Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Airports, Attitude & Aptitude, Creativity, Culture, Leadership, Management, Marketing Fail, Mediocrity, New Zealand, Planes, Relevance, Reputation, Singapore
This may be the most privileged posts I’ve ever written.
So for the last 19 odd years, I’ve spent a lot of time on planes. Mainly flying long haul. And because I’ve moved countries a lot, I’ve got to experience a whole bunch of different airlines.
As an aside … when we moved to NZ, I genuinely thought it would be the end of my plane habit, without realising that when you live on the other side of the planet – and have clients in Europe, the US and Asia – you’re going to spend a fuck load more times on planes, not less.
Yep, I’m an idiot.
Anyway, in the time I’ve been travelling, I’ve experienced it all.
Good airlines, bad airlines, questionable airlines.
I should point out that when I say bad or questionable – it’s never about the safety of the plane [bar one occasion in China and one in Portugal] it’s more to do with the service and/or the passengers on it. I mean, who can forget the time I woke up on Air Canada, flying to Toronto from Shanghai, and found a 7 year old pissing on my blanket while his Mum watched and did absolutely nothing. No, that is not a joke.
But one airline that has consistently been great has been Singapore Airlines.
Excellent planes. Excellent service. Excellent facilities.
Now, I don’t fly them as much as I obviously did when I lived there – so I was quite excited to be flying with when returning from a trip to Amsterdam.
The first leg was up to its usual quality, but the Singapore to NZ leg was a bit weird.
First of all they changed the gate at the last minute to a totally different terminal, which meant I ended up being 3 minutes away from missing my flight – which would have only been the 2nd time I’ve ever failed to get on my plane. Then, on boarding, I discovered it was possibly the oldest plane I’d ever seen Singapore Airlines fly. Admittedly not as old as the one I flew with Air Koryo – the North Korean state airline – but proportionally, the same.
So not a great start.
But what really got me was the service.
The people on board were their usual brilliant self, but when it came to lunch, this is what they gave me to eat my food with.
Jesus Christ, were they serving me a 4957 course lunch?
Now I appreciate I sound like a privileged prick here – and I did acknowledge that at the very beginning of the post – but while this may sound the epitome of ‘first world problem’, when you’ve experienced almost 20 years of attention-to-detail perfection from Singapore Airlines, these things stand out.
Worse, they get remembered.
Which is why companies need to remember that the service they offer creates the minimum standard for the experience customers expect and the more they try to cut corners, the more all that hard work and effort goes to waste.
I get some routes are less profitable than others.
I get there’s only a certain amount of planes available.
But as the father of a friend once told me, “the sooner you see your reputation as a cost, the sooner you lose your reputation.”.
Hopefully SIA work that out faster than it has taken adland.
Hello. I’m back.
And yes, I know you think my trip was basically a paid holiday – but I was actually working.
I know you don’t believe it, but that’s your issue not mine … ha.
Talking of issues not of your own making, a mate recently sent me this:
For those of you who don’t know who Chris Luxon is, he’s the NZ Prime Minister.
Without wanting to get into too much politics, he’s the leader of the National [Conservative] party … a ‘businessman’ … and was so desperate for the ‘top job’, he willingly formed an alliance leaders from parties whose views are, let’s say, less open or compassionate than the image the rest of the world has of NZ following Jacinda’s role as PM.
So basically, think Kiwi Boris … with less charisma and, to be fair, less lies.
I think.
I hope.
Now the fact he and his party got into government means many people here didn’t like Jacinda, Chris Hipkins [who replaced her] or Labour as a whole … and while their campaign was designed to raise tensions on issues such as immigration, environment and economy – as it seems is the approach for all National/Conservative/Republican parties around the world – the reality is he and National got elected fair and square.
Which is why this ad – and its real apparently – is both alarming and brilliant.
Alarming, because it is a new level of political aggression that is making more and more countries feel and behave like they’re in open civil war. And brilliant, because it’s a level of devious, underhand, once-you’ve-seen-it-you-can’t-forget-it evil, that you tend not to see from a Liberal/Labour party.
Well, I say that, but I don’t know who actually is behind it … but it’s safe to say it’s unlikely to be anyone associated with Chris Luxon or National.
Now I have no idea if this has been done before nor do I know if there is one also aimed at Labour’s leader, but given there is an old adage that states ‘Democrats want to be right but Republican’s want to win’ … whoever is behind this seems to have decided if you can’t beat them, join them.
Once upon a time, NZ did a tourism campaign called 100% Pure.
It was – and still is – the best tourism campaign of all time.
And while that is long gone, it seems it’s being revived under the new moniker of 100% Hate.
Which, I hope, is not the sort of porn you’ll see if you click on the Luxon link.
Better post tomorrow. Maybe. Hopefully. Unlikely.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Auckland, Brand Suicide, Crap Marketing Ideas From History!, Crap Products In History, Creativity, Dad, Experience, Imagination, New Zealand, Packaging, Perfume, Relevance, Unexpected Relevance
Over the years I’ve written a lot about scent companies – both for men and women, both good and bad. Or should I say, terrible.
And while it has been more focused on preposterous nature of their advertising – I mean, who can forget the car crash that was Gerard Butler’s ‘Man Of Tomorrow’ bollocks for Hugo Boss – I’ve covered everything from when Mont Blanc decided to go from ink to stink when Moschino thought the perfect bottle design to convey the sophistication of their scent was a detergent bottle to the absolute insanity of this.
DO NOT CLICK THAT LAST ONE IF YOU ARE AT WORK. INSTEAD GET A – ERRRRRM TASTE – OF WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT BY CLICKING HERE OR IF YOU ARE FEELING A BIT BRAVER, THEN YOU CAN CLICK HERE. BUT YOU PROBABLY STILL DON’T WANT TO DO THAT IF YOU’RE AT WORK.
Now, to be honest, nothing in the universe will ever beat that last example … but recently I did see something that wanted to give it a run for its money. Not in terms of smut, but stupid.
Now I admit, I’m not the biggest fan of the Friday 13th movies – or horror for that matter – but even if I was, I don’t know if I’d like to smell of it.
Though what the smell of it still is unknown.
Is it of corpses?
Is it of blood?
Is it of the desperation of whoever was behind this to try and make a quick buck.
On one hand, I am kinda-in-awe they did it because let’s be honest – the business case for it must be pretty niche. Plus they went all out on the packaging because it comes in a box designed to look like a VHS video tape.
However, if I can find this product in New Zealand – a place on the other side of the planet with only 5 million living here – then the peeps behind this product must have spent pretty big on it, which begs the question, WHO THE FUCK DID THEY THINK IS GOING TO BUY IT?
Well, according to the literature, it’s potential serial killers who think murder is fun. I quote:
Warner Bros Horror Friday The 13th Eau de Toilette is a fun and fearless scent that allows you to discover the safe deeper inner you. Comes boxed in a VHS to bring you back memories as well as scents. Perfect for any special occasion.
And they have the audacity to say it’s ‘perfect for any special occasion’.
Maybe it is if your special occasion is the homocidal murder of people at a kids camp, but for any other occasion, I’m not so sure.
Which reminds me of something my Dad once said to me.
“If you think people on the streets are crazy, try looking at people in the boardroom”
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Attitude & Aptitude, Authenticity, Colenso, Comment, Confidence, Culture, New Zealand
Late last year, I talked about a photo I was sent from when I was much younger.
I talked about how I looked like the mass murderer Chopper Read and that it scared the hell out of me because while I never was a looker – bar the photo above, on my first day at ‘big school’, albeit with a ‘school badge’ on my jacket that was the size of Africa – I never realised I was that visually challenged.
On one side that is to be expected, because there is a huge amount of research that has identified that our brain is designed to protect us from harmful truth – hence ‘rose tinted glasses’ is not purely delusional, but also biological – but still, it was pretty confronting.
However, once the initial shock passed, it was kind-of liberating because when you know that your youth wasn’t your golden age, you don’t really care about all that stuff and then you can embrace who you want to be rather than feel oppressed by who society expects you to be.
Which is my way of explaining – and justifying – why I recently went to work dressed like this …
I should point out that I thought I was going as Patrick Star … a character from SpongeBob SquarePants, however seeing this photo, I realise I went as the Pornhub version, because I am a giant penis.
I appreciate many of you have long thought I was a dickhead, but my god – this is bad.
HR violation bad … made worse by the purple ‘cow print’ lower half which, in a certain light, looks a big like old man testicles.
That said, I went to great effort to colour code my footwear to my outfit with pink socks and yellow Jordan’s, which may be the first time in my history I have been so co-ordinated. Just a shame I decided to save it for the time I dressed as the biggest dick since Elon Musk.
So to my colleagues, I wish to publicly apologise and – in my defence – point them to this post, to explain how they are really all to blame for this alarming lack of judgement.
Have a good day … that is, if you can burn that image from your mind.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Advertising, Agency Culture, Attitude & Aptitude, Audacious, BBH, Colenso, Colleagues, Comment, Confidence, Creative Development, Creativity, Culture, Management, Marketing, New Zealand, Provocative, Relevance, Resonance, Ridiculous, Wieden+Kennedy
I’ve always had a love/hate relationship with advertising awards.
Of course, it’s nice to have them … but for me, it’s always about who you are competing against and who the judges are who are deciding them.
Oh, and whether those who have won before, won with real work or ‘ultra-niche, ultra-limited edition’ one-offs.
Also known as scam.
You generally can tell when that shit happens because they tend to either:
1. Be a one-off from the clients normal approach to work.
2. Be a one-off from the normal output of the agency.
Fortunately, it is less than it used to be, but still more than it should.
That’s why the agencies who do it properly deserve more credit.
To win awards as a byproduct of the work you make rather than it be the focus of the work you make, is a noble cause.
There’s more of them than we often give credit for … and you can generally tell who they are by how long they’ve been able to play at that level.
A few years ago, I wrote about how W+K and BBH were brilliant examples of this.
How they proved the old adage ‘it’s easier to get to the top than to stay there’.
And it’s so true.
Because without wanting to take anything away from anyone who does well, being able to do it consistently is an even greater achievement.
I say this because I think Colenso is one of these places.
For over 50 years, we’ve consistently made work that has been recognised by the best in the world as some of the best in the world.
NZ has tended to do very well in this area … DDB, Saatchi, Special to name a few … but few have done it with the longevity and sustainability of Colenso.
And a big part of that is because of the culture it cultivates.
From our approach to the work we make to the people we hire to make it … at the heart of everything is a deep love and respect for the power of creativity.
Lots of people will say that.
Lots of agencies will say that.
But you find out who means it through the work that they consistently make.
And that is – like all the places who consistently do good stuff – one of the traits that reveal who we really are.
That doesn’t mean we’re the easiest place to work.
Because even though the place is full of good and talented creative people … it’s also a challenging, demanding, opinionated and provocative environment, because ultimately, we have 50+ years of standards and expectations to honour, live up to and try to push further.
As the picture at the top of this page – from 934843049 years ago – shows.
But what’s interesting is how we want those standards and expectations to manifest.
Because it’s not about playing to be accurate, it’s about doing the right thing in the most interesting, original and audacious ways.
Do we always get it right?
Nope.
But we always strive to get it right and that’s why we are consistently awarded at the highest level for work as varied [and effective] as turning beer into an alternative fuel for cars, creating a radio station for dogs, getting Rick and Morty to explain green energy to youth culture and making a radio campaign that doubled as an outdoor campaign that asked New Zealand to make a radio campaign … to name but a very few.
And while this post sounds unbelievably corporate toady … it’s my way of paying homage to my colleagues and, especially, my partners.
Now I could wax lyrical about Si – our CCO – because he’s not just horribly talented, he is possibly the nicest human I’ve ever worked with.
[Well, I say nice, but he has his moments of evil – but even then, he manages to deliver it with a niceness that makes every Disney character look like a bunch of pricks]
But the reality is, you’d expect the leader of Colenso to be brilliant … otherwise why the hell are they here.
Which is why who I really need to acknowledge is our MD – Ange – because she’s the Ringmaster of the whole Colenso circus.
It can’t be easy.
Not just because she has to deal with me – let alone sit next to me – she also has to work with a bunch of people thinking up ridiculous ideas that challenge and confront on every level.
Not just creatively … but in terms of time, simplicity and possibility.
Yet she manages it.
More than that, she would fight for the death to maintain it.
Which is why the thing that is often forgotten about the agencies who consistently make great work is not just the people behind it … but the people who make it possible.
The people who create the conditions for it to thrive.
From the MD’s and finance people to the IT and support staff.
But – and here is the critical thing – it’s more than them just doing their job well, it’s them doing their job through the lens of what the whole company is striving to do.
Because to paraphrase that famous story of the janitor who met President Kennedy …
They’re not working in a vacuum, immune from the needs and ambitions of everyone around them… they’re helping make the most audacious ideas get out the door.
Here’s to all of them. Every last fucking one of them.
With that, the first month of ’24 is done. And I can tell you, I’m as surprised as anyone that I decided to finish it in such an earnest, generous way.
Let’s hope February is less nice. Even I feel sick with it.