The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]


The Power Of Pettiness …

Of all the types of revenge you can get, petty revenge is one of my favourites.

The beauty of it is that it’s petty. Meaning it’s for something the aggressor doesn’t even realise they have done. At least not until they experience the act of revenge.

The other wonderful thing is that the pettiness often extends to the act of revenge.

In most cases it’s about forcing some sort of ‘inconvenience’ upon the victim … even if organising it took longer than the actual inconvenience lasted.

It’s why the question asked of many revenge makers is, “was it worth all that time just to do that?”

And almost universally, the answer is “yes … it most definitely was”.

Over the years I’ve embarked on a reign of petty revenge terror. Seeking to even the score against people who have either inadvertently- or consciously – tried to fuck me or a mate over.

This has resulted in all manner of acts.

From stealing a single wheel from their desk chair so it was annoyingly lopsided … to having stickers printed so I could put the word “last” over all their out-of-date ‘agency of the year’ posters … to placing a ‘honk if you hate the police’ bumper sticker to the back of their car to having badges made that said “I’m a sexist twat” that we sent to every male boss who had harassed my female friends to – in the very old days – changing the keys around on their laptops in the knowledge they couldn’t touch type so every time they wrote words like ‘they’, it would type a very different word.

I would like to point out 3 things:

1. They all deserved it.
2. This was all a very, very long time ago.
3. I’m much more sensible these days.

Well, I say that, but when we lived in London, a neighbour denied they had taken delivery of my Amazon order – despite me being sent photographic evidence of them accepting it – so I spent 2 days signing them up to every catalogue I could find and I hope they’re still getting them. I added a nice touch by addressing it to, ‘Ima Lyer-Antheef’.

But compared to my friends, I’m still an amateur. The stuff they’ve done is incredible in it’s pettiness and time consumption.

There’s one involving a famous cereal manufacturer – that I can only say when on my death bed – that still raises a smile even though it occurred 16 years ago.

But all that pales into insignificance compared to this …

They say heroes wear capes.

Well sometimes they wear their pettiness on their sleeve.

All bow down to a true master at work. Bravo. Bravo. Bravo.


20 Comments so far
Leave a comment

Describe Rob Campbell without saying Rob Campbell.

Comment by Bazza

Excellent.

Comment by George

You realise I take this as a massive compliment???

Comment by Rob

That’s because you’re twisted.

Comment by Bazza

Has there ever been a more perfect comment?

Comment by Lee Hill

Case in point. Robert’s idea to counter a competitive airline when they were attempting to push our airport placement. We could never have done it, but I admit to secretly wanting to.

Comment by Lee Hill

What was that?

Comment by Pete

Hahahahaha … I know EXACTLY what you’re talking about.

Comment by Rob

Not for public consumption.

Comment by Lee Hill

On brand for anything Rob was behind.

Comment by Bazza

“Much more sensible.”

The ultimate overpromise, underdeliver?

Comment by Pete

Potentially. Not always.

But yeah … probably the majority of the time.

Comment by Rob

Probably?

Comment by Bazza

The badge explains why Jemma was so excited when we caught up. I knew it could not be because she was seeing me.

Comment by George

Hahahahahaha … always self aware.

And while I can’t comment on whether Jemma was one of the people who inspired the creation of the ‘twat’ badge, I know for a fact she was fully behind the idea.

Also – good news – no one who worked at cynic was named as a possible badge beneficiary. Phew.

Comment by Rob

The beauty of pettiness is it leaves memories rather than scars.

Comment by George

That’s bloody eloquent. Hahaha

Comment by Rob

Thank you for conveying such surprise.

Comment by George

your pettiness was the only thing that saved you from me hating you.

Comment by andy@cynic

Sorry for being unrelated. I am asking this question “anonymously” (as I don’t want the other people in the industry know). If you are approached for a role at an organisation “notoriously” for profiting from gambling, make a lip service about promoting responsible gambling (at the most donating money to various charities and donating to orgs that provide gambling addiction therapies), and helping the government to bypass elected lawmakers for controversial government (ass-kissing-the-top) initiatives, would you decline it? I have never felt so uninterested, almost to the point of feeling quite a strong resistence, for interviews. This is an article from Financial Times if you’re interested in findingout what I’m talking about: https://www.ft.com/content/5ca456c0-6fb6-11e8-92d3-6c13e5c92914

Comment by Frau




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