The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]


Catching Up On Netflix …
August 27, 2021, 8:00 am
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Comment, Holiday, Jill

So no posts till Tuesday.

While this is good news for you, spare a thought for my poor wife, who has to deal with me for FOUR DAYS IN A ROW. And she thought moving to NZ put an end to that. Cue: Evil Laugh.



Love Is Lazy …

I found this photo recently.

It’s a few years old, when we lived in London … but there’s something about it that just warms my heart.

Not just because it features my son – though that helps – but because it in a period of pandemic chaos, it shows how love can make everything OK.

Covid had just taken hold.

We were all confined to home.

No one was offering any clarity.

People were dying at unprecedented numbers.

And Otis desperately needed his hair washing.

However …

… he was also playing a video game he absolutely didn’t want to stop playing so – because his world had been turned completely upside down – his wonderful, kind, considerate Mum found a way for him to keep playing while she could do some hair washing.

Obviously it is an utterly ridiculous way to do things, but it’s my ridiculous.

A moment of twisted normality at a time where nothing felt normal whatsoever.

And while I appreciate this is an utterly indulgent photograph, I love the way he seems oblivious to his surroundings. His little legs stretched out to the tip of his toes. And a kitchen that has been rapidly turned into a school, a playroom and a hairdressers all at the same time.

While we were painfully aware of the privileged position we were in – from having an income to having a teeny garden to escape in – the fear of COVID was starting to take a hold which is why, as I look at that photo today, I realise how much my ridiculously beautifully family let me feel we were strong together at a point where everything was feeling like it was falling apart.



A Year On From A Half Century …

This time last year, I was writing about how I only had 11 days left of my 40’s.

That I would soon be reaching my ‘half century of age‘.

To say a lot has happened since then is an understatement.

A year ago, I was living in Fulham, working with R/GA and stuck in the first lockdown.

Since then, I have gone through redundancy, bought a beautiful family home in the countryside, watched Forest fuck up the best chance for promotion that they’ve had in 20 years, been in The Guardian newspaper, got ‘The Hoff’ to make a video for my beloved Paul’s big 5-0 birthday, started Uncorporated with Metallica’s management … worked with even more rockstars and billionaires … as well as some fashion icons, music producer legends and the most anticipated video game in history … bought a house in New Zealand that we never saw, moved to New Zealand in the middle of a pandemic, started working at the wonderful Colenso and got to see my family start living a ‘normal’ life again.

And that’s just the big bits.

So here we are again.

The beginning of the month of my birthday.

I hope to fuck this year is not as traumatic.

I’m fine with the variety, but please, not as traumatic.



Let Them Be Fragile Around You, Not Defining You …

Once upon a time I worked with a male creative who was one of the most sexist pricks I’ve ever met. He was condescending, patronising and – even worse – did all they could to stand in the way of female talent.

There was one situation where he actively tried to stop me from hiring one of the best planners in the World simply because she was a woman … knew more about sport than him and was much better at it as well.

He tried so hard to find fault with her, when all the time he was revealing his fragile ego.

And while I dealt with him – resulting in us hiring this brilliant planner who has gone on to have the sort of career most people could only ever dream of having – the fact is, her career could have been severely undermined if he had got his way.

What makes it worse is he is a loving father of daughters.

If anyone should be treating female talent with respect and encouragement – surely it should be someone with 2 daughters of their own. But then I remembered watching the ex-Prime Minister of Iceland – VigdĂ­s Finnbogadottir – in Michael Moore’s documentary, ‘Where To Invade Next’ who explained things perfectly.

“While men would never want another man standing in the way of their daughters career potential, that attitude only extends to their daughter … not women in general”.

Of course she’s right.

That’s what’s so fucked up. Especially about men.

As is the vernacular they use to describe female colleagues.

Calling them emotional.

Fragile.

Weak.

And while I would rather work with an emotional, sensitive and compassionate person any day of the weak, the fact is women are way stronger than the vast majority of men I know.

Fuck, my wife has shown more courage than I could ever hope to muster.

From saying yes to moving countries with a man she had only known for 6 weeks to carrying our kid for 9 months and then PUSHING HIM OUT to just embracing every challenge that has been put in her way … everything about her is stronger than Superman and more inspiring than any Nike spot. [Sorry Swoosh, you know I still love you]

Then there’s the fact the vast majority of female leaders [of which there’s still too few] actively bring their whole team along with them versus a lot of men, who just want to take themselves forward.

And yet, despite all this, women continually face gender devaluation by many men – specifically white men – which is why I bloody love the poster at the top of this post designed by the brilliant Kat at Colenso designed from this amazing quote by Rahul Singh Rathour.

Which is why I hope women embrace being fragile like a bomb … because it means those around them will fear them rather than them having to fear those around them.



We’ll Meet Again …

So even though we are not leaving for NZ for a month, this is my last post for at least a month.

Moving countries always requires a bunch of things to be done, and despite us being old hands at it, doing it during a pandemic means we have a bunch more stuff to do – hence the blog post rest.

Being back in England has been a special time.

Part of it is because I never thought I would have lived here again.

Part of it is because I have been able to catch up with old friends once more.

Part of it is because I love big cities and always wanted to live in London.

Part of it is because despite its bullshit, it’s still my home and I’ve loved being in a place where so much of it just felt natural.

And part of it is because of the new friends I have met along the way.

To think I didn’t know people like Tanter, Nils, the beautifully irresponsible – in the most responsible way – Mike and Sam, the entire planning gang at R/GA [though Lachlan did remind me when I started that we had once met in Australia … when he was a student, hahahaha], Michael Roberts, Ben Major, Tarik at Onroad, Sam Clohesy, Ian Preston, Trudie, the inspirational [whether he accepts that or not] Murray Calder, Keerti, Munraj, Larissa Vince – who is a better Nottingham Forest than I could ever be, John, Nana at POCC, Asheru, Louise Jack, Eduardo, Sara Tate, Holly Day, Ally and everyone at Brixton Finishing School, Dorcas, Abi, the incredible Kay Adekunle Rufai from the S-M-I-L-E-ing Boys project, Nick Hirst, Tom Roach and countless other people from work or – shock, horror – Twitter [including one of my ad-icons, Trevor Beattie] … is astounding.

And while I am thrilled to be going to New Zealand for our next adventure, leaving England is much harder than I thought it would.

Without doubt, a big part of that is because as much as I’ve been away, it still feels like home.

Not just because we bought our beautiful house here, but because my beloved Paul and Shelly are here.

And while the pandemic meant we didn’t see each other as much as we would have liked, it’s more than I’d had in quarter of a century and I will treasure that as much as I treasure the fact Paul and I are still as stupid together, as we were when we were kids.

England is where I was raised.

And while I have sold the family home to buy our new family home … it doesn’t take away from the fact, so many of the things that made me who I am, were made here.

Of course I wish my Mum and Dad were still alive.

How I would have loved to have made them happy to be ‘home again’.

How I would have loved to have spent so much time chatting and remembering together.

But maybe it they were still alive we wouldn’t have gone to NZ and so it appears they are still encouraging me to explore, even without them here anymore.

Though I would happily swap it all for another day together, even though I am also happy they have not had to endure the hardship that COVID has placed on the country. I can’t imagine what it would be like for them to have to deal with it and I have nothing but admiration for any person trying to manage/balance that situation with their own family.

But we’re off … and frankly, the idea of going to New Zealand feels like one of the greatest gift in the World.

That we will soon be in a country where WE CAN GO OUT TO DINNER IN A RESTAURANT seems almost impossible.

That we will soon be in a country where Otis CAN PLAY OUTSIDE WITH HIS [NEW] FRIENDS WHENEVER HE WANTS is a dream.

That we will soon be able to go visit Jill’s Mum IN A MATTER OF HOURS is madness, given it’s been 17 years since she could do that.

And that I get to do this while working at one of my favourite companies in the World – the brilliant Colenso – is, frankly, insane.

I’m so excited for the adventures we’ll have.
The experiences we will discover and learn from.
Not to mention the work I will able to be a part of creating.

That said, I cannot thank all the brilliant people who have made my return to England so special, enough.

I will miss so much about here, but the memories will also last me through till our return.

And we will be back.

Don’t know where. Don’t know when.

But – not wishing to make it sound like a threat – I know we’ll meet again, some sunny day.

Take care of yourselves. Thank you for everything.

See you on the other side. Literally and metaphorically.