Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Agency Culture, Attitude & Aptitude, China, Colenso, Comment, Corporate Evil, Creativity, Culture, Distinction, Emotion, Empathy, Management, Nike, Otis, Perspective, Relevance, Resonance, Wieden+Kennedy

Lot’s of companies talk about doing good.
Sadly, of those who do, many have both eyes fixed on what’s in it for them.
A headline.
An award.
A chance to win favour with someone they want to connect with.
An opportunity to distract attention from all the bad stuff they’re doing.
Now there are some companies who mean it.
Who have a set of values that truly is reflected in a set of behaviours.
However, in my experience, I’ve found it’s often more to do with the character of an individual within the organisation rather than the organisation.
Not always, but often.
What I’ve found is the best way to identify the real motivation behind an act of generosity is to see how inconvenient it is for them to execute.
The more inconvenient, the more they care.
I’ve seen some amazing examples of people going out of their way …
There was the time Simon Pestridge – when he was CMO at NIKE – got me a signed Wayne Rooney, Manchester United shirt so I could give it to a random taxi driver I’d met in Atlanta. Or the time San – also from Nike – humoured me by getting me green M&M’s [my attempt at reliving the Van Halen ‘brown M&M trick‘] when they asked me to pull a global preso together at the last second.
That’s proof of people who give a shit about others.
But I’ve seen the other side.
The food brand who ‘donated’ $100 to a group collecting food for victims of an earthquake.
Or the travel company who gave schools a 3% discount for train tickets so city kids could see a beach.
Or the international conglomerate who talk about purpose and their desire to help humanity but continue to profit from cultural exploitation and acts of prejudice.
But where you would normally expect me to leave the post there – with a bad taste in your mouth – I’m not going to.
I know, who the fuck am I?
You see a while back I got asked by Coca-Cola if I’d give a presentation to their Asia-Pac marketing team.
I decided a while back, that I’m going to start ‘exploiting’ my so-called position by trying to do things that can positively change things for more people.
So I told them I’d do it if they agreed to hire a young woman [full-time or a long-term paid internship] who hadn’t gone to university and came from a more humble background.
Then – proving I’m still a selfish, blagging bastard – I said I’d also like some Coke Zero for me.
Amazingly … brilliantly … awesomely they agreed and were nothing but kind and open about making it happen – which also helps explain the photo at the top of this page showing Otis with an outdoor furniture set made of Coke Zero supplies.
They didn’t have to do it.
They could have just asked someone else to do the talk.
But they did … and while there are many things people could throw stones at them for, this was more than many and more valuable than most.
Which leaves me with this …
If you’re asked to do a presentation or a talk or even a panel for someone, maybe you could consider doing a similar thing to me.
Let’s face it, if they would do it for me, they’ll DEFINITELY do it for you.
And if they say no, then you’ll know exactly what you’re dealing with.
But maybe they’ll say yes.
Maybe it won’t be an internship, but it could be something else.
A partnership with a school.
An introduction to one of their partner companies.
Some mentorship.
A donation.
And while it might not change millions of lives, it could change one.
And that is most definitely better than none.
Just a thought.
Thank you Coca-Cola..
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Agency Culture, America, Attitude & Aptitude, China, Colenso, Comment, Communication Strategy, Crap Products In History, Creativity, Culture, Deutsch, LaLaLand, London, Love, Loyalty, Management, New Zealand, Planners, Planners Making A Complete Tit Of Themselves And Bless, R/GA, Shanghai, Teamwork, Wieden+Kennedy
For some reason, I like having badges made for my colleagues.
Or anything a bit daft.
Of course, it started with the stickers I had made when I left Wieden.
600 of the buggers, hidden throughout the office – and buildings of interest – which they’re still finding to this day.
Then there was the packing tape of Jorge and the guy who is in Love Actually – which is a massive compliment even though he thought it was a huge pisstake.
Then there were the Zaid badges, made and bought on a snowy night in Boston.
Then my leaving Deutsch badges.
Followed by the pencils for Mike and Sam.
And the ‘don’t mess with me’ badge for Meg … after watching how disgusted she was at a presentation she had to attend.
Thanks to COVID, apart from the ‘you’re a twat’ sexual harassment badges we had made and sent to men who had made inappropriate comments to women in the workplace, I’ve been nothing but mature.
Until now.
Lizzie is in my team.
She has many qualities.
She’s fiercely smart. An incredibly talented, multi-instrument playing, musician. Community soup maker.
Basically, she is everything I’m not … but there’s one quality that she has that shines above even those bright lights.
She can see a dark side in everything.
I don’t mean in a depressing, mean, nasty way …
Nor do I mean in a hurtful, inconsiderate, selfish way …
I mean that in certain circumstances, she sees the worst case scenario in things.
Of course, she will claim she is simply being a realist – and there is a lot of evidence to suggest she’s right.
For example, when lockdown happened, we were having a bet on when we’d go back to work.
Most said early October, a few early November … but Lizzie swooped in and said,
“We won’t be going back till the new year”.
We laughed at her, until we didn’t and realized she was right.
Again.
Damnit.
Which is why I decided to commemorate her insightfulness with this ….

And while some may say this is not the nicest thing a boss could do for a colleague, I see it a bit differently. To me, I see it as an investment in my team – an investment at the price of my sons inheritance – which means I’m basically boss of the year.
Sadly, that year in 1953.
Happy weekend.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Brand Suicide, Comment, Communication Strategy, Creativity, Culture, Customer Service, Distinction, Emotion, Empathy, Loyalty, Management, Marketing, Marketing Fail, Relationships, Relevance, Resonance, Respect
Just like HR is often about protecting management from their people rather than the other way around, the same can be said for customer service.
Of course, no one says that, but there’s far too many examples of companies stating the importance of their customers, and then using their customer service department to completely undermine them.
As I’ve written before, real customer service is demonstrated when things are bad, not good.
Let’s be honest, when a company can spot a sale, the full charm-offensive is on display.But when things go bad … oh, that’s when the truth is often revealed.
The irony is that this is the exact moment you can create a level of loyalty that can last a lifetime.
I’ve talked about the time VW came good after my brand new Golf GTI had the gearbox collapse and the turbo blow up … and I’ve found another example of a brand making something bad, a little bit better simply because they looked at things from their customers perspective and acted accordingly.

Isn’t that amazing?
Considerate. Compassionate. Personal. Helpful. Generous.
At the worst of times, a company has found a way to not just solve a problem – but help relieve some of the pain, that wasn’t even of their own making.
If a pet food company can do that – with their relatively low priced product – then any company should be able to. But many don’t. Not because their staff don’t want to, but their bosses won’t let them.
Years ago I worked with a consultant called Geoff Burch.
He was a beautiful maniac.
What made him great was he challenged management to live up to their responsibilities – both to their companies reputation and their employees ability to be successful.
We were working on an Italian car brand together and at the client briefing, the CEO said the call centre staff were offering too many benefits to appease dissatisfied customers.
Geoff asked why they were dissatisfied and the response was their were reliability problems.
Quick as a flash, he replied:
“Maybe you need to realise your responsibility to your employees is more than just a desk, a roof and a paycheck, but making a product that is fit for purpose. I can’t help a company who wants to blame others for the faults they have created and protect”
It was incredible.
And while there was a very awkward atmosphere in the room after that outburst, the CEO – after what seemed like a lifetime – acknowledged he was right.
To be fair, it helped that Geoff had an incredible reputation, but he wasn’t saying anything truly revolutionary, he was simply saying ‘reputation is based on what you do, not what you say’.
And while that should be plainly obvious, it’s amazing how few companies still don’t get that. The companies who think making a few dollars more today is more valuable than a lost customer tomorrow.
Seriously, the way some companies operate, it’s like a bloody ponzi scheme.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not suggesting you should ‘spend your way’ into customers hearts.
This is simply about valuing your customers perspective rather than purely seeing the World through your own.
Which is, unsurprisingly, the true definition of customer service.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Agency Culture, Attitude & Aptitude, Comment, Communication Strategy, Context, Creativity, Culture, Drugs, Management, Marketing, Marketing Fail
I know if you’re in the publishing field, times are tough.
I know that you have to resort to attention grabbing tactics to get readers.
But recently Adage – one of our industries most well-known media outlets – did something that was as equally ill-conceived as the time Campaign put Nigel Farage’s shit-eating grin on the cover of their magazine.
What am I talking about? This.

Talk about clickbait.
Blatant, unashamed, clickbait.
And I say that because the actual article was more about what some ‘experts’ were suggesting is happening rather than what the headline was screaming for all its worth.
But that’s not the real issue.
Nor is it the talking about cannabis microdosing … putting aside the fact [1] it’s illegal in some countries and [2] there’s medical evidence to suggest cannabis can have terrible consequences on certain individuals … accepting it is a minority and there are also many benefits, including medical.
Look, I don’t care what people choose of their own freewill – unless, of course, it directly affects the wellbeing of those around them.
I don’t judge, question or degrade those decisions.
My problem is an international industry magazine purposefully chose a headline that communicates if your work environment is causing extreme stress because of the intense pressure being placed on you … then it is on you to deal with it.
YOU.
I literally don’t give a shit if the article was talking about people microdosing, coffee drinking or baked bean eating … they should not be placing the burden of responsibility on the employee, they should be challenging the behaviour, expectations and actions of the company they are working for.
It’s hard enough to attract and retain talent in this industry as it is, without having our industry magazine telling the world, ‘it is a stressful job and it’s on you to deal with it’.
We all make mistakes. I hope they learn from this one.
For their sake. For our sake. For the future of the industries sake.

Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Agency Culture, Attitude & Aptitude, Authenticity, Brand, China, Colenso, Comment, Confidence, Creativity, Culture, Effectiveness, Emotion, Empathy, End of Year, Fulfillment, Goodbye England, Imagination, Jill, London, Management, Marketing, Martin Weigel, Mum, Mum & Dad, My Fatherhood, New Zealand, Otis, Paul, Paula, Resonance, Respect, Rick Rubin, RulesOfRubin, Shelly
So this is it, year 15 of this blog is officially over.
YEAR 15!!!
Christ, this might be the most I’ve ever been committed to anything. What a shame this blog is basically worth nothing, hahahaha.
But we’re here.
A year that the World hoped would represent huge, positive change after the hell of 2020 … but ended up being more of the same.
For us, of course, this was a year with a huge difference – namely we now live in New Zealand.
Moving countries can be a pain in the arse at the best of times, but doing it in a pandemic adds a whole lot of stress that no one needs. However, despite that … despite saying goodbye [or should I say, au revoir] to the beautiful house we had just bought … despite not being able to physically see my beloved Paul and Shelly before we went … despite the hassle, broken furniture and time to get settled in … it’s been amazing.
There’s many reasons to that.
From the 2 week quarantine we had to do, which let us – and Rosie, the cat – get acclimatised to the obscene time difference to the kindness and generosity of the people here. To the fact we had bought our beautiful home – and cars – before we arrived, which made things so much easier. To the covid vaccinations we received. To the community we have found ourselves in. To the outdoor life – excluding the insane rain and 4 month lockdown – we have been able to enjoy.
So much.
But it would be wrong for me to not mention the role Colenso and, specifically my team, have had in it.
Everyone of these talented souls has been wonderful.
Not just to me, but Jill and Otis as well.
Plus there’s the fact my team have [generally] put up with my ‘ways’ … and we all know how painful that can be. I’ve always been incredibly fortunate with the teams I’ve been a part of and this lot are no different.
Sure, they’re mouthy bastards with no end of opinions, ideas and considerations but that’s – as you probably could guess – is exactly why I love them.
We’ve only been together 7 months but I’ve seen enough to be excited about what damage we can do in 2022 – reinforced by the fact we finished this year being named Agency Of The Year by the Effies organisation for a whole host of work that solved problems in interesting ways.
So to Lizzie, Henry, Teresa, Emma, Gi, Augustine, Amy and Liam … thank you for everything.
You’ve given me laughs, headaches, pride, lessons and things to ponder … and I couldn’t be more grateful for all of it.
[And extra best wishes to Lizzie who gets married during the holidays. Made extra perfect because she had to postpone it due to Covid and this way she gets to make the holiday season even more wonderful for all her family]
But while NZ has been the major change in my year, there have been some other notable moments.
In some respects, it was a year of music.
From my Rick Rubin project to getting fired by the Red Hot Chili Peppers to the best passive aggressive endorsement ever seen in the history of mankind.
Given I’ll be working for The Black Keys, Muse and – weirdly – Journey in 2022, I can only hope the musical rollercoaster will keep me on my toes as much.
Talking of celebrity …
I met Noel Edmunds at a business ‘do’ in Auckland – which surprised him as much as it did me – and I got to hug Jacinda Ardern, albeit committing social faux pas when I interrupted her during a dinner she was having to say hello.
That I’m still allowed in the country is testimony to New Zealand’s humanity.
Then there was the Tokyo Olympics …
An event a year late from its original plan … met with global apathy, especially in their home country … only to win us all over and turn us back into fans.
Seeing young kids win medals in skateboarding will stay with me for a very long time.
In fact, having skateboarding in the Olympics may have just done more to get kids wanting to do sport again than any number of NIKE ad campaigns.
That’s how good it was.
Best ad of the year goes to the amazing MacMillan cancer ad.
I must have watched it a couple of hundred times now – hell, I’ve even built a presentation around it that I give clients – and I still cry when I see it.
Not because of sadness – though there’s plenty in it – but because of the human emotion it triggers.
As I wrote at the time, it has this incredible ability to take me back to the times I lost my parents but make me feel closer to them. Extraordinary.
I could go on …
I could talk about certain posts I wrote in the year, like Toxic Positivity, but let’s face it … you can’t be bothered to read it and I can’t be bothered to write about it.
So I want to say some thanks …
To everyone who reads, writes and insults me on this blog … I am eternally grateful – and surprised – you come here. Many of you have been coming here for almost as long as I’ve been writing it and I have to say I find comfort in knowing that whatever I’m facing in life, I can come here and all of it just fades away. So for that, thank you … I really appreciate it.
I also want to say thank you to everyone who has reached out to check on how we’re doing. You didn’t have to, but you did and that means a ton.
Extra special thanks go to Paul, Shelly, Martin, Paula, Amelia, Martin B, Meg, Rach, Mike, Sam, Mr Ji, Peter and Cliff … who all made me feel like you were just around the corner, even though you were thousands of miles away.
And finally, a special thanks to Jill, Otis and Rosie.
None of this would be possible without you and I wouldn’t want to do it with anyone else.
You make me a happier, better person than I believed was possible … and while you may rightfully think I can be a total pain-in-the-ass, I can just tell you I’d be even worsr without you.
So thank you.
For everything,
I can never fully tell you how much I love you and am grateful for you.
The way you handle all this change is extraordinary …
Nothing sums this up more than something Otis chose to do recently.
As you all know, Otis has beautiful, gorgeous, stunning long hair …
Well a few weeks ago, he suddenly announced he wanted to cut it off so it could be donated to kids with cancer.
We asked if he was sure as it was a big thing and he said, “he wants to and is determined to”.
Then he added he will continue to do this until he’s 18.
Grow his hair.
Donate his hair.
Grow his hair.
Donate his hair.
So that evening, his Mum got scissors and a hair razor out and starting cutting 35 CENTIMETERS OF HAIR.
THIRTY FIVE!
Throughout the cutting he kept saying how excited he was.
How it was changing his life.
How much ‘lighter’ his head felt.
And afterwards, the little champ looked like this …
A new sort of rock n’ roll.
I thought it was impossible to love him anymore. I was wrong.
To have the capacity to be so compassionate and considerate at 7 years of age is incredible.
Even more so when he has had so much change in his life.
Four countries in 6 years.
New homes, new schools, new friends.
Almost 18 months of lockdown.
And yet he still has it in him to think of others.
Definitely his Mum’s son.
But proudly mine too.
Hell, he even offered me a chance to remember what it was like to have hair …
… though it could also have been to take the piss out of me.
So to Otis … Jill … Rosie … everyone I know and people I don’t but somehow have still come into my life this year, I wish you a wonderful festive season.
I really, really hope 2022 is much better for everyone than the previous 2 years.
I hope we have a year where everyone can have hope for the future.
I don’t know if it’s possible with the machismo bullshit of politicians, but let’s hope so.
Thank you again for everything, have a great time … just not better than me. Please.
See you on January 31st.