Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, America, Anniversary, Context, Culture, History, Politics, Prejudice, Racism
So even though Trump has basically banned DE&I, I feel it is important that today – given its July 4 – is a day where I point out that while lots of Americans are going crazy celebrating their freedom from the Brits, it’s a day that is only relevant to part of America, not all.
As if anyone needs reminding … Independence Day is a white American celebration, and given the way the current administration are behaving to anyone who is not white – regardless of their heritage, parentage or passport – it’s not something that should be celebrated as a universal, national holiday. If they want that, then it should be June 19.
You can find out why here … but I just can’t understand how a nation can celebrate freedom when they know only some were free. Worse, a nation who loves to promote its Christian values and yet operates – and votes for – the most un-Christian behaviors you could get.
What bothers me most is the US – despite its current issues – is a pretty awesome country.
I also appreciate the role the day has in their national calendar, however given it prides itself on being ‘the land of the free’, it would be wonderful if they lived up to that label rather than down to a stained tradition.
Have a good weekend.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Age, Agency Culture, Apathy, Aspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Authenticity, Creative Development, Creativity, Culture, Delusion, Distinction, Diversity, Emotion, Inclusion, Love, Loyalty, Management, Marketing, Mum & Dad, Planners, Politics, Prejudice, Provocative, Relevance, Reputation, Resonance, Respect
I can’t believe next week we enter the final month of 2024.
How the hell did that happen?
My god, it’s been a whirlwind and while I’ll write my annual ‘wrap-up’ post in a few weeks, I have to say – bar three truly tragic events for me – a pretty good year.
I don’t take any of that for granted.
I know it could all fall apart in an instant.
Which may explain why I follow certain theories/behaviours/beliefs that – despite knowing they’re likely utter nonsense – help me feel I’m doing things that encourage ‘good stuff’ to happen for me and my family.
Or should I say, ‘extend’ the good stuff that my family get to enjoy.
That’s right, I’m talking about certain superstitions that I follow.
I won’t go into them in detail for fear of the men in the white suits popping around to put me in a jacket with no sleeves, but on top of working hard, doing what I promise and staying interested and open to stuff … they heavily influence and drive my actions and behaviours in equal measure.
Now I should point out the driving force of this is less about maintaining an income [though that is there, of course] and more about satisfying my curiosity and hunger.
You see, despite being 54, I’m still fiercely ambitious and hungry to do new, exciting and good things. In fact – given the stuff I’ve been fortunate to do over the past few years with moving countries and working with artists in the music, fashion and gaming industries – even more ambitious and hungry than I’ve ever been.
Of course I appreciate I’ve done a bunch of stuff but as I’ve written before, the more I do … the more I discover things I want to do. The problem is, the older you get, the more you know you won’t be able to do everything and so you want to try and ensure your time is spent on the stuff that fulfils you rather than drains you.
I get some people may read this and think I’m a fucking idiot. And I get it … because the basic narrative that is pushed out is the older you get, the less passion you have.
Hell, companies have used that as an excuse to get rid of experience for decades.
Worse, for a long time I believed that view too …
But what I’ve learned is that in many cases, it’s not the passion that gets tired, but the tolerance for bullshit.
The politics.
The processes.
The procedures.
The shiny-new-things.
The hang-on-to-the-old-things.
Corporate bullshit is endless.
And while I’m not suggesting people actively enjoy subjecting you to it – nor am I claiming all of it is pointless – I understand why so many people choose to walk away from it.
Which is all my way of saying how fortunate I consider myself …
Because while I have faced a bunch of bullshit in my time, the vast majority of my career has been working for – or with – people/companies and brands who value the work more than the politics. Who choose creativity over complicity. Who value what you do rather than devalue how old you are.
And that means at 54, the bullshit hasn’t won.
It may one day, but it hasn’t yet.
And that means I don’t just get to keep working with talent regardless of age, heritage, geography or discipline. Nor just get to learn, collaborate and create with people from all walks of life and from all fields of creativity – united by our desire to make something really fucking good, rather than something ‘good enough’. It means I get to keep enjoying it … being inspired by it and bringing my own energy and creativity to it.
So while there’ll be people out there who’ll make more money, have more things, possess bigger job titles or career positions than I’ll ever have … and while there may well come a time where the possibilities I see will be possibilities someone else has to realise … I can feel I beat the bullshit.
And while many won’t understand that.
Or even agree with that.
For a kid whose parents instilled in him the importance of living a life of fulfilment rather than contentment, it means that should I ever get to meet Mum and Dad again, I can thank them for teaching me stubbornness isn’t a fault, when done right, it’s an enduring gift.
Filed under: Agency Culture, Apathy, Attitude & Aptitude, Black Lives Matter, Comment, Complicity, Creative Development, Creativity, Culture, Diversity, Environment, Prejudice
Robin Bonn recently talked to me about what I’d learned about diversity from having lived in so many countries.
To be honest, I was quite apprehensive to do it as I wouldn’t want to suggest I have all the answers or I’m doing it well … however the issue of talent diversity, or more specifically, hiring, championing and elevating People of Colour is nowhere as prominent as it was – or it should be – which is why I agreed to do it.
Not because I have any influence over the industry, but I have real anger about it.
More than that, I feel I have a responsibility for making up for not doing enough, sooner.
And while there’s stuff I am continuing to learn – and stuff I believe – there’s 3 things that I’m absolutely certain about:
1. When you open your eyes, you will see talent literally everywhere.
[and if they don’t come, that says more about how you operate and have acted than them]
2. You need to be impatient and stubborn about making things happen
3. Take personal responsibility for stuff rather than wait/rely on a corporate policy to do it.
As I said, I feel very conscious that as a privileged white male who has not had to suffer to be given chances or taken seriously, I do not and cannot claim to be an expert on issues my lived experience has shielded me from ever having to deal with – even with the honour of living in countless countries around the world.
However I can say the claims of companies wanting DEI is not working – not as it should – and I believe a big part of that is the attitude we have going into it, the policies we create to manage it and the overall approach to why we need it – and all those issues are down to white leadership not People of Colour.
And, to be clear, we need their talent and way of looking at the world.
Not just for relevance but creative possibility, influence and impact.
Personally I think they should just come together and leave us in the dirt.
We deserve it.
But they’re more generous than that. They’re also more dynamic given everything interesting in modern culture originates from them and their creativity.
So while I don’t normally ask you to listen to anything I say, this time I do.
Not because I want it to be about me, but because what you might be able to recognise and change.
And the irony of it all is we all win if we do it.
All of us.
Especially our increasingly stale and out-of-touch industry where we continue to use acronyms like BAME without thinking for a second what we are doing, what that is saying and we are defining.
You can listen to it here and if you want to hear more stuff I’ve learned from the journey I’ve been on, then these posts may be of interest … acknowledging they were born from the lessons from the brilliant and generous people I met rather than anything specifically from me.
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Your perspective is not everyone’s perspective.
[you could also check this one out or this]
The odds are not fair.
It’s not enough to hate racism, you have to fight it.
Agencies are still trying to colonise.
Why we should be more like The Blues Brothers.
Whose house are you asking people to come in?
Don’t let your ego fool you into thinking you know stuff.
Convenient excuses to keep things the same.
Own your own shit don’t ask those you have held down to help you clean it up.
Make space, or we die alone.
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And if you want more, let me know.
I have a bunch of stuff … from our books America in the Raw, China Misunderstood and Dream Small … through to other people, stories and resources I’ve been lucky enough to find or be a part of.
As I said, I don’t have all the answers.
And I certainly make a lot of mistakes.
But I am committed to making up for lost time because I hate that some of my actions of the past – while never intentional – will have added to the situation.
And I owe that to a lot of people for the faith they showed in me. And my hope for what I want to help enable for others.
It’s down to us. Not down to others creating HR policies for it.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Agency Culture, Attitude & Aptitude, Authenticity, Communication Strategy, Content, Context, Creativity, Culture, Diversity, Egovertising, Emotion, Empathy, Fear, Fragrance, Human Goodness, Humanity, Management, Men, Perfume, Planners, Planners Making A Complete Tit Of Themselves And Bless, Planning, Prejudice, Professionalism, Provocative, Relevance, Resonance, Respect
So this is the last post for a week as I’m travelling for work.
I know … I know …
And while you may claim it’s another freebie holiday, it really is work. Albeit this time, it’s work that is mental in terms of crazy and exiting … which I hope I can talk about someday as it’s definitely one of those moments I’d like everyone to know about because its huuuuuuuuge bragging rights, hahaha.
Anyway, given I’ve probably already screwed my NDA, let’s get on with this post shall we?
A while back I wrote a post about the fragrance naming of Tom Ford. Specifically, the ‘Vanilla Sex’ variant.
Someone commented they found it interesting that I – and likely all men – would immediately interpret this as ‘boring/average sex’ when vanilla is the most universally accessible scent so it could easily mean the scent represented ‘sweet smelling sex’.
I responded by saying that while it is true vanilla is the most universally accessible scent, it is also widely accepted that using that word in association with ‘sex’ had very different connotations … and that interpretation had nothing to do with gender, but maybe age.
They deleted their comment.
I am unsure why they did, but I can guess and that is disappointing.
Of course, I appreciate men make A LOT of interpretations, associations, and confident claims about things they know little about. They are the undisputed champions of arrogant stupidity.
I also appreciate get utterly fucked that is … especially when they wade into subject matters that exclusively revolve around women, or more associated with women or people who identify as a woman.
You see it a lot – in fact, it happened to one of the brilliant members of my team last week – Meg – when she wrote something on Linkedin about a Bumble campaign … and was immediately hit with men not just telling her she was wrong, but then telling her what she should be thinking.
Which is why when that shit happens, they need to be called out.
But when that isn’t the case – or you realise it isn’t – then deleting your involvement doesn’t help.
Of course I get why people do it … but it doesn’t help build connections, understanding and bridges.
And frankly, we need more of that.
The divide in our industry is insane.
People are actively looking for the wrong in what others say or interpreting any alternative perspective as a personal attack.
OK, sometimes that is justified, especially on platforms like Linkedin … but not always.
The reality is people make mistakes.
We all do.
Hell, in the league table of misadventure, I would definitely be in the top 10.
But the key – at least for me – is about context and intent and my belief is the vast majority of people don’t want to be assholes. More than that, they want to actively learn and grow.
Now I appreciate it may not always seem that way … I get some people are trolls who, for reasons I will never really understand, get off on being violent with their words on all platforms of social media [though it confuses me even more when they do it on Linkedin, given we can see who they are], but I’m pretty sure most people aren’t like that. I think most people are decent but that can only be seen when there is an openness and calmness to debate and discussion. From both sides of the debate.
Sadly, men also find this incredibly difficult to achieve.
Especially men who seem able to permanently reside on the social media platforms.
And while some of them are egotistical, judgemental pricks – literally and metaphorically – the majority aren’t and that is why I feel the best way we can help the industry unite and evolve is if we lose the ego and apologise when we’re wrong and not gloat like dicks when we’re right.
To actively encourage and embrace the new, even if we don’t understand it.
To be open to challenges but in the spirit of curiosity and growth rather than destruction.
And to be open to be wrong and own it rather than try to disown it.
Of course, this is a two-way street, but given men are probably the reason for the vast majority of this behaviour – or ‘normalizing’ it – it’s only fair we take the lead in trying to change it.
Or said another way … take the lead in creating the conditions that let everyone else feel safe to discuss, debate and disagree.
And while that may sound very fucking Disney – especially from me – the reality is if we don’t do that, then for all the cleverness we claim our discipline offers– we’re showing we’re not that smart.
Worse, we’re acting as a barrier to brilliant people entering the industry, wanting to enter the industry or being able to thrive in it.
And yes, I appreciate how ridiculous the heaviness of this post is given it was inspired by a comment about a perfume called Vanilla Sex … but sometimes the craziest things create crazy outcomes.
Which is why maybe Tom Ford could launch a perfume for the strategy discipline entitled ‘vanilla debate … a scent designed to put our focus on creating work that leaves a lasting aroma rather than a discipline that’s starting to smell a bit like a sewer.
And with that, I’ll see you on June 4th, because – bizarrely – New Zealand has a day off on the 3rd for King Charles birthday. Which is great, but also stupid given what Colonialism did to the rightful people of this land. But before I digress into another rant, I’ll leave you with one teeny bit of information about the 4th June. And that is it will be 8 days before my birthday … so if you send your cheques now, they should reach NZ just in time for my special day.
You’re welcome.
See you soon.
Filed under: Advertising, Agency Culture, Attitude & Aptitude, Complicity, Corporate Evil, Corporate Gaslighting, Fear, Prejudice
A few years ago, I wrote about the worst experience of my career.
I wrote how it threatened to completely undermine me.
Do permanent damage to me.
Rob me of my self-belief and confidence.
So my abuser/s had more power and control.
All while making me feel it was my fault so that the shame kept me quiet and complicit.
And I wrote about how it was only when I discovered I was not the only one going through this behaviour that I was free to see what it actually was.
Abuse.
An act of deliberate, professional violence.
Which led me to start Corporate Gaslighting, where I was then flooded with stories of more people going through the same thing.
All of those stories were hard to read, but one stuck with me.
In essence, it’s the story of someone who felt they couldn’t leave their abusive job because it might look like they’ve failed to people on Linkedin.
People may not understand that attitude, but it’s real … which is why the summary of the post, ‘sometimes changing job is not about growth, but mental health’ is one that still rings loudly in my ears.
I say this because I spoke to a friend recently who is going through a version of this.
Believing that because they’re well paid, it would be stupid to leave – despite the continued, systemic abuse they take.
I too was in that situation at one point in my life, which is why I was able to tell them something that [hopefully] helps them acknowledge what they already know – which is:
“How can you say you’re being paid well, when you’re being paid to accept illness?”
Illness in terms of your mental health.
Illness in terms of the loss of self-respect.
Illness in terms of seeing your confidence and wellbeing be shattered.
There’s a moment in some organisations where you realise the salary you receive is not for your talent and expertise but to be complicit to managements bad behaviour and/or accepting of the abuse they subject you too.
Now I appreciate some people will have less sympathy for someone earning a good salary and facing abuse than someone without the safety net of cash.
I get it … but you’d be wrong.
Because while certain contexts are different, the destructive impact is the same.
The feeling of being trapped.
Lost and helpless.
Paralysed.
Reinforced by feelings of it being all your own fault … that you’re not good enough and you’ve let everyone down.
An endless cycle of being taken apart piece by piece.
And while you may think all they have to do is leave, it’s almost impossible.
Because you feel shame.
Embarrassment.
Believing you’ll never work again because you’re not worthy of being hired.
So you just sink deeper into your shell and take their shit.
Systematically being stripped of everything that makes you, you until the abusers have had enough playing with their power and decide to kick you to the curb … resulting in you feeling even more alone. More isolated. Which you keep to yourself because you have been made to feel it’s all your own doing.
And while you may think an alternative approach is to try and prove to your abusers you are good enough … you’d also be wrong. Because apart from the fact that being respected by people you don’t respect means you’ve still lost … the only way to ‘win them over’ is to be just like them.
The reality is no job should cost you your health.
None.
Salary is not about ownership or control.
Which is why being paid ‘well’ is more than what you get, but how you’re treated.
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I’m travelling for work for the rest of this week so there’s no blog posts till next Monday. Try not to be too upset. Actually, can you try to be a little upset … that would satisfy my delusion and make me all together happier. Ta.