Filed under: Advertising, Attitude & Aptitude, China, Comment, Communication Strategy, Crap Campaigns In History, Crap Marketing Ideas From History!, Creative Development, Creativity, Egovertising, Fake Attitude, Focus Groups, Management, Marketing, Marketing Fail, Nike, olympics, Planning, Pretentious Rubbish, Relevance, Resonance, Respect, Shanghai, Wieden+Kennedy
Toothpaste.
It’s all kind-of the same isn’t it.
OK, so the manufacturers would disagree – which is why they keep launching different variants with all manner of ‘secret ingredients’ – but to the average person on the street, not only is the product pretty much the same, so is the advertising.
I get it, toothpaste ads must be hard … but even that doesn’t justify this shit from Colgate.
Cop a load of this.
Yep … ‘Made for greatness’.
Not made for great teeth, but greatness.
Hmmmmn … that’s not an over-claim whatsoever is it?
It’s a toothpaste.
For teeth.
TEETH.
And while teeth have a big role in our lives – and culture – THEY HAVE FUCK ALL TO DO WITH YOUR ABILITy TO CLIMB A MOUNTAIN.
Or a flight of stairs for that matter.
Now I appreciate I’m biased because in 2012, we did Greatness for the London Olympics … but have a look and tell me which you think is better … more resonant and more appropriate?
Yes, exactly.
And that’s before you have been reminded about the two lead NIKE Olympic ads from 2012.
God, even now Jogger gives me chills.
As I said, I get how hard toothpaste ads must be, but if Colgate want to do something right and interesting, they should give me a call – as I literally have 3 great ideas they can have. For a price. On the bright side, I promise you that whatever the price we agree on, you wont have to pay with your dignity like you have had to do with this.
Oh god how I’d love it if they did that, even though we all know it’s not going to happen.
So I’ll leave you with this.
Colgate … I am sure this passed all manner of internal research tests.
I am sure you this makes you all feel you’re doing something really important for humanity.
And while healthy, bright, strong, clean teeth are important – and Colgate plays a big role in that – it would be so much better if it helped make the brains of the people who approved this, as bright as their teeth, because maybe they wouldn’t have churned out the advertising equivalent of a root canal without anaesthetic.
Call me Colgate. Seriously. Please call me. I can put a billion dollar smile on your face.
Filed under: Advertising, Attitude & Aptitude, Colenso, Comment, Creativity, Culture, Marketing, Relevance, Resonance
A long time ago there was an ad I absolutely loved.
It was very funny.
It was founded on an interesting premise.
It captured the spirit of the times perfectly.
It was this …
How good it that eh?
And as great as it is … if you live in NZ or Australia, it takes on a whole different level of cultural significance because people here used to see this sort of thing every day, every summer.
I must admit, I’d forgotten about it but recently it came back into my life with because of this …
What’s that? I hear you cry.
Well, it’s the pair of budgie smugglers in the ad.
And why
1. Colenso did it.
2. Levi – my creative partner – did it.
And if ever you wanted proof you were in the right place, it’s this.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Attitude & Aptitude, Authenticity, Comment, Corporate Evil, Fake Attitude, Purpose, Relevance, Resonance
Marketing is always trying to find a way to be ‘relevant’ to its customers.
Of course, the real reason for this is because many of them don’t care about their customers beyond what they’re spending their money on.
It’s for this reason we so much bandwagon jumping – where brands suddenly claim to care about issues they’ve never shown any interest in and, in some cases, directly contributed to the issue society is fighting against – because they need to keep that money rolling in.
It’s why we have so much ‘purpose’ being spouted in marketing decks all around the World and why so many brands appear schizophrenic as they switch their attention to whatever social issue they think will ‘optimise’ their return on illusion. I mean, purpose. Ahem.
Putting aside the fact that if a brand really was committed to their purpose, they wouldn’t be changing it in the blink of an eye … there are at least some brands who put in some effort … who actually invest some money into what they believe. However, there’s others who just look for the easiest way to lie.
What. The. Hell???
I mean, there’s greenwashing, but this isn’t greensplashing.
I particularly love how they claim to have ‘overlooked the possibility’ the naming could mislead the people.
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.
Nothing shows how little regard they have for their customers than using that excuse.
I mean, doing such a terribly shit thing is horrific … but using an excuse like that to ‘justify their actions’ shows how they literally don’t care.
They’re laughing at us.
They think we’re stupid.
So let’s prove them right by never buying one of their products and say we overlooked the possibility they wanted us to actually buy their shit.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Agency Culture, Attitude & Aptitude, Authenticity, Colenso, Comment, Creativity, Culture, Distinction, Marketing, Marketing Fail, Relationships, Relevance, Research, Resonance, Respect
When I joined Colenso, they organised some workshops for me to start having a deeper understanding with the Maori culture. It was – and is – amazing and I am so grateful.
In one of the classes, the professor said something that I thought was brilliant. While her analogy was about how many white people in New Zealand like to view New Zealand, it is so easily transferable to all nations.
While I’m probably paraphrasing her, what she said was this:
“We’re a world of fruit salad that governments, companies & media present and view as a smoothie.”
What’s terrible is adland is a major contributor to this.
Blending people and cultures to a bland, beige mess …
Saying a lot but telling you nothing.
Viewing individuality as an obstacle not a gift.
Which is why next time you write a brief or read an ad, it’s worth asking yourself … are you making fruit salad or a smoothie?
Filed under: Comment
This might be gaslighting by proxy, but it’s evil genius.
Enjoy your week.