The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

We Are Always On Display …

Thanks to technology, our private lives are less private.

While many of us seem to be OK with this, there is a potential price to pay.

With more and more companies worrying about their professional reputation, they are actively delving into the lives of their existing – and potential – employees … making sure the way they conduct themselves out of work reflects the values of how they should be acting when they are inside work.

While we can talk about whether a company has any right to demand how an individual behaves is open to debate, but what is certain is our personal and professional reputation is now constantly being viewed and reviewed by those around us and if you want any chance of continually moving forward in life, you have to be conscious of what reaction your actions may have on that.

Let me tell you a story …

A few weeks ago, I was staying in a hotel in Germany.

It was a fancy-pants hotel, with the room overlooking a central garden.

Imagine my surprise when I looked out the window and saw this …

Yes, that’s a man.

A man who is walking around his room.

A man who is walking around his room, naked.

A man who is walking around his room naked with the curtains open.

He was like this for bloody ages and yet, when he saw me trying to take a photograph of him, he acted shocked [not shocked enough to put on his clothes though] when he was the one who knowingly poncing around his hotel room with his unimpressive penis on display.

Look, I get when you have travelled a long way, you just want to get into your hotel room and let your metaphorical hair down … but making everyone complicit in your actions is a bit mean.

Maybe I should give lessons on hotel etiquette …

You might be wondering what gives me the right to do that, well let me tell you why.

About a year ago, after an extraordinarily long day, I finally got to my hotel room and just wanted to relax.

Problem was, a very dear friend of mine was leaving Wieden and I had to send in my leaving ‘video’ that night.

Did I send my message while standing naked in front of a window?

No …

As you can see from the photo below, I found a way to balance the need to chillax after a long day of work with a sense of professional decorum towards my friend and fellow hotel guests.

I have created a 5 step ‘reputation training program’ to help any individual or hotel group who is interested in knowing how to best handle these situations in ways that balances self expression with managing a strong corporate image.

All at very reasonable prices.

You’re welcome.

23 Comments so far
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You are very, very strange and I don’t know if I will ever be able to get that photo of you out of my mind. It’s criminally wrong.

Comment by Bazza

Austin Powers has a lot to be blamed for.

Comment by George

My ice bucket was bigger than his pineapple.

Comment by Rob

Getting a relatively large item to imply you are in possession of a large member isn’t fooling anyone. Especially when you have written so many posts about the scale of your best friends penis.

Comment by Bazza

i used to think the posts about his best mates cock were the worst it could get. i was fucking wrong.

Comment by andy@cynic

You know someone photographing someone in their hotel room is worse than someone walking around their hotel room naked with the curtains open.

Comment by Bazza

I can see Robert’s face looking gleeful as he saw the hotel guest making a fool of themselves in an open window. It must have been the perfect camera bait for him.

Comment by Pete

You’re right Pete, I was excited when I saw him … you know how I get when I spot possible public humiliation.

Now Baz … I must admit you’re not the first to say I’m the perv, but when I’m just photographing the person who is walking around their hotel room naked with the windows wide open, knowingly looking onto a communal hotel garden, I fail to see how I can be worse than them.

Oh I get I’m an absolute asshole, just not as much of an absolute asshole as them.

Comment by Rob

You keep telling yourself that Rob,

Comment by Bazza

smack the fucker down baz. if you can get a stepladder to be the same height as his smug ugly fucking face.

Comment by andy@cynic

I suppose someone who does all they can to tarnish their professional reputation while still having an enviable one is best placed to write about reputation management. What a twisted world we live in.

Comment by George

Poacher turned keeper who still acts like a poacher.

Comment by Bazza

Oh come on, I don’t do ALL I can to tarnish my reputation. There’s a whole lot more I could do … but I don’t, BECAUSE I’M VERY MATURE. Ahem.

Comment by Rob

There are many things you can talk about and teach others, etiquette is not one of them. Neither is what constitutes an appropriate photograph to send to your colleague. No wonder they were leaving.

Comment by Pete

Thank goodness Nottingham Forest won last night. I dread to think the content of today’s post had they lost. That said, there is an important point about professional reputation hidden in this post. But you have hidden it very well.

Comment by Lee Hill

They did … and it was magnificent.

I’ve chosen to ignore the rest of your comment, ha.

Comment by Rob

The worrying thought is that there just has to be a vast array of inappropriate behaviour that you don’t reveal.

Comment by John

To be sure, this is a very disturbing revelation and in light of legal advice we shall not be renewing your invitation to speak.

Comment by DMX Dublin.

To be sure, to be sure, this is a worrying revelation and our legal department has advised us not to re-invite you.

Comment by DMX Dublin

the only reason i think this could be the real conference organizers is that the stupid pricks actually invited campbell to speak.

Comment by andy@cynic

fuck me campbell, youre an animal.

it should make me laugh but it scares the fucking crap out of me. how you havent been taken down by someone (mafia metoo, police, cia) is one of lifes biggest fucking mysteries. and as unfair as fucking fuck.

Comment by andy@cynic

I’ve just thrown up in my mouth.

Comment by DH

Is that a hotpot between your legs or are you just pleased to see yourself?

Comment by Womankind.

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