Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Attitude & Aptitude, Authenticity, Brand, Comment, Communication Strategy, Creativity, Culture, Emotion, Family, Fashion, Fulfillment, Happiness, Health, Individuality

So as I wrote a couple of weeks ago, my health situation has had a profound affect on me.
Not just physically, but emotionally.
From actually liking myself a bit to suddenly being interested in clothes – simply because now I feel I have access to choice, whereas before I was left behind by it.
I know that might sound weird for a person who has seemingly only ever worn shorts/jeans, black t-shirts with weird logos on them and Birkenstocks … but while I love those items and still wear those items, I have to acknowledge some of this may have been influenced by their accessibility to me.
But now a whole new world has opened up.
Different shapes, different styles, different colours and different brands.
Admittedly, part of this has been helped by having a client who is the Godfather of Street Culture Fashion and who keeps sending me clothes from the brands he’s started/bought/owns … but maybe, for the first time in at least 3 decades, I not only can explore and experiment with fashion, I want to.
It’s stark, raving, bonkers.
And you know what else is crazy … they’re not too bad on me.
OK, I know I’m never going to be Mr Stylish, but I’m also not Mr Blobby anymore either.
It’s made everyone happier.
Me.
My family.
My friends.
My colleagues.
My clients … especially the fashion lot, who – maybe for the first time – are happy to be seen with me rather than just work with me.
But there’s one item of clothing that has now entered my life that really highlights the impact of this healthier lifestyle.
Again, part of it has been influenced by freebies – which in this case, the copious amount of NIKE’s I’ve been given over the years – but I’ve started buying socks.
FUCKING SOCKS!!! Who the hell am I?
But it gets worse, because they’re not the cheap, ultra-thin, black sock shit from the local supermarket that I’d have grabbed in the past [unless NIKE gave me some] … they’re socks like this:

Yep, designer-ish socks.
OK, so these are sweary socks – or KFC fan socks, depending where you look – but I have loads of different ones. In different colours. With different imagery and messages.
And I bought them.
With my own money.
And why did I do this?
Because – get this – I CAN COLOUR CODE THEM WITH WHAT I’M WEARING.
I find this both sickening and hilarious all at the same time. But I’m here for it, because it is a symbol that I am starting to care about myself in ways I never cared about myself. Not in some desperate need to look stylish – because we’ve already acknowledged I’ll never be that – but to remember than my health has given me choice.
Now I appreciate this sounds stupid.
And I appreciate most people have been this way for decades.
Plus – as a mate recently said – I acknowledge I’ve swapped one daft fashion addiction for another.
But for 53 years, I’ve never had a chance to explore this side of my character and so it’s all new, intriguing and fascinating. At least right now.
Of course it doesn’t mean I’ve ditched the birkies.
Or the jeans/shorts.
Or the black tees with weird logos on them.
It just means they’re more of a choice than a necessity and while there is a disgusting amount of superficiality behind what this has ignited within me, it’s quite an infectious feeling. Which is why I want to thank my family, friends, colleagues and clients for all their support and encouragement on this journey, because I couldn’t have done it without them. I should also thank them for not raising their eyebrows too much at some of the things I am turning up in each day, hahaha.
Hopefully you can tell from how much I’ve written about this subject in the last 4 months, that this has been an incredibly powerful and liberating experience for me. I may muck up in the future, but how I feel because of it is too strong for me to completely forget.
Which is why I can’t work out why health companies have not talked about this benefit in their advertising. Some may have mentioned it – albeit in very contrived and superficial ways – though most tend to either be utterly rational or all about body shape.
Now while I am sure those approaches connect to some audiences, from my perspective the most surprising and enjoyable benefit has been feeling I have been welcomed back into life. That I have choice. That I have a way to explore and express who I am and who I can be.
Or said another way, I get to play dress up, but for adults. And not in a weird way.
Well, not in the weird way some people could read that.
And while that may not sound exciting in words, for those experiencing it, it’s about as uplifting as you can get. Because you’re not just living life, you’re rediscovering it … but with all the experience and lessons from the years before. [But sadly, without the ability to exploit history to make loads of cash … damnit!]
As I’ve said before … should anyone be interested in knowing what I did and how I did it, just let me know. I’m no expert – and I still have a way to go – but I found a way to make it work for me and if it can help you, I will be happy to share.
No judgement. No expectations. And no recommendations on socks. Promise.
Filed under: Advertising, Agency Culture, Attitude & Aptitude, Authenticity, Comment, Complicity, Confidence, Contribution, Creativity, Culture, Fake Attitude, Management, Marketing, Marketing Fail, Mediocrity, Perspective, Relationships, Relevance, Resonance
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When I first worked in Asia, I was struck by how many people attended meetings.
More than that, I was struck by how many people attended meetings and did/said nothing.
Now I am all for exposing young talent to stuff like this – it’s interesting and valuable and I realise how helpful and beneficial it was to me when I experienced it – however the longer I lived there, the more I realised it had nothing to do with ‘education’ and everything to do with ego and pandering.
Ego in the sense of ‘look how many people I’ve got working for me’.
Pandering in the sense of ‘look how important you are to us’.
And while you may think clients would look at this and question why they are paying for that many people – albeit at that time, talent was very cheap in comparison to other markets – the reality is they were also playing the game, so the inflation rate of ‘meeting attendance’ was worse than Russian currency circa 1984.
Over my time there, I managed to kill this attitude – at least with the meetings I had – reducing the numbers present to just the essential people and maybe one ‘observer’ for exposure and education … which is why you can imagine my surprise when I left Asia and found the West had now also adopted the ‘loads of people in attendance’ protocol for every internal/client meeting.
And for exactly the same reasons.
ARGHHHHHH.
While I appreciate every bit of work takes a village and clarity, communication and collaboration play a vital role in making great things happen … you don’t need everyone to be in every meeting. And yet some people find a way to always be there. To inject themselves into processes without ever actually doing anything … just seemingly looking like they are.
Which is why this piece by George Tannenbaum so good.
Tragic in it’s truth, but so good in its observation.
And while it is on companies for allowing this behaviour – which is madness, given how challenging times are for business right now, and how they could be better supporting/paying those people who are actively contributing to the work rather than hiding behind it – it is also indicative of how some organisations value complicity more than different opinions.

Now I appreciate there will be some people out there who will think the idea of being a piece of parsley sounds great.
You get paid.
You pretend to be important.
You attend the big meetings.
But the reality is – as George points out – everyone knows you’re pointless.
A bit of garnish always left to the side.
Nothing distinctive.
Completely replaceable.
Lacking any taste or value.
Or said another way, a life of complicity, not respectability.
And while George writes it as if parsley is still a necessity, I feel differently which is why I would say if you want a career … one of the best pieces of advice I could give is always look for ways to be the steak.
Doesn’t matter what job you do.
What level you’re at.
Add value, not just garnish.
It may be simply doing what is needed when it’s needed. It may be bringing new ideas to old problems. It may simply be being interested in what others are interested in.
Because while that might sound harder work than being parsley, it’s not as hard as the effort it takes to look busy while producing nothing. Let alone the strength of character it requires to ignore the fact you know your colleagues know exactly what you’re doing and they’re showing you the exact amount of respect that your attitude deserves.
And if you want proof, read Matt Beaumont’s brilliant book, E.
Specifically the actions, behaviour and response of the ‘head of account management’.
It’s supposed to be a comedy, but it’s really a documentary … and a reminder that people may absolutely detest assholes, but they detest imposter assholes most of all.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Agency Culture, Attitude & Aptitude, Audacious, BBH, Colenso, Colleagues, Comment, Confidence, Creative Development, Creativity, Culture, Management, Marketing, New Zealand, Provocative, Relevance, Resonance, Ridiculous, Wieden+Kennedy

I’ve always had a love/hate relationship with advertising awards.
Of course, it’s nice to have them … but for me, it’s always about who you are competing against and who the judges are who are deciding them.
Oh, and whether those who have won before, won with real work or ‘ultra-niche, ultra-limited edition’ one-offs.
Also known as scam.
You generally can tell when that shit happens because they tend to either:
1. Be a one-off from the clients normal approach to work.
2. Be a one-off from the normal output of the agency.
Fortunately, it is less than it used to be, but still more than it should.
That’s why the agencies who do it properly deserve more credit.
To win awards as a byproduct of the work you make rather than it be the focus of the work you make, is a noble cause.
There’s more of them than we often give credit for … and you can generally tell who they are by how long they’ve been able to play at that level.
A few years ago, I wrote about how W+K and BBH were brilliant examples of this.
How they proved the old adage ‘it’s easier to get to the top than to stay there’.
And it’s so true.
Because without wanting to take anything away from anyone who does well, being able to do it consistently is an even greater achievement.
I say this because I think Colenso is one of these places.

For over 50 years, we’ve consistently made work that has been recognised by the best in the world as some of the best in the world.
NZ has tended to do very well in this area … DDB, Saatchi, Special to name a few … but few have done it with the longevity and sustainability of Colenso.
And a big part of that is because of the culture it cultivates.
From our approach to the work we make to the people we hire to make it … at the heart of everything is a deep love and respect for the power of creativity.
Lots of people will say that.
Lots of agencies will say that.
But you find out who means it through the work that they consistently make.
And that is – like all the places who consistently do good stuff – one of the traits that reveal who we really are.
That doesn’t mean we’re the easiest place to work.
Because even though the place is full of good and talented creative people … it’s also a challenging, demanding, opinionated and provocative environment, because ultimately, we have 50+ years of standards and expectations to honour, live up to and try to push further.
As the picture at the top of this page – from 934843049 years ago – shows.
But what’s interesting is how we want those standards and expectations to manifest.
Because it’s not about playing to be accurate, it’s about doing the right thing in the most interesting, original and audacious ways.
Do we always get it right?
Nope.
But we always strive to get it right and that’s why we are consistently awarded at the highest level for work as varied [and effective] as turning beer into an alternative fuel for cars, creating a radio station for dogs, getting Rick and Morty to explain green energy to youth culture and making a radio campaign that doubled as an outdoor campaign that asked New Zealand to make a radio campaign … to name but a very few.
And while this post sounds unbelievably corporate toady … it’s my way of paying homage to my colleagues and, especially, my partners.

Now I could wax lyrical about Si – our CCO – because he’s not just horribly talented, he is possibly the nicest human I’ve ever worked with.
[Well, I say nice, but he has his moments of evil – but even then, he manages to deliver it with a niceness that makes every Disney character look like a bunch of pricks]
But the reality is, you’d expect the leader of Colenso to be brilliant … otherwise why the hell are they here.
Which is why who I really need to acknowledge is our MD – Ange – because she’s the Ringmaster of the whole Colenso circus.
It can’t be easy.
Not just because she has to deal with me – let alone sit next to me – she also has to work with a bunch of people thinking up ridiculous ideas that challenge and confront on every level.
Not just creatively … but in terms of time, simplicity and possibility.
Yet she manages it.
More than that, she would fight for the death to maintain it.
Which is why the thing that is often forgotten about the agencies who consistently make great work is not just the people behind it … but the people who make it possible.
The people who create the conditions for it to thrive.
From the MD’s and finance people to the IT and support staff.
But – and here is the critical thing – it’s more than them just doing their job well, it’s them doing their job through the lens of what the whole company is striving to do.
Because to paraphrase that famous story of the janitor who met President Kennedy …
They’re not working in a vacuum, immune from the needs and ambitions of everyone around them… they’re helping make the most audacious ideas get out the door.
Here’s to all of them. Every last fucking one of them.
With that, the first month of ’24 is done. And I can tell you, I’m as surprised as anyone that I decided to finish it in such an earnest, generous way.
Let’s hope February is less nice. Even I feel sick with it.


Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Attitude & Aptitude, Authenticity, Colenso, Comment, Confidence, Culture, New Zealand
Late last year, I talked about a photo I was sent from when I was much younger.
I talked about how I looked like the mass murderer Chopper Read and that it scared the hell out of me because while I never was a looker – bar the photo above, on my first day at ‘big school’, albeit with a ‘school badge’ on my jacket that was the size of Africa – I never realised I was that visually challenged.
On one side that is to be expected, because there is a huge amount of research that has identified that our brain is designed to protect us from harmful truth – hence ‘rose tinted glasses’ is not purely delusional, but also biological – but still, it was pretty confronting.
However, once the initial shock passed, it was kind-of liberating because when you know that your youth wasn’t your golden age, you don’t really care about all that stuff and then you can embrace who you want to be rather than feel oppressed by who society expects you to be.
Which is my way of explaining – and justifying – why I recently went to work dressed like this …
I should point out that I thought I was going as Patrick Star … a character from SpongeBob SquarePants, however seeing this photo, I realise I went as the Pornhub version, because I am a giant penis.
I appreciate many of you have long thought I was a dickhead, but my god – this is bad.
HR violation bad … made worse by the purple ‘cow print’ lower half which, in a certain light, looks a big like old man testicles.
That said, I went to great effort to colour code my footwear to my outfit with pink socks and yellow Jordan’s, which may be the first time in my history I have been so co-ordinated. Just a shame I decided to save it for the time I dressed as the biggest dick since Elon Musk.
So to my colleagues, I wish to publicly apologise and – in my defence – point them to this post, to explain how they are really all to blame for this alarming lack of judgement.
Have a good day … that is, if you can burn that image from your mind.