Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Communication Strategy, Crap Marketing Ideas From History!, Culture, Customer Service, Marketing Fail, Technology
American companies – like every other country in the World – love automated telephone systems.
To actually get to speak to a real human, is harder than earning a PHD in astrophysics.
But what makes me laugh is how they try so so hard to make it sound like you’re talking to a real person when it’s painfully obvious you’re not.
However, in America, it has reached new heights.
I was organizing Direct TV and was having to repeat my answer to every question asked by the ‘automated human’ because it doesn’t understand British accents when – finally – it accepted my answer.
Imagine my surprise when immediately after, I heard the sound effect of a person typing.
Seriously, it was trying to suggest they were literally inputing my answer into their system.
If that wasn’t mental enough, the sound they used sounded awfully like a typewriter from the 1920’s.
Apart from the fact that a supposed high-tech company shouldn’t feel embarrassed about not using real people, if they really believe genuine human interaction is more desirable for customers than a computer, then HIRE SOME FUCKING HUMANS.
Another example where a consultancy has come in to improve efficiency and ignored reality.
Filed under: Attitude & Aptitude, Communication Strategy, Corporate Evil, Crap Marketing Ideas From History!, Marketing Fail
Back in March I wrote that APAC Insider Magazine had nominated Cynic for an Australian award, despite us ceasing to be a legal entity in 2010.
Well, today I got an email telling me ‘we were still in the running’ and they would be sending details for the award decision and ceremony.
Of course it’s all a load of bollocks, but imagine if you were a small company and thought you were honestly up for an award, you’d probably do whatever they asked because when you’re starting out, you’re continually looking for anything that reaffirms your decision to go it alone.
As I’ve written before, starting your own company is one of the best things you can ever do, but the journey – especially at the beginning – is incredibly fragile and this sort of thing has the potential to bring it all down.
Of course, there’s an argument it could also lift some people up … but if you win an award from a magazine who wants to nominate a company that died 7 years ago, you have to ask if the ‘award’ is something you really want to be associated with.
So, given these fuckers are exploiting the insecurity of small businesses, I’ve decided to give them a taste of their own medicine.
Sure, I’m going to continue going along with their ‘award’ – mainly because I’m genuinely interested to see how far their con goes on – but I’m going to do something else.
I can’t go into specifics right now, but let’s just say APAC Insider Magazine have received an email announcing their nomination for the International Magazine Publishers ‘Promotion of the Year’ and we’re going to see how they like a taste of their own medicine.
#PaybackIsGlorious
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Communication Strategy, Crap Campaigns In History, Creativity, Culture, Perspective, Wieden+Kennedy
So yesterday – on Linkedin – I found this posted on my feed …
Now putting aside the fact I no longer work at Wieden, the fact is that part of the reason WK is so special is because it doesn’t have an abundance of people who have – or want to have – an MBA.
Wieden is born from a desire to use creativity to do it’s fighting.
That ranks higher than absolutely everything and anything else.
Now I should point out that I am not suggesting someone with an MBA isn’t creative, however that qualification does mean you have a greater focus on business than creativity and that ultimately flies in the face of Wieden’s beliefs.
Of course WK are savvy at business and Mr W is most definitely a business guy.
However unlike many in the ‘commerce World’, they want to grow through creative excellence not ‘optimization’.
Which is why I found this ad so weird.
Has Willamette had a lot of Wieden people there before?
Or had a lot of interest from them?
Or is the reason they are offering such a huge financial incentive means they want them because it will benefit them as much as the student?
Even though a recent decision at WKSH means there are some people who – in my opinion – could do with some basic lessons in how to successfully build a business – the reality is this ad shows how little Willamette know, rather than how much.
Filed under: Attitude & Aptitude, Comment, Creative Brief, Creative Development, Creativity, Cunning, Marketing
I survived my first July 4th.
To be honest, it wasn’t that difficult given it was basically spending the day eating hamburgers wrapped in stars and stripes napkins.
In fact, I’m quite looking forward to next years already.
Anyway, when I lived in Sydney, there was this myth about someone called ‘trough boy’.
The legend goes that during the Mardi Gras festival, he would wrap himself in clingfilm, lie in the trough of pub urinal and beg people to piss all over him.
I never found out if it was true, but I bring this up because recently – while seeing George at Google – I saw this in their toilets. [Sorry, I mean ‘bathrooms’]
Now you might be wondering what I’m talking about – and I accept it’s not nearly as cool as the million other posts I’ve written about toilets – but what struck me was the high level of branding on this anti-splash toilet aid.
OK, so it works on a similar principal to the ‘fly’ that a Swedish airport painted on their urinals so men would aim their piss at it rather than let it fly all over the place [which was costing them a fortune in cleaning bills] but I must admit seeing their brand name proudly embossed on their product feels strange.
Actually scrap that, what feels weird is their name/logo looks like it suits a tech company more than a hygiene company … which says more about my prejudices than it does about them.
And so I decided to look into them and found out AirWorks is a product, not a brand and it’s made by a company called Hospeco who – if you look at their website – have an image much more in keeping with what I would imagine them to be.
And where am I going with all this?
Well, as normal, nowhere except to say in a world where brands are absolutely petrified of incurring any negative commentary from society, imagine being a brand where your objective is to literally have society piss on you.
If that wouldn’t lead to the greatest creative work ever, I don’t know what would.
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Attitude & Aptitude, Comment, Crap Marketing Ideas From History!, Design, Marketing Fail, Packaging
Reasons To Believe, or RTB for short.
Of course they’re super important, but a few years ago, I realized that clients felt they were important for different reasons than agencies.
For us, it’s about proof. Something tangible we can use to help build our ideas off.
Of course it’s best when it’s something unique, but as long as it’s true, that will do.
But for clients, it’s different.
Sure, they know it helps sell their product to their audience, but it’s also important to them for self-validation reasons.
Imagine you’d spent 3 years of your life making Post-It notes slightly more sticky. You’d want to feel that was worth it wouldn’t you … so when an agency comes back with an idea that doesn’t focus on the importance of ‘stickiness’, you’d feel all your hard work was wasted. So you’d push back.
And back.
And back again.
And even though it leads to fucking awful advertising, you’d be happy because for you, this isn’t about selling the product, it’s about you feeling less shit that a proportion of your life was spent on making a piece of paper slightly more sticky.
I experienced this quite recently – when I was in China.
For weeks we had issues with a client on a particular idea before we discovered he was the person behind the design of a small element of the brand and he felt we were ignoring it … which translated to him feeling we were ignoring him.
Ego can be a great thing.
It can give you the impetus to push you forward. Try new things. Explore new standards.
It can also fuck you up.
Make you lose sight of the bigger picture. Or any picture for that matter.
Which is probably what happened to the guys who had to do the packaging for the brown packing tape.
And why I love the absolutely correct comment from Mike Jennings [courtesy of John Dodds]
If that wasn’t enough, here’s something else to blow your mind.
I am on holiday on Monday for 2 days.
A work holiday and a national holiday.
Bet you thought my days of free holiday blagging were over, didn’t you.
Well you thought wrong, because it is July 4th … a day I will soon grow to love.
And with that, I’ll see you Wednesday y’all.