The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]


I’ve Changed, But Not Changed …

So as I wrote a couple of weeks ago, my health situation has had a profound affect on me.

Not just physically, but emotionally.

From actually liking myself a bit to suddenly being interested in clothes – simply because now I feel I have access to choice, whereas before I was left behind by it.

I know that might sound weird for a person who has seemingly only ever worn shorts/jeans, black t-shirts with weird logos on them and Birkenstocks … but while I love those items and still wear those items, I have to acknowledge some of this may have been influenced by their accessibility to me.

But now a whole new world has opened up.

Different shapes, different styles, different colours and different brands.

Admittedly, part of this has been helped by having a client who is the Godfather of Street Culture Fashion and who keeps sending me clothes from the brands he’s started/bought/owns … but maybe, for the first time in at least 3 decades, I not only can explore and experiment with fashion, I want to.

It’s stark, raving, bonkers.

And you know what else is crazy … they’re not too bad on me.

OK, I know I’m never going to be Mr Stylish, but I’m also not Mr Blobby anymore either.

It’s made everyone happier.

Me.
My family.
My friends.
My colleagues.
My clients … especially the fashion lot, who – maybe for the first time – are happy to be seen with me rather than just work with me.

But there’s one item of clothing that has now entered my life that really highlights the impact of this healthier lifestyle.

Again, part of it has been influenced by freebies – which in this case, the copious amount of NIKE’s I’ve been given over the years – but I’ve started buying socks.

FUCKING SOCKS!!! Who the hell am I?

But it gets worse, because they’re not the cheap, ultra-thin, black sock shit from the local supermarket that I’d have grabbed in the past [unless NIKE gave me some] … they’re socks like this:

Yep, designer-ish socks.

OK, so these are sweary socks – or KFC fan socks, depending where you look – but I have loads of different ones. In different colours. With different imagery and messages.

And I bought them.

With my own money.

And why did I do this?

Because – get this – I CAN COLOUR CODE THEM WITH WHAT I’M WEARING.

I find this both sickening and hilarious all at the same time. But I’m here for it, because it is a symbol that I am starting to care about myself in ways I never cared about myself. Not in some desperate need to look stylish – because we’ve already acknowledged I’ll never be that – but to remember than my health has given me choice.

Now I appreciate this sounds stupid.
And I appreciate most people have been this way for decades.
Plus – as a mate recently said – I acknowledge I’ve swapped one daft fashion addiction for another.
But for 53 years, I’ve never had a chance to explore this side of my character and so it’s all new, intriguing and fascinating. At least right now.

Of course it doesn’t mean I’ve ditched the birkies.

Or the jeans/shorts.

Or the black tees with weird logos on them.

It just means they’re more of a choice than a necessity and while there is a disgusting amount of superficiality behind what this has ignited within me, it’s quite an infectious feeling. Which is why I want to thank my family, friends, colleagues and clients for all their support and encouragement on this journey, because I couldn’t have done it without them. I should also thank them for not raising their eyebrows too much at some of the things I am turning up in each day, hahaha.

Hopefully you can tell from how much I’ve written about this subject in the last 4 months, that this has been an incredibly powerful and liberating experience for me. I may muck up in the future, but how I feel because of it is too strong for me to completely forget.

Which is why I can’t work out why health companies have not talked about this benefit in their advertising. Some may have mentioned it – albeit in very contrived and superficial ways – though most tend to either be utterly rational or all about body shape.

Now while I am sure those approaches connect to some audiences, from my perspective the most surprising and enjoyable benefit has been feeling I have been welcomed back into life. That I have choice. That I have a way to explore and express who I am and who I can be.

Or said another way, I get to play dress up, but for adults. And not in a weird way.

Well, not in the weird way some people could read that.

And while that may not sound exciting in words, for those experiencing it, it’s about as uplifting as you can get. Because you’re not just living life, you’re rediscovering it … but with all the experience and lessons from the years before. [But sadly, without the ability to exploit history to make loads of cash … damnit!]

As I’ve said before … should anyone be interested in knowing what I did and how I did it, just let me know. I’m no expert – and I still have a way to go – but I found a way to make it work for me and if it can help you, I will be happy to share.

No judgement. No expectations. And no recommendations on socks. Promise.

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Why Creating The Conditions For Creativity Are As Important As Having The People Who Can Make It …

I’ve always had a love/hate relationship with advertising awards.

Of course, it’s nice to have them … but for me, it’s always about who you are competing against and who the judges are who are deciding them.

Oh, and whether those who have won before, won with real work or ‘ultra-niche, ultra-limited edition’ one-offs.

Also known as scam.

You generally can tell when that shit happens because they tend to either:

1. Be a one-off from the clients normal approach to work.
2. Be a one-off from the normal output of the agency.

Fortunately, it is less than it used to be, but still more than it should.

That’s why the agencies who do it properly deserve more credit.

To win awards as a byproduct of the work you make rather than it be the focus of the work you make, is a noble cause.

There’s more of them than we often give credit for … and you can generally tell who they are by how long they’ve been able to play at that level.

A few years ago, I wrote about how W+K and BBH were brilliant examples of this.

How they proved the old adage ‘it’s easier to get to the top than to stay there’.

And it’s so true.

Because without wanting to take anything away from anyone who does well, being able to do it consistently is an even greater achievement.

I say this because I think Colenso is one of these places.

For over 50 years, we’ve consistently made work that has been recognised by the best in the world as some of the best in the world.

NZ has tended to do very well in this area … DDB, Saatchi, Special to name a few … but few have done it with the longevity and sustainability of Colenso.

And a big part of that is because of the culture it cultivates.

From our approach to the work we make to the people we hire to make it … at the heart of everything is a deep love and respect for the power of creativity.

Lots of people will say that.
Lots of agencies will say that.
But you find out who means it through the work that they consistently make.

And that is – like all the places who consistently do good stuff – one of the traits that reveal who we really are.

That doesn’t mean we’re the easiest place to work.

Because even though the place is full of good and talented creative people … it’s also a challenging, demanding, opinionated and provocative environment, because ultimately, we have 50+ years of standards and expectations to honour, live up to and try to push further.

As the picture at the top of this page – from 934843049 years ago – shows.

But what’s interesting is how we want those standards and expectations to manifest.

Because it’s not about playing to be accurate, it’s about doing the right thing in the most interesting, original and audacious ways.

Do we always get it right?

Nope.

But we always strive to get it right and that’s why we are consistently awarded at the highest level for work as varied [and effective] as turning beer into an alternative fuel for cars, creating a radio station for dogs, getting Rick and Morty to explain green energy to youth culture and making a radio campaign that doubled as an outdoor campaign that asked New Zealand to make a radio campaign … to name but a very few.

And while this post sounds unbelievably corporate toady … it’s my way of paying homage to my colleagues and, especially, my partners.

Now I could wax lyrical about Si – our CCO – because he’s not just horribly talented, he is possibly the nicest human I’ve ever worked with.

[Well, I say nice, but he has his moments of evil – but even then, he manages to deliver it with a niceness that makes every Disney character look like a bunch of pricks]

But the reality is, you’d expect the leader of Colenso to be brilliant … otherwise why the hell are they here.

Which is why who I really need to acknowledge is our MD – Ange – because she’s the Ringmaster of the whole Colenso circus.

It can’t be easy.

Not just because she has to deal with me – let alone sit next to me – she also has to work with a bunch of people thinking up ridiculous ideas that challenge and confront on every level.

Not just creatively … but in terms of time, simplicity and possibility.

Yet she manages it.

More than that, she would fight for the death to maintain it.

Which is why the thing that is often forgotten about the agencies who consistently make great work is not just the people behind it … but the people who make it possible.

The people who create the conditions for it to thrive.

From the MD’s and finance people to the IT and support staff.

But – and here is the critical thing – it’s more than them just doing their job well, it’s them doing their job through the lens of what the whole company is striving to do.

Because to paraphrase that famous story of the janitor who met President Kennedy

They’re not working in a vacuum, immune from the needs and ambitions of everyone around them… they’re helping make the most audacious ideas get out the door.

Here’s to all of them. Every last fucking one of them.

With that, the first month of ’24 is done. And I can tell you, I’m as surprised as anyone that I decided to finish it in such an earnest, generous way.

Let’s hope February is less nice. Even I feel sick with it.

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If You Need To Sleep This Weekend, Let Me Help You …

Late last year, the silver-tongued man with the honey voice – that’s Fergus of OnStrategy fame, if you were wondering – asked if we could do a podcast about our work with our latest client, Delivereasy.

I’ve always steered away from talking about work I’m a part of because – for all my ego – I don’t like the idea one person becomes the spokesperson for it. Especially a strategist. However on this occasion, I changed my mind … not just because it was Fergus doing the asking – and no one can say no to him, including Putin, probably – but the story behind how we ended up working together is funny and definitely about me.

Or said another way, about my inability to be professional.

And while the work we’re doing together has only just started … it’s already setting the foundation and tone for something special.

From the new logo we designed that had 17 members of the company tattoo it on themselves [Including one of the founders who had 1.5 million people watch it on TikTok resulting in him sitting next to someone on a plane from China, who recognised him because of it]

To promising the coach of the All Blacks a curry and naan bread every week if he brought back the Rugby World Cup to New Zealand./ [Which we downgraded to just a curry because he failed, ahem!]

To a bunch of ridiculous ads like the one above …

But better yet, there is sooooo much coming.

Mad, ridiculous and brilliant stuff.

And while I would say that, the reality is that with our situation, we know the only way we can win is to outsmart the competition rather than outspend them.

But what’s interesting is that while this approach is founded on a strategically sound argument, it can only happen when your client understands it as well as the implications of it.

And in this case, they do.

Not just strategically. But also in terms of the ambition we have for each other and what we want/need the work to be to help us get there.

Truth over harmony.
Transparency over power.
Trust over control.

The reason I’m telling you this is because you can hear what a great client sounds like by listening to the podcast.

Sure you’ll have to put up with me, but in the case of listening to Jean … you’ll definitely leave with a better taste in your mouth.

Have a great weekend and happy invasion, I mean Australia Day.

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I’m Not Quite Half The Man I Used To Be, But I’m Definitely Less …

Back in November of last year, I wrote about how I was eating healthy.

It was quite a big thing for me to talk about – which is weird, given I have absolutely no problem writing about death, unemployment or the size of my best friends appendage, to name but a few of the subjects I’ve waxed lyrical about that many smarter people would rather shut-up than share.

But since then, more things have happened and while I genuinely feel uncomfortable to write it, I am also quite proud of myself, so here we go.

You see what happened was back in August, my doctor asked me to spend 3 months focusing on my health. To try and retrain my habits. To make different choices about my diet. To see what might happen by doing it.

And while I’ve been a helpless – and willing – slave to the seductive powers of pasta and sugar for basically my whole life … I decided this was the time I was going to go all in.

So I did.

65g of carbs a day. 25g of sugar a day. 1700 calories a day.

Every day.

And while it was hard at first, once I knew what I could do – and eat – it was satisfying. Well … more satisfying than I imagined. And that only grew when the results of those first 3 months came in.

I’d lost 22kg.
I’d dropped 4 sizes in clothes.
I saw every one of my health measures hit ‘healthy’.
My doctor called to ask if I was OK as the results were so extreme, he thought either the original results were inaccurate or I was doing a different sort of damage to myself.

[For the record, he was wrong on both counts – I was just in a very intimate relationship with chicken and spinach]

And as good as all that was – and it was very good – the biggest change was that I have started to like myself for the first time in a long time.

Yes, I appreciate that sounds tone deaf and dramatic given there are people who face real challenges and problems, whereas I have an amazing family, a wonderful life and lifestyle and a rewarding and fulfilling job … but it’s true.

In my defence, I didn’t really realise it until I started coming out the other side. Mainly because I think the impact was over time … slowly but surely, bit by bit … until at some point, it found a way to settle permenantly just under my surface.

And while it only popped up to mess with me at certain times and moments – and I suspected what may be behind it all – it is only recently that I was able to confirm my concerns about my health, maybe more than my actual health, was the cause of it.

Or should I say, the concerns about my sub-optimal health.

Just to be clear, what I’m talking about is self-esteem.

God it’s a weird thing.

It’s in your power and yet you’re also powerless to it and I felt I was in its grip.Putting me in a corner that I didn’t think I could get out of so I adapted my ways and choices to try and counteract it, without realising I was just giving it more power over me in more ways.

Which is why as I have got more in control of my health, I have felt a bit of a rebirth.

A bit more confidence about what I can do.

A bit more happiness about who I am.

From the superficial to the deeply, deeply personal.

Part of this is because I’m now wearing smaller sized clothes than I have in literally decades and I’m almost ashamed at how much that has affected me. Of course, it’s also bankrupting me as I have to basically buy new t-shirts that no longer look like I’m wearing a man tent dress … but it has changed more than just the size, but what I choose. Because frankly, more things are now available to me and so I’m experimenting with clothes like I’m a 10 year old kid. Well, I say experimenting, but it really has come down to a few t-shirts in colours that aren’t black and some socks [which is, let’s be honest, already a shock given my Birkenstock obsession] in a range of ridiculous colours. Fuck, I even colour coded my t-shirt and socks once … something never ever done in my life. And – to be honest – never to be done again.

But it is in terms of my family that I am the most indebted.

Because I’ve likely increased the time I’ll be here for my wife and son.

OK, so there wasn’t a identified risk that was going to cut it short … but health is always going to make it last longer and that means everything to me.

Because I love my family.

Love every little thing about them.

Of course they can annoy the fuck out of me, but I am sure I am far worse to them – even though this shocks me as I’m obviously a saint.

But as my son is just 9, I want to be around for as long as I can. I want to see the life he builds, I want to be there for the choices he wants to make. I want to just be in his life and have him in mine for as long as possible. With my wonderful wife by my side. Building new adventures and sharing them. Together.

Now I appreciate that all sounds very Hallmark card … but I do, that’s maybe all I want in some ways … and I’d be denying the truth if I said I hadn’t wondered if this was going to be as possible as I hoped it would be.

And yet … I felt it was an impossible situation to change.

I wanted it.

I knew what could help it.

But I didn’t have the skills or the energy or the willpower. Always having an excuse why I couldn’t dedicate the time and energy to it. Which is mad given I have a fuck-ton of energy and willpower to do a bunch of other stuff … but I had convinced myself that I’d met my match and so that affected me deeply in my head. Loving my family but not knowing how to make sure that love could be around for longer.

I know, it sounds pathetic, but I bet I am not the only one who has faced this psychological prison. And just to be clear, it’s not that I hadn’t tried things to change it. I had. And failed … over and over again. Which not only made me feel a bit more shit about myself, but also convinced myself I was not going to win this battle.

Which is why the pride Otis has in what I’ve done that makes me almost cry with joy. And what breaks my heart is that he obviously had the same worries about how long I’d be around. Not overtly. Not daily. But he tells me how proud he is of me and how happy he is I’m ‘healthy’ … and so while no one knows when the ‘end day’ will come, removing some of the more blatant concerns that it could be sooner than you hope, is a psychological gift in itself.

Now I am not going to say if I can do it, anyone can.

I couldn’t do it for 53 years and you don’t have to be healthy to be happy.

I hate that attitude.

And I was happy … I’m just saying I’m happier now.

With myself.

Of course, that doesn’t mean I don’t have issues – I do, bloody loads of them – but it means I have less than I’ve been carrying, which is nice.

In fact, as of today, I have 30kg less problems I’m carrying – ha.

But let’s not ignore the reality that doing this is really fucking hard – especially at the start – and I needed a Doctor to basically scare me into it and needed to actively choose to not make excuses for not sticking with it. Which is why if anyone resonates with my story and wants to chat about their situation – or what I did to try and get out of it – then just get in touch and I’ll listen and share.

While there is a conscious mental decision to be made, at its heart it’s simply about food choices and portion choices. Oh, and investment … both in time and – sadly – money.

Because it’s a privilege to be able to do this, because – ironically – eating less costs more. Or it does if you want to make it easier.

But the good news is there’s choices that actually are good … and you’re talking to someone who thinks kebab and chips is fine dining. So if you want to know more, I’ll tell you what worked for me and how I did it and then you can decide what’s right for you.

Which leaves me to say a huge thanks to my family, doctor, clients, colleagues and whoever the fuck invented 99% sugar free buffalo sauce … because they made this happen. They made this possible,

And while I may fuck up occasionally, I now know I won’t fuck up every single mealtime and that’s a win in my book, because this journey has taught me things about myself and my habits that have been a revelation.

In fact the only thing I am disappointed about is I’ve still not used the overpriced bloody treadmill I bought. Though I’m glad I got the cool, foldable, wifi and bluetooth enabled one … which means there’s some things about me that will never change.

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It Doesn’t Matter If They Don’t Know, It Matters That You Do …

Over the years I’ve written a lot about the importance of craft.

About taking pride in doing the right thing, not the easiest.

Sweating the details, not just the obvious stuff.

Caring about how you do something as much as what you do.

And yet, despite so many companies talking big about how they’re a ‘premium brand’, it is amazing how a closer inspection, their actions and values reveal something else.

At least where craft is concerned.

Instead, everything they do is evaluated purely by their ability to design, manufacture and scale down to a price point rather than up to a definitive and differentiated standard.

It’s like their attitude is craft is vanity, cost is sanity.

And while the cost element is important, the irony is craft attracts profit, rather costs it.

Even more ironic is that it can do this without needing to make a big deal out of it … because to the people behind it, it’s not a big deal. For them, it’s simply about living up to the standards their brand deserves/expects through the professionalism and passion they live by.

Now I appreciate that may sound – at best – counter-intuitive and – at worst – pretentious as fuck. But the reality is that to the people who buy what they make, they can sense it.

And I say ‘sense’ because sometimes it’s literally a feeling.

A feeling everything has been deliberate, considered and fussed over.

It might be the materials.
Or it might be the packaging.
It may even be a tiny detail they don’t even see until someone else notices it.

A great example of that last point is this from PlayStation.

I love this.

I love it with all my heart.

Many would never know it. Many may not even feel it.

But when they eventually discover it … it will change how they feel about it.

Reinforcing what makes this brand special. How much it cares about standards. And who it is.

But even if that doesn’t happen, it is OK.

Because often this is not done to benefit the end customer, but to satisfy the values and standards of the creator.

And far too often, that attitude is viewed as an indulgent expense when the reality is, it’s the greatest investment you can make in helping create who you can become.

Which is why Steve Jobs talked about the importance of ‘painting behind the fence’.

Or in the case of Playstation, texturing behind the controller.

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