The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]


What Do You Call Something That Can Cure Insomnia But Gives You Nightmares And A Terrible Headache At The Same Time?

A few months ago, the lovely James Welch [stupidly] invited me to have a chat about my perspectives on creativity, technology and process.

Why? I have no idea … maybe he was being charitable.

Whatever the reason it ended up – surprise, surprise – being a ramble about why I’m a nightmare to work with, an ‘acquired’ taste and absolutely not an idea megalomaniac.

The good news is only one of these character evaluations came from James … which, on second thoughts, may not be such good news after all.

Anyway, I thought I’d post it …

Not because I have a career death wish, but because if someone out there is finding it hard to sleep, listening to it will help them drift off in no time … albeit having to endure some horrific nightmares along the way.

Not because of what I say – even if some of the perspectives are pretty bleak – but because you’ll hear my dulcet tones saying it.

You can watch it here.

Don’t say I didn’t warn you …

Comments Off on What Do You Call Something That Can Cure Insomnia But Gives You Nightmares And A Terrible Headache At The Same Time?


It Doesn’t Matter How Much You Care About Something If You Hand It To Someone Who Doesn’t Understand It Or Doesn’t Care About …

For 50 years, I never dressed particularly fashionably.

I had a ‘style’, but it was never one people looked at and thought, “I want to dress like that”.

Questionable t-shirts, ripped jeans and a pair of birkies tend to have that reaction.

Part of this is because growing up, I was never exposed to anything ‘fancy’. Despite my Mum being Italian and going to Italy a lot … my version of designer clothing was stuff from Burton’s and C&A and nothing more.

But over the years, I got more and more exposed to the high-end fashion houses.

Projects with Prada and Chanel introduced me to people, stories and experiences that taught me there was far more to who they were than big prices and even bigger pretentiousness. But even that was not enough to convince me this was something for me.

Hell, I still remember the utter shock I felt when I heard a mate tell me they’d spent 70 quid on a t-shirt.

Sure, this was a 1000 years ago, but back then I didn’t know how that was even possible.

T-shirts were 3 for a few quid from Asda so what on earth could justify 70 pounds for a single tee???

And that was how things carried on for decades until 2 events happened in my life:

I got healthy and I started working for the most successful and influential luxury and street-fashion investor on the planet.

And with those 2 things, everything changed …

I got to go behind the scenes of the highest level of the industry.
I got to talk to the creative directors of the houses and labels who define global fashion.
I got to meet the people who create, curate and craft the experiences that define how fashion makes us feel.

But most of all, (1) I could now actually fit in their clothes and (2) my client sent me shitloads of them for free.

Of course, I appreciate how lucky I am for that – and I massively appreciate that they were doing it to ‘keep encouraging me on my health journey’. But – and I say this with utter love and respect for them – I can’t help the real reason is because they didn’t want me turning up to their big meetings and fancy events dressed like a trainwreck. What maybe triggered this was the time I found myself sitting next to Phoebe Philo, ex-creative director of Celine and founder of her own label, who – on seeing my t-shirt, featuring a cat logo – said:

“I love this, who is it by?”

To which I replied:

“My son made it, and that’s our cat”.

To be fair, she was brilliant but I can’t help but imagine she was also thinking, “who the fuck is this nutter I’m next to?”

Bit like the time I was in the lift with members of the Prada family.

They were – literally – the best dressed people I had ever seen in my entire life.

Me? I was wearing ripped jeans, some Nike’s and a hoodie probably from Asda.

Again, they were kind, warm and welcoming – and never once did I feel judged, in fact the opposite – but it was not long after that I started receiving a lot of fancy clothes – hahaha.

But the point of this post is not that I am more fashionably dressed person than I’ve ever been in my life.

Nor is it that I am one of the luckiest bastards on the planet.

No, it’s that the last few years have completely changed my perspective of the industry.

Where once I may have just seen it as pricey and poncy, I now have a deep appreciation, understanding and respect it..

The creativity, the craft, the inspiration, the statements, the history, the details, the obsession.

Put simply, the belief that EVERY detail matters, no matter how big or small.

Steve Jobs once talked about the importance of ‘painting behind the fence’ – the belief that even if no one ever sees or recognizes the care and consideration you have put into your work, you know and that matters – and in many ways, he could have been describing the luxury fashion industry.

You only has to watch the Netflix Documentary ‘7 Days’ – specifically the episode about Chanel’s couture catwalk show – and you’ll see how much thought goes into how every single detail is presented.

Not simply because image is important to them, but because they want to honour the work they have created.

Make sure it is represented, seen and felt exactly as intended and created.

It is a similar approach Metallica have to their music.

It’s why they bought the best vinyl printing plants in the World.
It’s why they invested in the best live concert sound-system in the World.
It’s why they own the rights to all the music they create and have ever created.

It’s not ego. It’s not hyping. It’s about ensuring they honour the work they’ve made so everyone experiences it exactly as intended, versus letting someone else determine that.

So where the fuck is this all going?

Well, it’s because recently I saw this.

Yep, it’s a billboard for the movie Devil Wears Prada 2.

BUT WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON WITH THAT IMAGE???

How is a movie centered around the world of luxury fashion and media using such a badly designed, stretched and distorted billboard like that?!

Looking online, I can tell you that’s not the official image – at least as far as I can tell – plus I should point out the image has accentuated the lines of the digital billboard, which weren’t visible to the human eye.

But that aside, the image used looks like someone at the local distributor, media agency or billboard company decided, for reasons I don’t understand, to create – or adapt – their own version of the official artwork; the result of which is a visual that makes Devil Wears Prada 2 seems more Poundland than Prada.

Which highlights two very important reminders:

1. Everything communicates who you are and what you value.
2. For the best result, make sure all who work for you – or with you –know who you are and what you value.

I’m not saying price or speed doesn’t matter, of course it does … but what price does sloppiness, misunderstanding or a need-for-speed end up costing?

And to those who say that doesn’t matter, because no one cares … I say this in return.

Not only do you not understand marketing …
Not only do you not care about your company …
You sure as shit don’t understand your customers.

Which gives us one final thing to remember …

For all the systems, processes and marketing practice methodologies you can use … if you forget who its for and what its for, then you’re truly wasting your money.

Comments Off on It Doesn’t Matter How Much You Care About Something If You Hand It To Someone Who Doesn’t Understand It Or Doesn’t Care About …


Stubbornly Greedy …

I’ve known Rachel Mercer and Shann Biglione for quite a few years.

I met Shann when we both worked in Shanghai and I met Rach when we both worked at Deutsch – albeit her in NYC and me in LA – and then at R/GA, where she was still in NYC but I’d moved to London.

Though we don’t speak or see each other much, I’ve always been taken by how smart, decent and normal they are, which is why I was thrilled when they started a podcast called ‘The Overthinkers’ – a celebration of those who make the work rather than talk about making the work – and then asked me to be on the very last episode they were going to do together.

Now I must admit I don’t know if the reason I was chosen to be their final guest was because they thought I’d be a good contributor or the person who would ensured it was dead forever – though given we recorded it over a year ago, I suspect the latter. That said, I am not only grateful to them for asking me, I enjoyed it immensely.

The chat was ultimately focused on one key question: ‘when is enough, enough’?’

And while their viewpoints were eloquent and beautifully articulated, I proved – as an only child with immaturity issues – that I was the absolute worst person they could have, and should have, asked.

You can listen to me rambling like a lunatic – covering everything from birth, death, aging, immaturity, babies, parenting and the arrogant pricks of marketing, here – and you can listen to Shann, and his new co-host, Lynette, here.

What a way to start the week.

On the bright side, it can only get better … achieved by listening to any of the other people Shann and Rach had on their podcast.

Comments Off on Stubbornly Greedy …


A Reminder That Covid May Have Revealed The Best Of Humanity And The Worst Of Our Industry …

I was going through some old photos when I saw this …

That’s right, Banana Republic used the pandemic as an opportunity to shame people who were struggling to work from home – while trying to also care for the people in their home, including having to teach their kids their schoolwork – to look better for their work calls.

Oh I know some people will say this was ‘good marketing’ … seizing an opportunity to drive their business at a time where commerce was expected to suffer [when we know the opposite was true] … but it’s not, if anything it’s ambulance-chasing marketing. Where the only consideration is ‘can I make money out of this person, regardless of their situation.

And that’s the thing between good and shit marketing … the knowledge that just because you can, doesn’t mean you should.

The fact they literally call these scarves ‘video chat accessories’ is so overt it’s breath-taking.

And sickening.

But to be fair, they weren’t the only one adopting this ‘strategy’.

I remember a UK-based kitchen company that suggested you should go thousands into debt to have your kitchen ‘updated’ so you can do your future work calls in a room that presented you in a more ‘professional, wealthy, successful light’.

The big problem with a lot of our industry is our disregard for customers.

Actually that’s wrong … it’s our ability to pretend we’re doing everything for our customers.

The reality is though many companies don’t know who their customers are or even what industry they’re in … they simply believe that people – all people – are lining up to buy whatever it is they want to sell, whenever they tell people about it.

I once worked at a place that was obsessed with D2C – direct to consumer.

They were heavily pushing ALL their clients to follow suit … claiming it was what customers wanted, how a modern brand behaved, where retail was heading.

And, to be fair, there was a lot of that happening at the time and they were well placed to leverage it … but I, and more than a few others, weren’t convinced. Mainly because the brands who did it well were very clear on who they were, what they did, who they were for and how long they intended to be around whereas they were trying to force it on organizations who were the antithesis of this. Worse, they were the antithesis of this but were being told that didn’t matter … it was what the future was all about.

I kept bringing this up … highlighting this was not a blanket approach for all and there were serious implications on the brand, customers and category over time. Or at the very least, we shouldn’t be advocating clients let go of all they have done and built and stand-for just so they can exploit a new opportunity for cash.

And I was told I was a dinosaur.
Harking back to a time that was no longer relevant.
That technology was changing everything and they were at the forefront of it.

And while they were a good company, they were lost in their own ego and greed … refusing to look beyond the world they had created, because it was a world that positioned them as visionary rather than acknowledging this was a temporary wave where they were well equipped to benefit from.

Don’t get me wrong, we have to continually innovate.
We have to identify the possibilities, opportunities and waves of change.
But it only works if you know who you are, what you do, who you are for and what they value and want.

It also needs self-awareness, objectivity, honesty and transparency and the realization everything and everyone evolves – regardless what you wish people did.

Which may explain why many of the clients they had, are now brands who are a case-study for what not to do.

A warning that when you think the things that define you, guide you and build you are superfluous, then you can – and probably will – fall for everything.

Just ask Wework.
And Nike.
And The Line.

There’s a big difference between making money and building a business. Sadly, today, few seem to care about what they can become, just what they can get now.

Comments Off on A Reminder That Covid May Have Revealed The Best Of Humanity And The Worst Of Our Industry …


Be More Like Walken …

So I’m back and let’s start the week as I intend to go on. Kinda.

With the obsession of marketing practice, our towns and cities are increasingly being wrapped in advertising that all looks the same – just in different colours.

Doesn’t matter if it’s an ad for a bank, a car, a holiday destination or a cold and flu medicine … everything feels interchangeable, which results in people – ironically – being able to ‘tune them out’ rather than being attracted to how they stand out.

It’s why the thing that is increasingly capturing the attention and creating some sort of differentiation are the ‘walk-in’ signs designed by the people who either own the shops we walk past, or run them.

One of them I saw recently was this:

Is it brilliant? Not really.
It it it clever? A little, but not much.
Does the store have anything to do with Christopher Walken? Not at all.

But I tell you what, it caught my attention, made me smile and made me pay attention to it – and the store it was for – far more than I do with many of the dot-to-dot, paint-by-numbers ads that have been tested to within an inch of their life to ensure the message achieves maximum comprehension, does not – in any way – offend or alienate audiences and hits every category cue, brand ‘asset’ and ‘purchase driver’ to ensure the people behind it can tell their bosses it ‘achieved all the metrics’, even if no one in the real world paid the slightest bit of attention to it whatsoever.

Now don’t get me wrong, I know there’s a world of difference between developing the communication for a major, national/internation brand and doing a ‘walk-in’ sign for a local suburb – but somewhere along the line, we seem to have forgotten the point of ads is to stand out, not blend in which is why it might be a good time to end this post by dusting off this quote by the great Mr Weigel,

‘You can be as relevant as hell and still be boring as fuck’.

Comments Off on Be More Like Walken …