Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Corporate Evil, Crap Campaigns In History, Fake Attitude, Insight
So Singtel – the Singaporean telco giant – have made an ad about long distance love.
I’m sure it’s meant to highlight how their technology can make even the greatest distances feel invisible … but for me, the story is actually about a guy who fucks his girlfriend from going after her dream job in New York by guilt-tripping her into going back to Singapore because he wants to watch the football on TV. Or something.
Now I know some people in Asia have some very screwed-up attitudes towards gender equality, but this is taking the piss.
Now I appreciate I might be going a bit over-the-top on all this, but for me, the endline shouldn’t be …
“For every moment between goodbye and hello”
… it should be …
Singtel: for men who pretend to be sensitive but are bastards.
Anyway, have a look and tell me what you think. I am sure Cindy Gallop will agree with me.
Filed under: Comment, Corporate Evil, Crap Marketing Ideas From History!, Cunning, Devious Strategy
A few weeks ago I wrote about the British Government’s shortsightedness in deciding NOT to name their new £200 million research ship, Boaty McBoatface.
As was expected, they went with ‘Sir David Attenborough’.
However, in a bid to appease popular opinion, they decided the onboard sub, would be given that name.
No seriously, read this …
Now while we could sit back and celebrate a small win for the people, the fact of the matter is:
+ The momentum for Boaty McBoatface has gone, which means so has the potential for this boat to help solve environmental conditions rather than just report on them.
+ Surely it should be called Subby McSubface?
Which all goes to show, the Government we elect – or should I say, the majority elect – don’t give a fuck about us, happily treating us as fools by giving us ‘small wins’ to occupy us as they destroy everything that helps the majority of society cope, hope and function.
Jesus, this is waaaaaay too political for a Monday morning.
On the positive, I’m off to Tokyo and LA this week, so this will be the last post till Friday.
[George, Pete, Baz … prepare for me to demand dinner. On your dime]
I know I’ve said that before and then haven’t been able to resist writing something in-between, but I’m actually going to be super-busy.
No honestly.
Oh god, why am I writing it, it’s not like anyone cares. Or even reads what I write.
Till Friday then …
Filed under: Brand Suicide, Chinese Culture, Corporate Evil, Crap Campaigns In History, Crap Marketing Ideas From History!, Crap Products In History, Marketing, Marketing Fail
I love China.
My time here has been one of the most exciting, interesting – and, I have to be honest, challenging – times of my life.
I will always love China and will always defend it from the prejudice they experience every day at the hands of foreign media and companies.
But there are some things here that I loathe.
Things that does the country harm.
Things that don’t actually represent what the majority think and yet validates the prejudice that other countries feel.
I wrote about one of these things recently, with the launch of ‘sports brand’, Uncle Martian.
But last week something even worse happened.
This.
I have to be honest, the moment I saw the first scene, I feared I knew what was going to happen.
And then it got worse that I ever imagined.
Apart from being utterly disgusting and distasteful, it’s an total blight on China’s international reputation and – it pains me to say it – so it should be.
I cannot believe that a nation with such strong censorship rules allowed this through.
I literally cannot fathom it.
It’s stupidity at a level that is beyond comprehension.
And what about the poor black guy in the ad? How desperate for money or fame must he have been to allow himself to be in this shit.
And the other actors … what the hell were they thinking?
And don’t even get me started on the brand who actually agreed to putting this thing out.
[This is what they said about it, which smacks of someone freaking out they’ve been “caught” by global media even though it’s pretty obvious they thought this would be a quick way for a small brand to get big attention]
I’m literally struggling to make sense of it. But I guess that’s because there is no sense to this … it’s racism on a level that beggars belief.
I hope the people who made it … approved it and commissioned it are all named, shamed and made to pay the price of their disgracefulness because what they have just done is promote hatred as well as damage China’s international reputation.
Do I think those people will care?
Probably not because otherwise they wouldn’t have done it … but I hope the Government do.
I hope the hundreds of millions of citizens who don’t think like this do.
And I hope they show it through fines and product boycotting. [They’re already expressing their disgust through social media]
Look, I’m not going to deny China has racism within the culture.
Sadly, most countries do.
Ironically, I have always felt their worst opinions are aimed at others from Asian countries rather than those from the West. In fact a black friend of mine who lived in China, once told me he felt it wasn’t that China didn’t like black people, they just don’t like anything different and to them, he’s just different.
Of course that is no excuse for this shit nor does it make it any better.
Frankly I am devastated about this. Devastated that these attitudes still exist. Devastated there are people who don’t think it is wrong to make an ad featuring this as their ‘storyline’. And devastated China has just taken a backward step in the minds of many across the World.
I would love to meet the people who did this and commissioned this and literally smash them in the fucking face.
They’re beyond racist. They’re stupid.
But then, when a country that claims to represent the Free World can have a presidential candidate who is the antithesis of it, I fear stupid is winning.
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Just to make sure no one is stupid enough to suggest only the Chinese are racist, watch this …
Yes, I know it reinforces the misguided belief China just copies what others have done rather than create it’s own thing, but that’s obviously, not the point I want to make.
Racism is everywhere and unless we fundamentally deal with it, society is on the fast track to devolution. A good way to start might be to get everyone to watch this.
Then stop Donald Trump.
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PS: I found it fascinating than in the recent Austrian elections, the narrow loser – a far right candidate – took the loss with grace. Despite supporters claiming he had been cheated, he knocked that talk on the head. I don’t – and never will – support his viewpoints, but I respect his acceptance. Now if only he could do that beyond just an election result. Trump take note.
Filed under: Agency Culture, Attitude & Aptitude, Brand Suicide, Corporate Evil, Culture, Embarrassing Moments, Entertainment, Marketing Fail
SapientNitro
The song that launched a thousand comments. None of them good.
Hakuhodo Singapore
Using the power of mandatory wackiness to explain they’ve moved offices.
Mindshare Europe
Taking a song about working hard for the money and showing they’re doing anything but that.
BBDO China
Highlighting the sexism of adland is alive and well. And yes, this is apparently a real video from people in the agency, but – as I understand it – not from the agency.
Ogilvy Greece
Showing that sometimes, honouring someone is actually killing them.
I wanted to put up the pitch video of Leo Burnett Sydney, simply because Todd Sampson – a man I am not very keen on – looks a tool, but they have removed it from the internet with the same efficiency and effectiveness as the CIA black ops team.
I also had Y&R Shanghai’s recent video of them singing/murdering Queen’s ‘Don’t Stop Me Now’ as part of their 30th birthday celebrations. However I stupidly put it on Facebook and tagged someone I know who was in it, which meant they could see what I was up to and quickly took it down. I’m gutted because it was an excellent piece of credibility suicide.
But putting all that aside, there are also videos that show why society might not take business or government that seriously either.
First of all, a genuine classic, where Bank of America execs take U2’s song ‘One’ and repurpose it to celebrate the take over and integration of financial organisation MBNA.
Part of me likes it simply because it must have utterly fucked off Bono for both musical and moral issues.
[Ignoring the fact Bono is one of the biggest champagne socialists on the planet]
And then – saving possibly the best for last – the utterly brilliant [for utterly bad reasons] Singapore Media Development Authority ‘rap’.
Even after all these years it brings a smile to my face.
Of course, it also makes me cringe like a David Brent music video but as comedy goes, it’s sheer gold.
Look I think it’s great when agencies and companies are excited about what they do, but these videos have nothing to do with that … they’re all contrived and cynical attempts to try make others think they’d be fun to work for or with.
Except it doesn’t work, because mandatory wackiness doesn’t fool anyone. Except the mediocre.
I have no idea why ‘song and dance’ has become the format to express your ‘human side’, but I can’t help but think that if you have to do this to show how much fun you are, you’re not doing your day-to-day job correctly.
Seriously agencies and companies. Stop it. Just stop it.
You’re not just embarrassing yourselves, you’re actually undermining a whole industries credibility.
Who the fuck will want to pay a premium for someone they’ve seen sing and dance like a one-legged drunk?
Worse, you all have some incredibly talented people in your organisations. This sort of stuff makes them want to die rather than to do the best for you.
But – and it’s a huge but – if you absolutely have to do it, then have the good grace to do it in private rather than use it as some not-very-well-disguised sales pitch … either for your company or for your corporate toadiness.
To paraphrase someone who once said something very unkind about Billy Joel’s and Christie Brinkley’s daughter, you all end up looking like you have the ‘face of her father and the voice of her mother’
And if anyone thinks I’m being a dick for showing companies at their worst, then I give you this as a means of compensation.
Trust me, if you thought what you had seen before was bad, this will kill you.
_____________________________________________________________________________________
PS: If you know of any more agency shame videos, I’d love to see them, Ta.
Filed under: Brand Suicide, Comment, Corporate Evil, Crap Campaigns In History, Crap Marketing Ideas From History!, Crap Products In History, Creativity, Fake Attitude, Marketing, Marketing Fail
So this is a sort-of continuation to my post about Peggy – the pointless tech peg.
And lets not forget the ridiculous buckwheat allergy tattoo.
While both of those have come from JWT’s Asia-Pacific offices, the issue is far more widespread than that.
So while this post is coming out today, it was actually written a while ago.
The day after I came back from judging an effectiveness award.
The day after I managed to get a submission chucked out. For being scam.
Everyone – bar the representative of the agency behind it – knew it was scam.
And yet, I was the only one who said it.
The only one.
And the only reason I got it removed is because I pointed out that based on their submission, they had failed to achieve the goals they claim they were asked to do on behalf of their client.
Now I’m not blaming the co-judges.
Nor am I trying to big myself up.
I just hate that this shit continues to happen.
And from the same bloody agencies, in the same bloody region, every bloody year.
[Since the last post, we’ve seen the launch of a whole host of campaigns with ‘questionable’ motivation. McCaan, Cheil, BBDO to name but a few]
The thing is I don’t actually have any problem with an agency wanting to show off their creativity by helping those who need help.
In fact I think that’s ace.
However, when they claim their actions are part of some genuine ‘business relationship’ with clear commercial imperatives, then I have a problem with it.
Look, I don’t want to screw anyone over or get anyone in trouble, but the way I see it is the people doing this – or more specifically, the people forcing their offices to do this – are basically trying to ruin mine, and anyone else who works in advertising’s, livelihood and so while I accept I’ll never be able to make it stop, I can try to make it a bit more difficult.
Or said another way …
I can try and make it a bit more beneficial for any NGO/Charity/Small Business that gets pulled into this annual farce.
The idea is simple.
No agency can enter a creative or effective award on behalf of an NGO, charity or business spending less than US$5000 per annum on marketing unless they can prove 3 years of continuous work … with each year covering a period of no less than 5 months.
That’s it.
I appreciate it won’t change things in the big picture … I know some of the guilty parties will find ways around it … but if we’re going to have to put up with this bullshit, let’s make sure agencies are doing something that gives back, rather than takes more away.
I’m sure there’s other ideas, other suggestions, that would be far more powerful [from creating categories that simply ‘celebrate agency initiatives’ to insisting all ‘effectiveness award winners’ are then audited by an external, independent force] … however as I appreciate that some of these NGO, charities and small business need all the help they can get … I feel this idea would aid their goals while forcing agencies to be a bit more engaged beyond just the 3 months leading up to the Cannes submission deadline.
So if you agree – or have another idea – I’d love to hear from you.