Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Brand, Confidence, Creativity, Culture, Emotion, Fashion, Fragrance, Luxury, Planning, Smell
A while back I wrote a post about the naming strategies of fragrance brands.
Or should I say the lack of them.
It wasn’t a dig, it was almost fawning respect for their complete disregard for logic and their blind commitment to visceral inducing, imagination.
To be honest, the self-awareness is inspiring.
An acknowledgement that in the big scheme of things, their product is kind-of ridiculous and so by embracing that, they can go wherever they want with their naming approach … which is how we end up with Tom Ford’s Noir Extreme … because in the business of smell, the darkness of ‘noir’ just isn’t dark enough.
However in their ‘anything goes’ mentality, they may just gone a bit too errrrrm, mental.
Have a look at this …
Vanilla Sex.
VANILLA FUCKING SEX!!!???
Jesus bloody Christ … they may as well call it, ‘Excel Spreadsheet’.
Now while I appreciate sex is seemingly going out of fashion, I’m not sure a scent that conveys ‘the most average 3 minutes of your life’ ignites aspiration.
Even among Monks or Nuns.
Or Billy. Hahaha.
For a category that loves to communicate its power of seduction, attraction, expression or self-confidence, Vanilla Sex pours a big bucket of cold water over all that and instead celebrates the idea of feeling like you’ve been fucked by a Tax Accountant from Slough.
At 3:17pm.
On a cold Tuesday.
In a Travel Lodge.
Located on the side of a Motorway service station.
It’s so utterly bonkers I don’t know if it is an act of brilliance, madness or just a desire to just see what they can get away with.
Or maybe it’s just proof they don’t give a damn because by the same token, they also have this …
It’s all kinds of amazing.
A case study for the power of strategy to take brands to places never imagined or, by the same token, proof this strategy stuff is all fucking nonsense because even when you ignore – and break – every rule of it, you can still be wildly successful.
But as amazing as all this is, it’s still not as amazing as the thought that two people could meet one day with one smelling like Vanilla Sex and the other being Fucking Fabulous.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Attitude & Aptitude, Brand, Brand Suicide, Brilliant Marketing Ideas In History, Comment, Communication Strategy, Confidence, Context, Crap Marketing Ideas From History!, Creativity, Culture, Devious Strategy, Differentiation, Effectiveness, Entertainment, Happiness, Innovation, Luxury, Mischief, Packaging, Planning, Professionalism, Relevance, Resonance, Strategy
This is the last post for a week because I’m off again.
I know … I know … it’s getting ridiculous, but consider my jet-lag, your mental health.
Talking of mental health … I’ve not had a drop of alcohol for 38 years.
THIRTY EIGHT.
But despite that, I do find myself buying it on occasion … mainly when those occasions are an extremely rare dinner invite and/or a desire to show gratitude towards someone in particular.
And when that happens, I remind myself how easily influenced I can be.
Because as we saw in 2007, my biggest motivator is the packaging rather than the quality of the product.
Well, I say that, but it has to be a brand I’ve at least heard of – a brand I associate with some sort of quality – but fundamentally, it’s all about the packaging.
Recently I wanted to get something for our old neighbour in LA.
It was his birthday … he’s an amazing human … and he invited me to his dinner. [I was in town, so it wasn’t some totally empty gesture]
So I rushed to a bottle shop and was immediately hit with a wealth of choices and options and so what did I end up choosing?
This.
Yep, a bottle of Veuve in a pseudo orange SMEG fridge.
Frankly it looked ridiculous … hell, it is ridiculous … but it’s also my kind of ridiculous, despite even my low-class tastes thought that for 2 brands that are supposedly ‘premium’, the way they combined looked cheap and tragic.
But unsuprisingly, my inner Dolly ‘it-costs-a-lot-of-money-to-look-this-cheap’ Parton, took over and I handed over my cash and walked out full of smugness and slight humiliation.
Now I don’t know the background to this collab.
I don’t know the process they took to get here,
And while on one level it makes some-sort-of-sense, it also is completely and utterly bonkers … and that’s why I love it.
Because in a world of sensible, it’s nice to see ridiculous win.
Yes, I appreciate Apple’s ‘ceremony of purchase’ packaging strategy is next level … but in terms of what I call, ‘social luxury’, the use of ridiculous packaging – as seen in the fragrance industry – is arguably, the most sensible thing they can do.
For all the processes, models and eco-systems being pushed by so many people right now, it’s interesting how few actively encourage searching for the weird edges. Ironically, they build approaches where the aim is to filter these out before they even have a chance to see what they can do. Which is why as much as the we laugh at the superficiality of fragrance companies and some alcohol brands, they can teach us more about standing out than all these models that seem obsessed with making sure we all ‘fit in’.
So who are the stupid ones now eh?
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, China, Chinese Culture, Comment, Hotels, Luxury, Management, Marketing, Marketing Fail
So I recently went back to China.
If that wasn’t wonderful enough, I was put up at the Waldorf Astoria.
If I’m being honest, I still get a thrill at staying in hotels. As a kid, we NEVER stayed in one – in fact the closest was a B&B in York – so every time I step in one, I feel excited.
But this was something else.
Something I didn’t deserve or – if truth be told – felt comfortable with.
It was sooooooooo over-the-top because the Waldorf Astoria x China makes for the most ostentatious experience you could ever imagine.
They were so nice to me, even though I imagine that every time they saw me in my shitty jeans and t-shirt, they wondered how the hell I was there.
But there was something before my trip that showed that even those at the very top of their game, can make mistakes.
It was this …
What the fuck?
Put aside the fact they called me Robert. Put aside the fact they talk about cleaning/disinfectant brands. Put aside the fact that by mentioning they are part of the Hilton group, they immediately diminish the prestige of the Waldorf. But why in gods name would anyone talk about ‘hygiene’ in a top hotel when that is the minimum expectation and now you’re left wondering what the fuck may have happened.
Worse, why would anyone talk about hygiene and use the name of brands you pick up in the Supermarket as examples of their exemplary cleaning practices. Not that I have anything against Lysol or Dettol, but I don’t think of them as the best in industrial cleaning, more like the stuff you use every now and then.
Yes … I appreciate Covid is still recent.
And it is something that originated in China.
And the country is still in its early days of opening up to the World.
But why, oh why would they raise an issue than you would never have considered an issue?
Of course when it came to the actual stay, it was brilliant. The people were amazing. And being back in China was wonderful – because of all the special places I’ve lived, China is the most special to me.
However of all the great memories that trip gave me – including the utterly bizarre experience of being interviewed by Fashion TV [I know, I fucking know!!!] – there’s one that should serve as a very important lesson for anyone who ever feels intimidated to talk/deal with people they perceive as being more successful than them.
Being rich, doesn’t mean you’re clever.
When I was young, I loved looking through the Argos and Innovations catalogues.
They were a window into a world I couldn’t imagine.
One filled with gadgets and toys I’d never see, let alone never own.
It’s partly why whenever I fly, I always look at the Duty Free catalogue.
Because outside of the sexist shit like ‘air hostess outfits for girls and pilot suits for boys’ and prices that never seemingly being any less than I could get in a store … there’s something magical – at least for me – in seeing what’s on offer.
Bad versions of expensive brands.
Updated versions of old products.
Endless amounts of perfume and questionable jewellery.
I love it. Hell, I’ve even bought things from it occasionally … though the mini-projector ended up being something I used precisely ZERO times.
But post-covid, the people behind these catalogues have decided passengers are super rich and super stupid.
I get why they would think that with the price of tickets these days.
But even then, I am wracking my brain to work out who would get on a plane and order this …
A bed.
A SG$24,000 bed.
Seriously, what the absolute fuck?
I know there’s a lot of bed companies these days offering ’60+ free nights’ … but this isn’t one of those.
This is the real deal … mattress AND remote control flexible frame.
For the price of a car. Or at least a second-hand car.
And they expect you to buy it, without trying it, via an inflight, duty-free catalogue.
I’d kill to know if any have ever been sold. I’d kill to know the reasoning behind why they did it.
And I’d kill anyone who ordered one.
Forget Duty Free this would be Brain Free … or, the new way to signal to people you have vulgar wealth.
Better than a Black Centurion AMEX or a Lambo with Pepper Pig.
Evolution sure works in some strange ways …
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Attitude & Aptitude, Audi, Authenticity, Brand, Communication Strategy, Corporate Evil, Culture, Honesty, Luxury, Management, Mediocrity, Metallica, Packaging, Premium, Resonance, Respect, Standards, Status, Strategy
A lot of luxury brands, invite a lot of mocking.
It might be what they make.
It might be the prices they charge.
It might be the way they look at the world.
But whatever your opinion, at least they commit.
Walk into a proper high-end luxury brand and you see high-end standards and experience.
Everywhere.
[The Netflix series ‘7 Day’s’ perfectly demonstrates this, as I wrote about here]
Innovation. Craft. Details. Service. Packaging. Training.
You might not like it.
You might not value it.
But you can’t say they’re not committed to it.
Now compare that to companies that like to position themselves as ‘premium’.
Sure, some live up to it … but my god, most don’t.
The only premium-ness is often only in their pricing and ego.
Big talking to the public, short-changing everywhere else around them.
Now I get you have to look after the pennies in business, but when you claim to be premium – it should mean you recognize the value of premium standards and service in those around you and with you. And if you don’t – or you don’t think the people you are dealing with offer that – then why the fuck are you dealing with them?
I’ve written about this before, but once-upon-a-time I was asked to work on a freelance project for a high-end German brand.
I submitted my estimate to which I was met with the following reply:
“Your fee is higher than other partners we use, please lower it”.
That was it. Not even an indication of the costs they were comparing me too.
Now while I value what I do, the costs weren’t excessive.
Infact they were a fraction of the cost of one of their lowest priced products.
But more than that, I’d agreed my fees with the CMO before I submitted them to procurement, so I thought., ‘fuck this’ and wrote the following response.
“Your products are higher priced than other brands I could choose, please lower it”.
I know … it was cheeky, but I just thought they were incredibly arrogant in their attitude, especially in the way they wanted to undermine my experience.
And guess what, almost immediately they replied with,
“We accept your rate and look forward to working with you” … which is the exact moment I saw through the hype.
Brands who value quality don’t benchmark costs against the lowest market rates.
I get it’s a negotiation tactic, but it also reveals their hypocrisy and insecurity.
It’s why my experience with Metallica was so shocking … despite the fact what they do and value all makes total sense but the way most business operates means it felt so bizarre.
Actually, Metallica are a great example of a brand that values who they are.
Everything they do is focused on respecting the quality of what they do.
For example, to make sure their vinyl is always of the highest quality – they bought the best vinyl printing press company in the world.
Same with their live shows …
To ensure their sound is of the highest quality, they had the highest-quality live speaker system in the world built.
Rather than approach investments in terms of ‘what can we get away with’, their attitude is to put highest quality first … which is why they buy stuff rather than lease it because not only does it ensure their creativity is given the highest possible quality [rather than the best they can get away with] it ensures they always have priority access to it. And when they don’t need to use it, they get people like me to work out how to make it pay for itself, which often ends up leasing it to other bands who don’t have the same needs/standards or values as them.
Metallica understand standards better than most brands.
But then they understand who they are better than most brands.
Which is why everything they do is focus up to the quality not down to the price.
That’s a proper premium brand … one who makes decisions that reflects who they are not who they are pretending to be.
Christ, I recently saw a rep from a coffee brand get into their gold Audi.
It stood out to me because it was a errrrrm, gold Audi.
And while some may look at it and say,
“If they drove a Prius, maybe their coffee prices were lower”
… not only are they unlikely to be people who buy their coffee, they are also unlikely to care about the difference of coffee.
That’s not a diss … I like Nescafe with Coffee Mate … but it also doesn’t mean that my taste is reflective of everyone else’s either.
Whether true or not, my impression of a brand giving their rep this choice of car was they had a different perspective on standards. Rather than give their reps the lowest priced car they could get away with, they found the most efficient car of the standards they live and operate in.
Of course many may slate or disagree with me for this view …
I also appreciate some may find their choice a reflection of their pretentiousness, which they find fucking annoying.
And in some way I agree with them.
However I feel a lot better about pretentious assholes when that’s who they actually are rather than those who do it to look like they’re premium when everything else highlights they’re anything but.
Commitment costs.
You might not want to pay it … you might not understand the reasoning for it … but at least you’re dealing with people who believe it rather than those who are exploiting you for it.