The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

I Lied …

Yes, I know I said I’d finished writing this blog for the year, but someone sent me something that has compelled me to write one more rant.

Besides, I’m in advertising … so you shouldn’t expect us to be honest.


Anyway, I honestly don’t know if you will consider this a Christmas gift or horror, but you will always remember it … of that, I am absolutely sure.

So remember ages ago I said that the Gerard Butler manifesto for Hugo Boss was one of the worst things ever written?

Well, it still is … but this is definitely pushing it for first place.

The only reason Gerard wins, is because I think – or should I say, I hope – the people behind this are trying to take the piss.

I must admit, I have a niggling feeling that might not be the case – I worry, they were inspired by Gerard rather than want to ridicule it – but it’s Christmas and so I’m willing to give them the benefit of the doubt … especially because their website features a video where they definitely have a twinkle in the eye about what they’re doing.

However, if this was written in January, there’s no way I’d be so gracious and I’d be having a aneurysm explaining why this sort of thing represents the the worst of advertising … contrived self importance mixed with a large dollop of contrived shock value.

Or said another way … the strategy that got Donald Trump elected.

Seriously, there are so many other ways they could have done this.

So many ways they could have made it fun and less cringeworthy.

But no, they decided to follow the same path as that aftershave that supposedly smells of a sweaty vagina.

A path that says as much about the people behind the brand as those who will embrace it.

Anyway, have a look at what the hell I’m talking about.

It is most definitely NOT SUITABLE FOR WORK … but you have to see it.

Then try and enjoy your Christmas, wherever you are.

Or just go back to what was supposed to be my last post and pretend this never happened.


what the fucking fuck is that.

Comment by andy@cynic

you writing a fucking load of bollocks when you promised youd stopped is bad enough but this shit? 2017 is doomed before it has fucking started. i fucking hate you campbell. good job.

Comment by andy@cynic

Good job?

Comment by Bazza

sort of evil shit i hold in high fucking esteem.

Comment by andy@cynic

A talking cock. Perfect metaphor for this blog.

Comment by DH

In future, I would prefer it if you kept your promises. Especially if it means I can avoid seeing rubbish like this.

Comment by Lee Hill

I know … I know … but I just couldn’t resist. Sorry.

Comment by Rob

I’ve literally seen it all now.

Comment by Bazza

good line. who wrote it for you?

Comment by andy@cynic

Well that has left a bad taste in my mouth.
Happy Christmas Robert.

Comment by George

Aim to please …

Comment by Rob

From the people who brought you the royal box innuendo in their Paddy Power ads. They generate a lot of sniggers and media about the various jokes but I cpntinually wonder if it’s ever connected to the respective brands.

Comment by John

The brand name is Below the Belt, and so is the “punchline”.

While a talking dick in my face may not be my personal flavor of humor there’s no reason to condemn this as garbage, if it successfully does what it is intended to – go after post-pubertal douche bags.

Whether that strategy is the best or not is a different q.

Comment by PeteG

That’s a fair point, but I saw this days ago and I didn’t recall the brand name.

Comment by John

Couldn’t you use that rationale for most things?

As long as the benefit is articulated, whatever you do is OK.

I’m not saying you’re wrong, but all of this was done to just get to a talking dick. The other stuff – which is utter garbage – is simply there to pad out the story till they get to the climax, excuse the pun.

Of course it will get a load of talk because that was entirely the goal but what’s interesting is the person behind the brand is apparently one of the founders of media specialists PHD. Given their whole premise is “intelligent media”, I wonder what their clients would think when one of the companies founders believes resorting to shock is the most effective way to drive awareness.

Comment by Rob

From a personal perspective I agree with you Rob.
There’s nothing sophisticated or entertaining about this ad.

Wondering if the creative strategy and execution represents a brand strategy of going after this psychographic, someone not interested in sophisticated humor. I don’t know. But the political outcomes of this past year has gotten me wary of labeling good and bad.

Either way, yes the protagonist is flat and uninteresting to me. And I don’t like looking at dicks for shock value. But I know 15-23 yo who might

Comment by PeteG

It’s fucked up…I’m arguing that an ad with a talking dick might not be bad. Thank you 2016.

Comment by PeteG

thats what this fucking blog does to people. fucks them up. now youll always be the guy who argued a talking dick was pretty fucking awesome. another reputation ruined by campbell.

Comment by andy@cynic

He’s ruined more lives than Pol Pot.

Comment by DH

more like pot noodle.

Comment by andy@cynic

Yupp ruined…only took one comment

Comment by PeteG

remember it only takes one sheep to be known as a sheep fucker.

Comment by andy@cynic

‘Post–pubertal douchbags’ – I wonder if this was the target audience description on the brief?

Comment by Ian Gee

I wish it was. Not just because it would be funny, it would at least make some sort of sense of the work.

I find target audience stuff really interesting in briefs. So many are written with the view of making the audience sound like smart, informed, worldly, top-of-socetiy habitants – regardless of whether you’re flogging a diamond or ball sack cleaner.

The thing is, creativity really comes alive when you are truly honest and authentic to the culture you want to understand, engage and banter with – and while clients sometimes find that hard to swallow, it doesn’t mean the work has to reflect their life … just reflect their version of aspiration.

In the case of this ad, it would appear a bunch of douchebags all want to end up a cross of a porn star and Gerard Butler.

Comment by Rob

Another post. He can’t stop himself. Unfortunately.

Comment by John

come on campbell, get started on fucking up this year before i start thinking 2017 might actually have some seeds of promise spouting.

Comment by andy@cynic

Dreams come true starting Monday.

Comment by Rob

Last weekend of sanity.

Comment by DH

Comments are closed.