Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Agency Culture, Attitude & Aptitude, China, Colenso, Comment, Corporate Evil, Creativity, Culture, Distinction, Emotion, Empathy, Management, Nike, Otis, Perspective, Relevance, Resonance, Wieden+Kennedy

Lot’s of companies talk about doing good.
Sadly, of those who do, many have both eyes fixed on what’s in it for them.
A headline.
An award.
A chance to win favour with someone they want to connect with.
An opportunity to distract attention from all the bad stuff they’re doing.
Now there are some companies who mean it.
Who have a set of values that truly is reflected in a set of behaviours.
However, in my experience, I’ve found it’s often more to do with the character of an individual within the organisation rather than the organisation.
Not always, but often.
What I’ve found is the best way to identify the real motivation behind an act of generosity is to see how inconvenient it is for them to execute.
The more inconvenient, the more they care.
I’ve seen some amazing examples of people going out of their way …
There was the time Simon Pestridge – when he was CMO at NIKE – got me a signed Wayne Rooney, Manchester United shirt so I could give it to a random taxi driver I’d met in Atlanta. Or the time San – also from Nike – humoured me by getting me green M&M’s [my attempt at reliving the Van Halen ‘brown M&M trick‘] when they asked me to pull a global preso together at the last second.
That’s proof of people who give a shit about others.
But I’ve seen the other side.
The food brand who ‘donated’ $100 to a group collecting food for victims of an earthquake.
Or the travel company who gave schools a 3% discount for train tickets so city kids could see a beach.
Or the international conglomerate who talk about purpose and their desire to help humanity but continue to profit from cultural exploitation and acts of prejudice.
But where you would normally expect me to leave the post there – with a bad taste in your mouth – I’m not going to.
I know, who the fuck am I?
You see a while back I got asked by Coca-Cola if I’d give a presentation to their Asia-Pac marketing team.
I decided a while back, that I’m going to start ‘exploiting’ my so-called position by trying to do things that can positively change things for more people.
So I told them I’d do it if they agreed to hire a young woman [full-time or a long-term paid internship] who hadn’t gone to university and came from a more humble background.
Then – proving I’m still a selfish, blagging bastard – I said I’d also like some Coke Zero for me.
Amazingly … brilliantly … awesomely they agreed and were nothing but kind and open about making it happen – which also helps explain the photo at the top of this page showing Otis with an outdoor furniture set made of Coke Zero supplies.
They didn’t have to do it.
They could have just asked someone else to do the talk.
But they did … and while there are many things people could throw stones at them for, this was more than many and more valuable than most.
Which leaves me with this …
If you’re asked to do a presentation or a talk or even a panel for someone, maybe you could consider doing a similar thing to me.
Let’s face it, if they would do it for me, they’ll DEFINITELY do it for you.
And if they say no, then you’ll know exactly what you’re dealing with.
But maybe they’ll say yes.
Maybe it won’t be an internship, but it could be something else.
A partnership with a school.
An introduction to one of their partner companies.
Some mentorship.
A donation.
And while it might not change millions of lives, it could change one.
And that is most definitely better than none.
Just a thought.
Thank you Coca-Cola..
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Agency Culture, America, Attitude & Aptitude, China, Colenso, Comment, Communication Strategy, Crap Products In History, Creativity, Culture, Deutsch, LaLaLand, London, Love, Loyalty, Management, New Zealand, Planners, Planners Making A Complete Tit Of Themselves And Bless, R/GA, Shanghai, Teamwork, Wieden+Kennedy
For some reason, I like having badges made for my colleagues.
Or anything a bit daft.
Of course, it started with the stickers I had made when I left Wieden.
600 of the buggers, hidden throughout the office – and buildings of interest – which they’re still finding to this day.
Then there was the packing tape of Jorge and the guy who is in Love Actually – which is a massive compliment even though he thought it was a huge pisstake.
Then there were the Zaid badges, made and bought on a snowy night in Boston.
Then my leaving Deutsch badges.
Followed by the pencils for Mike and Sam.
And the ‘don’t mess with me’ badge for Meg … after watching how disgusted she was at a presentation she had to attend.
Thanks to COVID, apart from the ‘you’re a twat’ sexual harassment badges we had made and sent to men who had made inappropriate comments to women in the workplace, I’ve been nothing but mature.
Until now.
Lizzie is in my team.
She has many qualities.
She’s fiercely smart. An incredibly talented, multi-instrument playing, musician. Community soup maker.
Basically, she is everything I’m not … but there’s one quality that she has that shines above even those bright lights.
She can see a dark side in everything.
I don’t mean in a depressing, mean, nasty way …
Nor do I mean in a hurtful, inconsiderate, selfish way …
I mean that in certain circumstances, she sees the worst case scenario in things.
Of course, she will claim she is simply being a realist – and there is a lot of evidence to suggest she’s right.
For example, when lockdown happened, we were having a bet on when we’d go back to work.
Most said early October, a few early November … but Lizzie swooped in and said,
“We won’t be going back till the new year”.
We laughed at her, until we didn’t and realized she was right.
Again.
Damnit.
Which is why I decided to commemorate her insightfulness with this ….

And while some may say this is not the nicest thing a boss could do for a colleague, I see it a bit differently. To me, I see it as an investment in my team – an investment at the price of my sons inheritance – which means I’m basically boss of the year.
Sadly, that year in 1953.
Happy weekend.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Brand Suicide, Comment, Communication Strategy, Creativity, Culture, Customer Service, Distinction, Emotion, Empathy, Loyalty, Management, Marketing, Marketing Fail, Relationships, Relevance, Resonance, Respect
Just like HR is often about protecting management from their people rather than the other way around, the same can be said for customer service.
Of course, no one says that, but there’s far too many examples of companies stating the importance of their customers, and then using their customer service department to completely undermine them.
As I’ve written before, real customer service is demonstrated when things are bad, not good.
Let’s be honest, when a company can spot a sale, the full charm-offensive is on display.But when things go bad … oh, that’s when the truth is often revealed.
The irony is that this is the exact moment you can create a level of loyalty that can last a lifetime.
I’ve talked about the time VW came good after my brand new Golf GTI had the gearbox collapse and the turbo blow up … and I’ve found another example of a brand making something bad, a little bit better simply because they looked at things from their customers perspective and acted accordingly.

Isn’t that amazing?
Considerate. Compassionate. Personal. Helpful. Generous.
At the worst of times, a company has found a way to not just solve a problem – but help relieve some of the pain, that wasn’t even of their own making.
If a pet food company can do that – with their relatively low priced product – then any company should be able to. But many don’t. Not because their staff don’t want to, but their bosses won’t let them.
Years ago I worked with a consultant called Geoff Burch.
He was a beautiful maniac.
What made him great was he challenged management to live up to their responsibilities – both to their companies reputation and their employees ability to be successful.
We were working on an Italian car brand together and at the client briefing, the CEO said the call centre staff were offering too many benefits to appease dissatisfied customers.
Geoff asked why they were dissatisfied and the response was their were reliability problems.
Quick as a flash, he replied:
“Maybe you need to realise your responsibility to your employees is more than just a desk, a roof and a paycheck, but making a product that is fit for purpose. I can’t help a company who wants to blame others for the faults they have created and protect”
It was incredible.
And while there was a very awkward atmosphere in the room after that outburst, the CEO – after what seemed like a lifetime – acknowledged he was right.
To be fair, it helped that Geoff had an incredible reputation, but he wasn’t saying anything truly revolutionary, he was simply saying ‘reputation is based on what you do, not what you say’.
And while that should be plainly obvious, it’s amazing how few companies still don’t get that. The companies who think making a few dollars more today is more valuable than a lost customer tomorrow.
Seriously, the way some companies operate, it’s like a bloody ponzi scheme.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not suggesting you should ‘spend your way’ into customers hearts.
This is simply about valuing your customers perspective rather than purely seeing the World through your own.
Which is, unsurprisingly, the true definition of customer service.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Agency Culture, Attitude & Aptitude, Comment, Communication Strategy, Context, Creativity, Culture, Drugs, Management, Marketing, Marketing Fail
I know if you’re in the publishing field, times are tough.
I know that you have to resort to attention grabbing tactics to get readers.
But recently Adage – one of our industries most well-known media outlets – did something that was as equally ill-conceived as the time Campaign put Nigel Farage’s shit-eating grin on the cover of their magazine.
What am I talking about? This.

Talk about clickbait.
Blatant, unashamed, clickbait.
And I say that because the actual article was more about what some ‘experts’ were suggesting is happening rather than what the headline was screaming for all its worth.
But that’s not the real issue.
Nor is it the talking about cannabis microdosing … putting aside the fact [1] it’s illegal in some countries and [2] there’s medical evidence to suggest cannabis can have terrible consequences on certain individuals … accepting it is a minority and there are also many benefits, including medical.
Look, I don’t care what people choose of their own freewill – unless, of course, it directly affects the wellbeing of those around them.
I don’t judge, question or degrade those decisions.
My problem is an international industry magazine purposefully chose a headline that communicates if your work environment is causing extreme stress because of the intense pressure being placed on you … then it is on you to deal with it.
YOU.
I literally don’t give a shit if the article was talking about people microdosing, coffee drinking or baked bean eating … they should not be placing the burden of responsibility on the employee, they should be challenging the behaviour, expectations and actions of the company they are working for.
It’s hard enough to attract and retain talent in this industry as it is, without having our industry magazine telling the world, ‘it is a stressful job and it’s on you to deal with it’.
We all make mistakes. I hope they learn from this one.
For their sake. For our sake. For the future of the industries sake.

Filed under: Attitude & Aptitude, Comment, Crap Marketing Ideas From History!, Creative Development, Creativity, Culture, Egovertising, Embarrassing Moments, Management, Marketing, Marketing Fail
OK, so the heading on this post is decidedly fake news … but you will be ecstatic to know it is the last week of this blog for 2022.
Better yet, because NZ has quite long Christmas holidays, it will be the last post until Jan 31st – albeit with a post on Jan 16th to commemorate 23 years since my Dad passed away.
So after this week, you get about 6 weeks of blog post freedom.
Talk about ending 2021 and starting 2022 on a high …
I know, you’re welcome.
But it’s not all good news as you still have to get through this week of blog posts PLUS they’re going to be full of sentimentality, so you’ll probably need 6 weeks to recover from them.
That said, I’m not a total beast, so I’ll gently throw you in to the big, pile of steaming vomit and because of that, today’s post is about this …
Yep, Norton – the anti-virus people – sent me an email about their new logo.
Their new logo that looks almost identical to their old logo, except …
1. Replacing N with n.
2. Using a solid ‘tick’, instead of the weird graphic one.
3. Changing the orange ring, to a yellow one.
4. All placed on a white background instead of a black one.
And while having four differences could indicate some big changes, this doesn’t.
On face value, people would probably not notice any change at all … which is maybe why Norton – I mean, Norton – sent the email out.
So we’d know, because otherwise we wouldn’t know.
Which makes you ask why do the name change in the first place … or why send an email about it to people who literally don’t give a shit.
I mean, what do they expect me to do?
Suddenly buy their entire suite of anti-virus products?
Or try and buy a t-shirt with their new logo emblazoned on the front of it?
Or possible just buy them as Christmas presents for friends and family?
I’m happy Norton are happy with their non-change, logo change.
I’m chuffed they still take some pride in their appearance after all this time.
I’m thrilled they don’t mind paying a couple of mill for minute changes.
I’m ecstatic they’re so easily pleased and must be a dream to buy presents for.
[read: $10 gift voucher from the local hardware shop].
But frankly, I buy their software to stop me getting this sort of corporate virus email, so please Norton, pull yourself together and don’t bother me with this sort of rubbish again.
Thanks.