The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]


Career Lessons From My Dad. And A 97 Year Old.

When I was about to begin working for the first time, my Dad sat me down and said, “be generous, be kind, but never be a pushover”.

What he was basically telling me was I should always listen and learn … but I shouldn’t blindly follow what someone has told me without asking questions and exploring or voicing my own thoughts and ideas.

Nothing reinforced this than my first ever client meetings.

I was 19 and in a room with very senior and experienced clients.

After it happened, my boss called me in to ‘have a chat’.

He wanted to know why I’d been so quiet throughout the meeting when normally – as my Dad had told me – I kept asking questions as I wanted to learn more and to start to form my own perspective on things.

I told him I was worried I’d say something stupid so felt it best to keep my mouth shut … and that’s when he gave me 3 pieces of advice that not only changed my career, but that I pass on to anywho who feels in a similar situation.

1. When you’re young you’re not expected to have answers so you should exploit the chance to ask whatever you want while you’ve got it.

2. You’ll find out if your views are stupid or valid by speaking up … and you’ll find out from the most qualified people in the room, which is worth its weight in gold.

3. Remember you were hired because we believe in you. So while you might not always be right, we trust any question or opinion you have comes from the right place and with a desire to be useful and make a positive difference.

And while I’d like to think that the response I got is what everyone would get, you just have to read the stories on Corporate Gaslighting to realise what I was being encouraged to do – by my boss and Dad – is not what many are encouraged to do.

In fact, I’d go as far as to say in many cases, it’s not even tolerated.

You’re called a trouble maker.

Not a team player.

A maverick.

Which, of course, is all kinds of rubbish [not to mention debilitating in terms of personal development, standards and reputation and quality of work] but it seems to be what a lot of modern corporate culture often expects – no, scrap that – demands.

But there is good news.

Because if you find yourself in this exact position, you can either read this post I wrote years ago about how to be Freddie Mercury in the boardroom orread the letter below and see how 97 year old Mary Grant proves it’s never to late to change.

We never needed more Mary’s.

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