Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Childhood, Comment, Confidence, Daddyhood, Jill, Love, My Fatherhood, Otis, Parents, Paul, School
It seems literally a few months ago, since I wrote this post announcing Otis had come into the World, but this week, my little man starts school.
I’m not talking kindergarten – that he did in China, America and London – I mean proper school.
Reading … Writing … Arithmetic …
A journey that, in many ways, shapes and defines the future he is going to have.
I can’t believe it …
How did that happen so fast?
I’ve written it before, but seeing your kid grow up is both a blessing and a curse.
It’s a curse because they’re moments in their development where you just want them to stay exactly as they are.
When they are totally reliant on your love.
When they start using sounds to express how they’re feeling.
When you see them experience proper food for the first time.
When they start crawling and edge their way towards you.
Those first few words.
The first conversation.
The first steps.
At every stage, you want that moment to last forever but let it go because as they enter a new phase, there are even more new wonderful things you encounter.
It’s a fast moving train you both want to stop and to keep going exactly as it is.
And this week, the train finds another gear as Otis enters formal education.
I’ve written a lot about my views on this and how I am vehemently opposed to private education.
I don’t believe it should be a profit centre.
I do believe governments should be funding it because ultimately, it’s the foundation for the countries strength and health.
And while I know the school Otis starts tomorrow won’t be the school he finishes in – as we have bought our family home in a totally different area – I do know we intend to let him finally have a place he can feel settled in … a place where he can truly belong … because his Mum and I would like nothing more than him to meet friends that will be there throughout his life.
Like his Dad had with Paul, who are the kids in the picture at the top of this post.
So all that leaves me to say is this …
Enjoy your new adventure Otis.
Your Mum and Dad are so proud for the little boy you are.
And so excited for who you will become.
Love you.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Comment, Confidence, Culture, Daddyhood, Empathy, Goodbye America, Goodbye China, Jill, London, Love, My Fatherhood, Otis
A few weeks ago, Otis – my son – graduated from preschool.
I’ve got to be honest, I don’t quite get the preschool graduation thing.
Yes it’s a sort-of school, but it’s basically long playtime where you get to piss about with your mates – which is a bit like working in adland, but with less alcohol. Hopefully.
Anyway, whatever it is, Otis graduated which means the next stage is him embarking on his journey of real education.
I can’t believe it.
It seems only 5 minutes ago he was born.
But there he was … graduating for the first time in his life.
I don’t mind telling you I look at my little boy with such pride and love.
He has gone through a lot …
Living in 3 radically different countries – exemplified by the above photo shows him born in Shanghai, starting preschool in LA and finishing it all in London – saying goodbye to people of huge significance in his life, having to start things over again and again, watching his Dad crumble after seeing his beloved mum die, going through an operation … and yet through it all, he has approached life with a sense of optimism, mischief, happiness and curiosity that would put many older people to shame.
Part of this is because he’s just a loving and compassionate kid. Part of this is because he has family who bloody adore him. But part of this is the insane kindness and generosity that people around the world have shown him simply because they have watched him grow through my billions of social media pics.
The reality is Otis has brought more to my life than I could ever have imagined.
Not just in terms of love and happiness … but also in terms of lessons for life.
He has made everything unquestionably richer for both his amazing Mum and me and so as I tried not to cry as I watched him get his significant – but utterly pointless – certificate, I felt insanely proud of him.
Not for what he has achieved, but for who he is.
Congratulations Otis, you’re an epic little boy.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Authenticity, Comment, Creativity, Dad, Daddyhood, Emotion, Jill, Love, Mum & Dad, My Fatherhood, Otis, Parents
So today is my last post for over a week as I am off to the US [again].
And while that news might make you happy, today makes me happy for totally different reasons.
You see later today, my wonderful little boy, Otis, takes part in a theatre production.
For the last few months, he has been going to a drama class with other kids his age … and to say he loves it, is an understatement.
He comes home singing songs.
His vocabulary has noticeably evolved.
He’s using his imagination in new ways.
He is even projecting his voice to new levels.
Though on this last point, there are some disadvantages given Jill sent me this text as they were sat on the bus on their way to pre-school last week …
OK … OK … you can wipe the smiles off your faces now thank you.
I know it’s just a kids show.
I know it will be a bit ramshackle.
I know there may be tears and laughter.
But that’s what makes it brilliant.
Not from a ‘I get to laugh at a bunch of kids’ sense, but from a ‘look at those kids discovering the impact they can have on others’.
But of course, from a personal perspective, seeing my son express his creativity while being part of something bigger is going to be a massive thrill.
Quite frankly, I don’t care how he performs as long as he enjoys himself.
He wanted to do this – there was absolutely no push or pressure from us – and so all we care about is him having fun and seeing his parents support him.
That said, I hope it’s not like the first ever performance I did.
Christmas 1976.
The school nativity play at Heymann Primary School.
I was a rabbit. OK, not a pivotal role, but one that gave valuable context to the other ‘actors’.
However just before I was due to go on, Mrs Staples – or it could have been Mrs Berry – asked me to swap jumpers [Mine was a white one with red stripes in boxes, where hers was pure white] for some reason with Rebecca Baldwin.
After that last minute change, I went out on to the stage to a packed assembly hall full of parents sitting on very small seats trying to jostle their way to the front so they could snap off a few pics with their cameras.
Now imagine my pain – as I looked though my rabbit mask – seeing my parents proudly looking at Rebecca, thinking it was me.
They did this through the whole play and I can still see the look of shock on their faces when we took off their masks and they saw their little boy had become a little girl.
To be honest, if that happened with Otis, I’d probably find it funny … but overall, I am incredibly excited to see him perform today. Seeing him happy and free is one of the most beautiful things in my life. It’s why the schooling thing is quite hard because British schools are pretty strict and we want one with a much greater creative syllabus.
But we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it …
Most important for me today is to see my little boy have the time of his life, which – as I’m sure most parents will agree – is the thing we wish for them most in the World.
What a great way to head off out on a business trip.
Thank you Otis.
See you in 10 days.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Comment, Culture, Daddyhood, Diversity, Education, Emotion, Empathy, England, Family, Fatherhood, Happiness, Innocence, Insight, Jill, My Fatherhood, Otis, Parents, Prejudice, Resonance, Standards
I have written a lot about how we are bringing up Otis.
What we want for him, what we want him to value.
I have also written about the education we want for him.
A none-religious, state school that celebrates creativity as much as the more traditional academic pursuits.
Sadly I know there are many people out there who think we are mad for the choices we make, but as I have also written, my advice to them is to look after their own kids upbringing and leave ours to us.
That said, following these ideals is not easy.
Apart from the simple issue of access, the reality is most schools and kids companies focus on structure, stereotypes and grades because that is what most parents – and Governments – seem to value most of all, so for us to go outside of that takes effort and commitment.
None of this means we don’t want Otis to have a quality education – of course we do – it’s just that when it comes to what we think ‘education’ means, we see it going beyond the importance of reading, writing and maths.
We want his school to help him develop a love of learning.
Give him the ability to practice critical thinking.
An openness and comfort to express himself openly and creatively.
But there’s something more – something we feel very strongly about – which in part is one of the reasons we’re against religious and private schools.
You see we want him to learn that stereotypes limit, control and create prejudice.
That just because you’re a different gender or come from a different heritage or have a different sexual preference doesn’t mean you can’t aspire to – or achieve the same level as – anyone else.
And while it’s a small thing in the big scheme of things, it is the reason why I love that Otis’ school had a black Santa visit them last Christmas.
Of course Otis didn’t care, comment or even probably notice … but for the other little kids who come from different backgrounds, they saw a face that could give them comfort, confidence and courage about who they are, where they come from and what they can achieve and who wouldn’t want a school that teaches kids – all kids – that.
Education is so much more than just grades and while this is not all of the schools responsibility, it is part of their responsibility.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Comment, Daddyhood, Family, Jill, Mum, Mum & Dad, Otis, Parents
As I wrote yesterday, this is a big week in our household as Otis starts school.
Proper school.
In fact, he starts it in a few hours time.
Yes, today!!!
And while this is going to be a journey that will be filled with excitement and drama … tears and cheers … [and that’s just how his Mum and Dad will be when we wave him off later today] I had a glimpse of what might be in store for him in a way that took my breath away.
A few weeks ago, I wrote about how Otis has graduated from preschool.
Well from that day, Otis had this photo taken.
I saw it for the first time recently and I don’t mind telling you it stopped me in my tracks.
Not just because he is in full graduation gear – something his old man didn’t come close to achieving – but because of how much I see traces of my mum and me when we were young.
I wish Mum could see it, she would be chuffed to bits.
Just like I am.