, a statement of discernment in a world of choice. Or some other bollocks.

And while I accept the examples above are one-offs, both are delivered in a way where I not just see the truth in them, I see the human in them as well – and as I’ve written a million times – the idea of interacting with real humans is far more interesting and enticing to me than engaging with yet another corporate monotone of a contrived mission statement.

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If Michelangelo And Shakespeare Were A Creative Team …

I am of an age where I read the magnificent Viz comic.

For those who don’t know what that is, it was a highly successful ‘adult’ comic that featured a steady stream of ridiculous characters such as ‘The Pathetic Sharks’, ‘Sid The Sexist’ and ‘Roger Mellie … The Man On The Telly’ and that’s just the ones that are still ‘PC’ enough to name.

But its appeal was far more than just the stories …

Part of its legacy was written through the ‘readers letters’ and ‘ads’ they created and published. A glorious mishmash of bonkeredness and inappropriateness that were always delivered with charm, laughs, mischievousness’ and truth.

A perfect example of this is their iconic tourism campaign for Mabletherpe:

Skegness is fucking shit. Come to Mablethorpe.

I have that as a poster at home and still use it as a perfect example of expressing a clear and powerful point of view. And I’m not even joking.

Anyway, the reason for this write up is because I utterly adore our new Delivereasy work.

Not just because it’s beautiful …

Not just because it continues our fun ‘the outdoors is a bubbling cauldron of danger’ work which we launched a little while ago, celebrating how Delivereasy helps you get takeout without the risk of having to go out …

But because the look and feel of the work feels – at least to me – ‘prime Viz’, and as compliments go, I don’t know if they can go much higher.

Isn’t it lovely?

Add to this that the radio campaign that proceeded this work feels – again, at least to me – similar in spirit to one of my most loved pieces of work [the Diet Tango radio spots, which are so well written, Shakespeare would be jealous] … and you will see why Delivereasy is more than just a business to me, but something much more personal.

Now all I have to do is convince them we could this into a book that’s kinda like an ‘adult’ version of ‘Where’s Wally’ and my career is complete.

Watch this space. Haha.

Talking of space …

I fly to China this weekend.

Well, I do, assuming the doctors give me the green light for my eye this morning – which they didn’t last week so I couldn’t get to Billy’s funeral. Add to that, I woke up this morning to 2 horrible and sad bits of news and not only can I categorically say ‘bad news doesn’t happen in 3’s [as I’m already on 5 for this month alone], I worry karma has decided to visit me, even though I’m not exactly sure what it wants to see me for – haha.

But hey, let’s be positive and assume all goes well … what that means is this blog will be an even bigger wasteland than it normally is as I’ll be gone for all of next week. Mind you, if it doesn’t, it’ll still be quiet because I’ll be pissed off and seething with anger.

Or more likely, disappointment, hahaha.

So while the good people of the Middle Kingdom will have to endure the pain of my presence, you lot – or whoever actually still visits this site anymore – gains from my absence. But not as much as Din Tai Fung are going to gain from having me eat EVERY MEAL at one of their locations.

See you in a week.

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Sometimes The Only Reason Is You Like It More …

We’re surrounded by processes and systems.

Each and everyone proclaiming to be ‘the right way’ to do something.

A way that claims effectiveness … efficiency … accuracy and performance are all but guaranteed.

And while it is true that in many cases, they increase the odds of good things happening … that’s all they do.

Sure, many have a ton amount of data accompanying them to back things what they say … but as we all know about data, when used right [or wrong] you can make it say or prove anything you want it to.

The reality is our industry, pretty much all these systems are less a shortcut to wealth and prosperity, and more an insurance policy against failure and destruction.

Nothing wrong with that other that it does the opposite of what many claim and instead, champions conformity more than liberation. But then what do you expect when many of the people doing the spouting of systems and processes have a vested interest in everyone using those very systems and processes.

Again, I’m not suggesting you ignore all these things. As I said, many play an important role in developing products and brands … however when someone suggests they’re ‘the secret to success’ and must be embraced to the letter – then you need to think about whose success are they really talking about.

It’s why I bloody loved this interview with Marc Andreessen – the businessman, venture capitalist, and [former] software engineer. Specifically the bit about ‘why hyperlinks are blue’.

OK, so he tries to rationalize it at the end, but fundamentally what he says is: “blue is my favorite colour”.

That’s right … the colour of our hyperlinks were chosen.

By a human.

Because he liked that colour.

Kind of reminds me of the ‘wings’ on a Cadillac.

There was absolutely no functional reason for them to exist other than the fact the designers just thought it looked better with them.

That’s it.

And with that, they turned a car into an icon. And here lies a key lesson …

Sometimes, the things we like are simply because we like them.

There may be many alternatives.
There may be other possibilities.
But at the end of the day, some choose things for no other reason than it works for them.

And at a time where everything needs to be justified … rationalised … reviewed and tested … I think those people deserve credit for backing their belief, judgement, vision and preference.

It’s easy to do what a system tells you to do.

It’s easy to follow what others tell you is right.

But it takes confidence to embrace what you believe is the right thing to do. And while I acknowledge some will suggest this approach is an act of ego and arrogance … when you consider how many of these ‘dot-to-dot logic™ systems and ‘researched-to-within-an-inch-of-their-life’ campaigns/brands/products fail to perform [often because the impact or output they create is deemed secondary in importance to the adherence of every step of whatever system or logic process you have committed to using] you could argue the person who backs their judgement is no less an idiot than the person who outsources all their responsibility to someone else?

Whether we like it or not, sometimes the best things are a product of someone doing something they preferred.

They will justify it.

They will rationalize it.

But underpinning it all, is their acknowledgment that before they can think about satisfying others, they need to satisfy themselves … and frankly I find that a pretty honourable act.

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