The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

Of course I don’t assume anyone will read it – because who reads any of my stuff anyhow – but it is about an important lesson I learned recently and I wanted to document it – for me, if no one else.

So, one of the private clients I work with is worth an inconceivable amount of cash.

As in billions of dollars. Tens of them in fact.

Now I totally agree that having that amount of money is obscene, but what makes it easier – at least for me – is that:

They’re entirely self-made. They’re a true entrepreneur … taking on all the risk, rather than expecting others to cover it. They’re a patron and advocate for creativity. Not just in terms of their business, but creativity as a whole.

And if you think this all reads as being very ‘corporate toady’, you’d be right … because I am most definitely a fan.

But what’s interesting is how they make their money. Or should I say, how they create the conditions to be able to.

A few weeks ago, they asked me if I could fly to another country to meet someone for dinner.

Not just any person, but a bona-fide superstar. And no, I am not being hyperbolic.

Now there’s obviously a backstory as to how I found myself in this situation and why I was asked to do this by my client rather than [1] them or [2] someone more obvious and suitable – and the reason for it is more bonkers than you could imagine – but within a couple weeks, there I was, sitting opposite this world famous star, chatting about life while trying to act like it was all completely normal for me.

Of course, the person in question had done their homework so knew this meeting was legit, but at one point, they asked why I thought they should consider it.

After reinforcing I was the last person they should listen to, I simply said this:

“All I can tell you is everything they’ve done – and do – is built on wanting a long term relationship not a short term, quick-win”.

That was it. That was all I had.

Now there were 2 reasons I explained it this way.

One is because it’s true and the other is I wanted to convey that their ‘business model’ is playing the long game because it would be easy to assume anyone worth that amount of cash must be ruthless in how they operate and that could be very off-putting for someone who values their creative freedom and integrity.

What I mean when I say ‘long game’ is they invest in the individual, rather than ‘short-term opportunities’ … which means they not only are they happy to give the artists/partners the creative freedom – and control – that made them want to work with them in the first place, but they also don’t expect or demand a return on their investment in the shortest time possible because they see this as a relationship that will be measured in years, not projects.

Now, of course, there is method to this ‘modern-business-practice’ madness.

First is they believe that by investing in trust, transparency and relationship consistency, everyone will achieve a much greater return over a much longer period of time. Secondly is they obviously have no problem in knowing how to make money out of what they do so they know they’re not going to lose out being patient. And to top it all off, they’ve done a similar thing with many other high-profile celebrities/partners which – as they are all still engaged and involved years later – kind of proves they mean what they say.

Which leads to the point of this post.

Relationships matter.

I’m not talking about the sort where one person serves the whims and demands of another – which is how a lot of business today operates, especially in adland – but the type where the relationship acknowledges and values the skills, talent and benefits that each person brings to the table.

No short-changing or undermining. No downgrading or threatening. A relationship where the focus is on ‘what we can make create together’ rather than ‘what I you make out of you’.

How refreshing eh?

Except it shouldn’t be … it should be obvious, however thanks to procurement departments and corporate short-termism – we don’t see a lot of it these days.

At best, it’s a quick collab. At worst, its commercial exploitation.

In this case, my client wanted to work with this individual because they believe in them.

They like what they do.
They believe in how they think.
They’re excited by what can be made possible if they enable them to express their creativity at a different scale and through different art-forms than the ones they normally operate in.

But what makes this work is their appreciation of the artists mind.

The vulnerability of the creative process.
The need to explore before you commit.
The acknowledgement that when you try to create something no one has done before, it will fail before it wins.

And they’re there for it.

All of it.

They understand that to get to something great, the first step is to create an environment of encouragement and faith. Not just at the beginning of the process … but ongoing. Over and over again.

That doesn’t mean you pander. Nor does it mean you hold your opinions to yourself. But it does means you start off from a position of true alignment. Not just in terms of what your hopes and ambitions are, but how you want to realise them in terms of approach, expectations and responsibilities. Meaning everything you do comes from a position of shared responsibility and authority.

The other element is they also understand the adage of ‘it’s business, not personal’ is bullshit.

Business is personal.

Always.

The people who try to claim it isn’t are trying to justify bullshit behaviour.

It’s why my client spends a lot of their time connecting and committing to the other person. To make sure they’re not just in it together, but feel it.

Does that make ‘personal’ approach make things challenging at times?

Probably.

However by ensuring transparency and clarity from the beginning of the relationship – they not only build a relationship based on openness and honesty, they ensure the barriers that often get in the way of focusing on doing great things, get removed.

It all makes perfect sense, except we live in times where people choose to ignore it.

Preferring to optimise interactions.

To put themselves in positioning of authority.

To approach the relationship in terms of ‘what I can get out of them for the least amount of effort or loss of power’.

We’ve all met people like that.

Over the years I’ve had a bunch of people I’ve not heard from in years – or [thanks to Linkedin] never heard from in my life – get in contact wanting me to do something for them and I can literally feel the distain when I tell them, “I’m so sorry, I won’t be able to do that for you”.

I should clarify I have always tried to help people who ask for it … especially in terms of advice or a listening ear. However, when their ask is for me to connect them to friends, colleagues or clients for a shortcut to personal gain … unless they’re an old friend or someone I’ve had a long and personal experience of working with/alongside, they can fuck off.

It might sound harsh but I learned this the hard way.

One person in particular did this to me for a few times.

Continually contacting me under the guise of connecting with me but really wanting me to do something for them.

Contacts.
Introductions.
Feedback and advice.

And I did it, until I stopped.

Because I finally realised they were never contacting me for any other reason than to get something from me. They never just got in contact just to say hi. They never told me how my friends/colleagues had helped them. They never got back in touch to ‘ask me’ the questions they claimed they wanted to know – mainly because that was their ruse to get me to help them with other introductions.

I felt a bit stupid it took me so long, but I got there. And I cut them out my life because who needs that toxic shit.

And I get that sounds harsh, but I don’t care … especially as they still tried to use me until when the point they realised I wasn’t going to … so they went on a public rant about me that reinforced their ego, delusion and fragility.

Which gets to the final point of this post …

The word relationship is badly used, mis-defined and treated with ignorant flippancy.

It’s not about interactions or benefits, it’s about generosity, openness, understanding and trust.

You build it over time by investing and putting time into it.

Time to listen, share, discuss, engage, and give a shit.

It’s an act of consistency, equality and consideration … through good and bad.

And while I appreciate in these optimised, maximised, never-stray-from-the-process-or-rules, big-yourself-up-at-all-costs times, that may sound inefficient … but I have first hand proof, it’s much more effective.

In fact, it’s more effective than every marketing guru with their proprietary process/hyped-up, self-serving academic ‘degree’ – can ever imagine, let alone deliver.