The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

Even Nottingham Forest Are Embarrassed I Support Them …

So with COVID stopping football fans from attending games, my beloved Nottingham Forest thought of a fun way to help the players feel the stadium is full while earning some much-needed revenue at the same time.

The idea was simple.

Sumbit a photo of yourself and they’ll turn it into a life sized cardboard version of you to place on a seat.

Better yet, you can then come and collect it as a souvenir of your support.

Now I don’t need another life-sized cardboard cut out of me because years ago, I gave one to Jill as a wedding anniversary present to remind her who she was married to as I was travelling a lot.

It’s the pic at the top of this page. I know … and they say romance is dead!

However I did like the idea of supporting my team so I had a couple made.

Some of me.

Some of my mate who stupidly supports Derby County.

Anyway. over the weeks, Forest have been posting photos of the cardboard fans and I haven’t seen my face on any of them.

Oh I’ve seen my best mate Paul

… every bloody photo they put out, he’s there – upfront and centre.

But me?


At first I reassured myself it was because they hadn’t printed mine yet.

Then I thought maybe they had lost my order.

And then, finally, I found one of them …

Yep, right at the back, carefully hidden behind other cardboard cutouts.

What makes it worse is that Nottingham Forest is not a glamorous club.

Even when we won the European Cup twice in a row, we were never sexy …

Which is my way of saying that for a club who attracts an unfair share of the visually unappealing, they have deemed me the most visually unappealing of them all.

Thanks Forest, thanks a lot.

Now please just get in the bloody playoffs … it’s the least you can do for me now.

23 Comments so far
Leave a comment

I don’t know if they will even give you the playoffs Robert. Didn’t they let a last minute goal in with their fiercest rivals and lose last night?

Comment by George

Do you need some ointment for that burn George has just given you Rob?

Comment by Pete

No. But I need a stick to smash him in the face with.

Comment by Rob

showing your nottingham dna campbell.

Comment by andy@cynic

Wearing a “I regret nothing” standing next to a life sized cardboard cutout of yourself is strangely perfect.

Comment by George

Thank you. And it wasn’t even planned. A bit like those family photos we had in LA where every pic has the word ‘shit’ on it from the t-shirt I was wearing that said, ‘Holy shit, I love tacos’.

Comment by Rob

and yet you still come out of the shit covered in gold. its a fucking act of satan campbell. only excuse.

Comment by andy@cynic

Why are you surprised? Have you ever looked in the mirror?

Comment by Bazza

Thanks Baz. Your ‘be like Andy’ training is almost complete.

Comment by Rob

It’s amazing you convinced Jill to marry you in the first place. It’s even more impressive you convinced her to stay married to you after giving her a cardboard version of you as an anniversary present. That’s a severe case of Stockholm syndrome you’ve given her. Maybe that’s a marriage guidance therapist trick you should licence and sell.

Comment by Bazza

Saint Jill.

Comment by George

Beautiful Jill is a saint and an angel.


Comment by Jemma King

And a glutton for punishment.

Comment by Bazza

She is all that. But I didn’t realise it would all be so much at my expense.

Comment by Rob

So forest do have some tactics.

Comment by Pete

Jesus. Not you taking the piss too.

Comment by Rob

Well done Pete.

Comment by Bazza

I thought they’d cancelled the season in the lower leagues.

Comment by john

how much did you pay for that shit campbell? you could buy the whole fucking club for less.

Comment by andy@cynic

Apparently the cardboard fans improved the atmosphere.

Comment by DH

At least your not a Leeds fan, waiting for the implosion again.They always cease to amaze me

Comment by Northern

so you still fucking exist. where the fuck have you been? why the fuck should you get out of being mindfucked by campbell every day. come back and suffer like the rest of us pricks.

Comment by andy@cynic

Always winning friends and influencing people, Andrew.

Comment by George

Leave a Reply