The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]


I Am The Badge Industries Best Customer …
April 16, 2020, 6:15 am
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Agency Culture, Attitude & Aptitude, Comment, Mischief, R/GA

For some weird reason, I like badges.

I should point out I don’t mean I like wearing them … but having them made for me.

And I don’t mean because I’m some sort of egotistical pervert – not typically, anyway – but because I’m a bit of a prick.

In some ways, it all started because of a sticker.

Or should I say 600 of them …

Remember when I left Wieden+Kennedy and hid them throughout the agency and venues where we used to hang out?

That moment of mischief – which is still being discovered – set off a bit of bomb in me and suddenly having customised shit made for my colleagues became a thing.

There was the stickers to the wonderfully talented Jorge – simply because I thought he looked like the handsome actor in the movie ‘Love Actually’.

Then there was the first badge.

For Zaid.

Which I had done because I was experiencing some sort of delusional tiredness at 4am – stuck in a horrible room in a snowed in hotel in Boston.

Then I made stickers for Otis – in his genuine Chinese fighter pilot helmet – before making some more badges for everyone at Deutsch when I left the US.

Of course, when I started at R/GA … I thought the best way to introduce myself to the team was by having a set of stickers made that communicate my philosophy on planning that they can vandalise their slick Apple Macs with.

And then I decided to up my game by having some pencils made.

Initially it was for my R/GA mob … just because I thought it was fun.

Then I decided to be an asshole and get Sam and Mike some individual pencils – all aimed at taking the piss out of Sam, mainly because he is a Spurs fan.

Which leads to this …

A few months ago, the wonderful Megan came to join the team as a connections planner – also known as a comms planner in the industry.

She’s smart, creative and horribly lovely.

Or so we thought.

Because over the weeks, we have seen a new side to Megan reveal itself.

A cheeky bastard, suffer no fools side.

I love it.

Recently we were in a meeting with an another agency and they presented their ‘model for working’.

It was absolute pants, so you can imagine my joy when Megan snorted loudly at it in front of everyone.

Or the guy from a consultancy who had literally repackaged Byron Sharp’s work as his own, but was using it completely out of context.

I turned to see what Megan thought of what he was saying and it was the best ‘disgust’ face I’ve seen in ages.

Hands behind head.

Face looking like it was being violated with the worst smell in the World.

It was quite frankly, wonderful – especially when she uttered the following words …

“So what you’re saying is basically the same as Byron Sharp isn’t it?”

Proud.

So proud I needed to commemorate the event with this …

That’s right, Megan’s own ‘what the fuck is this shit’ face … on a badge.

To be kept forever.

She is so grateful. She just is hiding it well.

Very, very well.


29 Comments

You’re an employment attorneys dream.

Comment by Bazza

And everyone else’s nightmare.

Comment by Bazza

He’s also a tacky giftshop owners saviour.

Comment by Pete

His post title sums it up best.

Comment by George

Doesn’t he have a reputation for being an OK boss? How? I wouldn’t sign that petition and this post should put a nail in it.

Comment by DH

He is going to claim you are only saying that because you never received a personalised badge or pencil.

Comment by George

He wouldn’t be wrong.

Comment by DH

Don’t worry Dave, my reputation is based on all bad stuff … but maybe it’s because I haven’t made badges or pencils for them either. Is that why you are commenting on here in the middle of your night? It’s affected you that much? Hahaha.

Comment by Rob

Where is MY badge?

Comment by DH

I’m still waiting for an answer Rob.

Comment by DH

This is made for you Dave.

https://tinyurl.com/y9a3lldg

Comment by Rob

You just reinforced the point of this post with that comment Rob. Which leaves me to respond with this. “If the badge fits……”

Comment by DH

Was Megan like this before she worked for you or is it the “Campbell influence?”

Comment by Pete

She deserves the badges of appreciation, excellent smack downs.

Comment by Pete

For reasons I won’t bore you with, I never met her during the interviews. I don’t know who that benefited more … her or me.

Regardless, we all thought she was sweetness and light … then she became this even better version. Ha.

Comment by Rob

she must have had the worst fucking shock when she met you. poor fuck.

Comment by andy@cynic

Coincidently, it’s her birthday today.

We just sang her the worst ‘happy birthday’ you’ve ever heard.

And she thought it couldn’t get any worse.

Comment by Rob

Only you reward acts of integrity with acts of cheeky bastardness.

Comment by George

Thank you. I like that. Ha.

Comment by Rob

And only you would take it as a compliment.

Comment by George

Your first line makes you sound like a trainspotter.

Comment by DH

I’ve just read it and as much as I don’t want to agree with you, I have to agree with you.

Comment by Rob

But your third line makes up for it.

Comment by John

he doesnt believe it, hes just been brainwashed into saying it after decades of hearing it from every fucking passerby.

Comment by andy@cynic

you are the most annoying fucking prick.

Comment by andy@cynic

And he revels in it. Which makes him extra annoying prick.

Comment by DH

He doesn’t just revel in it. He invests in it financially. That’s next level prickness.

Comment by Bazza

Checking you are good Robert.
Comments off on your latest post is unusual.
Hope you are all well.

Comment by George

All good mate. Just a tough day yesterday and wanted today to be cheeky bastard free. Especially as the topic I wrote about is especially important to me right now. Thanks for checking in. Speak this weekend.

Comment by Rob




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