Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Confidence, Culture, Dad, Daddyhood, Education, England, Family, Happiness, Innocence, Insight, Jill, Love, Mum, Mum & Dad, Otis, Parents, Relevance, Resonance, Standards, Unexpected Relevance
As I’ve written before, I didn’t go to University. I knew pretty early on that I didn’t want to continue my formal education.
That doesn’t mean I didn’t/don’t like to learn, it just means I find it far more powerful when it’s not in an academic environment.
I still remember telling my parents my decision and being slightly scared.
They desperately wanted me to go so I was worried they would see this as a slight on them – which is absolutely not what it was meant to be.
They asked for my reasons and when I told them, they said that they would support my decision as long as I applied in case I changed my mind.
So I did.
And I got accepted.
But I was still sure not going was the right thing for me, so my parents – while obviously disappointed – supported my decision and never brought it up again.
Looking back now, I feel that must have been very hard for them.
At that point, going to university was the fast track to a career and yet – as another act of their love and confidence in me – they pushed me to follow the things that genuinely interested and excited me and hoped it would all work out.
I’d say it did.
But now I’m a dad and while Otis is only 3, the thought of education looms large.
Would I do the same thing as him?
Of course I want to help equip my son in the best way possible for the life he wants to lead and one of those ways is to provide him with a good education. But the fact is I’m vehemently opposed to private education and while general access schools can be very good, the reality is private tends to offer better opportunities simply because of the funding and the facilities … which leads to an interesting conflict.
What’s best for my son versus what’s true to me?
Given Otis is so young right now, the decision will ultimately be mine and his Mum’s, but once he’s older, what do I do if he chooses a path I feel is not in his best interests.
Sure, it worked out for me, but the World was different back then and then I saw the ‘god’ instagram above – a sentiment that was absolutely reinforced by our recent America In The Raw research – and realised that by the time he has to make some choices, he will be far more aware of what he needs to do to increase his odds of success than his Mum or me.
But then I realised something else …
It’s not just about acknowledging their view of their World will be better than yours, it’s also backing your parenting.
When my Mum and Dad supported my decision, they were ultimately supporting how they raised me.
They believed the values and smarts they’d instilled in me were the right ones to enable me to make the right choices … and while I know they would have been there if it all fell down, that sense of confidence and belief probably enabled me to go to places I might otherwise not have done. Places I might not otherwise have felt I deserved to be.
And that’s why backing your team is everything.
Of course you have to instill values and standards into them, but once that’s done, you have to back them including what they think is right – even if you don’t – because if that doesn’t happen, you’re literally stopping their potential rather than liberating it.
Thank you Mum and Dad. Again.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Childhood, Comment, Family, Friendship, Human Goodness, My Fatherhood, Otis
It’s Monday.
I know that’s pretty shit for all of us so I thought I’d do something nice for a change.
OK, I’m not really doing any of it … my son is … but if it affects you 1/1000th in the way it affected me, it will make your day a little sweeter.
Otis has a friend called Elodie.
Her parents – by pure chance – are English and we met them at our kids school.
Elodie adores Otis.
And Otis adores Elodie.
They operate at the same speed and frequency and while there’s the odd moment where one of them goes slightly off the rails, their affection for each other is obvious.
A few weeks ago we were all at the beach to celebrate another kids birthday [this is my life now]
Living so close to the beach is a real privilege and even though both kids are there most days, they still act like it’s their first time.
Anyway, we were there for Jack’s 3rd birthday and in-between birthday cake and opening presents, I saw Elodie and Otis walk to the gentle tide.
As they chatted to each other, I followed them from a little distance to give them space to continue playing in their own World when suddenly they did this …
There are many beautiful things in my life that have taken my breath away, but this was one of the most powerful.
Innocent.
Heartfelt.
Friendship.
Which is why as much as that lone surfer in the distance may believe they are riding upon life’s purest joy, I would like to say to them they are wrong and point them to the embrace of my son and his dear Elodie.
I think they would acknowledge I am right.
Happy Monday.
Thank you Otis and Elodie.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Brand Suicide, China, Comment, Crap Marketing Ideas From History!, Creative Development, Creativity, Culture, Deutsch, Differentiation, Food For Thought, Goodbye China, Hello America, Insight, Internet, Interviews, Marketing Fail, Martin Weigel, My Fatherhood, Otis, Paul, Planners, Planners Making A Complete Tit Of Themselves And Bless, Planning, Point Of View, Positioning, Pretentious Rubbish, Relevance, Resonance, Social Media, Standards, The Kennedys, The Kennedys Shanghai, Unexpected Relevance, Unplanned, Unprofessional Professional, Wieden+Kennedy
How is your 2018 going so far?
I know it’s still early days – but is it looking good or bad?
Well, if it’s looking positive, I’m about to ruin it for you and if it is looking dodgy, I’m going to help you solidify your opinion.
Why?
Well, a few weeks ago, a nice guy called Paul McEnany asked if he could interview me about my career.
While I’m sure his reasoning for his request was to help planners learn what not to do, my ego said yes even before my mouth did … and while the end result is the bastard love child of rambling randomness and base-level swearing, it’s the perfect way to justify your pessimism for 2018 or to ensure your optimism for the new year doesn’t get too high.
So go here and errrrrm, enjoy [if that’s the right word for it, which it isn’t] and after you’ve heard my crap, listen to the brilliant interviews with people like Gareth Kay, Russell Davies, Richard Huntingdon, Martin Weigel and the amazing Chris Riley because apart from being hugely interesting and inspiring, you’ll get the added bonus of [1] undeniable proof I’m a massive imposter and [2] the knowledge that if I can have some sort of semi-successful career in advertising, you certainly can.
You’re welcome.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Comment, Dad, Daddyhood, Jill, Mum, Mum & Dad, My Fatherhood, Otis
It’s the last day of the first week of blog posts for the new year.Congratulations, you’ve survived.
So I thought I’d end the week on a positive.
No, a real one.
You see there was recently read a Linkedin article asking people what piece of advice they would give to their children.
Obviously this is a big, big question because ultimately, there’s so many things you could say and want to say.
But then I realized the advice I got from my parents is still probably the best advice I could give.
Advice that not only prepares you for the life ahead, but prepares you to get the most out of what is there and who you are – which, when you come to think of it, is probably the best advice of all.
So with that, I pass onto Otis what my beloved parents passed on to me.
+ A life of fulfillment is more enjoyable than a life of contentment.
+ Be interested in what others are interested in.
+ Make your own mistakes not someone else’s.
I might not have managed to do them all, all the time, but those pieces of advice have helped me enjoy a life that – let’s face it – I don’t deserve to have, which might be the one thing I’ve done that my parents would be the happiest about.
So to Mum and Dad – thank you – you might not realize it, but you’ve given your grandson one of the most valuable bits of advice he’ll ever have.
Have a great weekend.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Family, Fatherhood, Love, Otis, Parents
That photo is of my son, Otis.
He is one of the best things that has ever happened to me.
He is cheeky, curious, kind, loving, beautiful and absolutely full of energy.
Now I’m sure most parents would describe their child like that, but based on a situation we experienced recently, it seems even other parents would regard Otis’ energy as being at another level.
Maybe it’s because he was restricted from going out in China because of the pollution.
Maybe it’s because he’s just loves being with other kids.
Maybe it’s because he is excited and curious about life.
Whatever it is, he can make the Energizer Bunny look like a sloth – and while we love seeing him run around and laugh – some other parents view this as a fault.
A few weeks ago, he was running around while some other kids were sat on the floor. He wasn’t bothering them, but in his excitement, he accidentally fell onto another child.
The reaction of both this other kid – and their parent – was extreme.
They acted like Otis had attacked them, even though he got up and [remember he’s only 2 1/2] said sorry and patted the child on the arm as a way of apologising. [We did the same … apologise I mean]
Apparently that wasn’t enough, because the parent came right up and ‘suggested’ Otis should be given a 2 minute time-out as punishment.
Fuck you!
Who the hell are you to try and dictate how we deal with our son?
Who the hell are you to try and curb his enthusiasm for life?
It was an accident. If it wasn’t, he would have been reprimanded, but he’s a sweet, caring, happy kid and all he did was fall over because his energy was running faster than his little chubby legs could go.
But as much as this parent fucked me off, it taught me a valuable lesson.
Before, when parents saw Otis running around like a happy lunatic, they would say things like, “He’s got a lot of energy hasn’t he?” and I would respond with a World-weary sigh and say something like, “You have no idea.”
But now I don’t.
Now I look at the person and say, “Yes, isn’t it awesome”.
Because it is.
As is my son.
And I’m not going to help a stranger feel better about their self-declared parental expertise by putting him down.