The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

Yesterday I received a package from a headhunter I’d never heard of based in Japan.

Inside was a copy of Matt Beaumont’s hysterical advertising book ‘e‘ … a covering letter explaining that if any of the ‘comings and goings’ in the book resonated with me, they’d happily find me a new job … and ‘advance’ approval to wrap up the book and give it to someone else if I’d already read it.

All very nice, except …

1 The book is so old I’m sure everyone in adland has already read it.

2 It doesn’t matter if you work at WK or JWT … there’ll be something in the book that resonates with you.

3 Inside the front cover they’ve put a huge stamp of their company logo – so if I was to pass it on to someone else, they’d know I was a bloody cheapskate!

Plus the whole point of advertising is that you get to work alongside the weird and the wonderful – because despite it becoming more and more corporate, every now and then you still get the odd moment of ‘gold’ like the email I got from a German planner thanking me for some advice I’d given them on their upcoming Lufthansa pitch.

Thank you for you kindness Robert. With your help we now are ready for take off and will surely win the glorious Lufthansa account. Wishes of the best to you.

Yes I know it sounds awfully like Pertie van Helden [a character in the book ‘e’] but I swear that is exactly how I got it!  Genius!

Sure you probably get this sort of thing happening in many industries but it’s certainly one of the things that keeps me getting up in the morning … well, that and the cash … so while I thank the nice people at the Japanese Recruitment Company for the book, I have to say they won’t be hearing from me.

At least not yet 🙂

If they really wanted to send a pressie that was original, funny and had the potential to motivate a ‘frustrated individual‘ to seek out their help … then they should have sent the brilliant ‘money box‘ that the delightful Emah just gave me for Christmas,

How great is that eh?

I’m just trying to work out whether she is implying I’m not happy or she’s isn’t! Ha!

As many of you know, I have a cat … a cat that has been hell-bent on destruction since we got her about a month ago.

One of her first ‘actions’ was to fuck up my Xbox 360 – however in one of the biggest shocks of the year, Microsoft have not only leapt to the rescue, but they’ve done it in a way that actually changes my attitude towards them. Abit.

Despite it being out of warranty, they’ve not only changed the console without any fuss – but they’ve given me an additional years guarantee as well as a months free [Gold] membership to Xbox Live.

Now that’s service … and it’s way, way, way better than what you get with Apple.

Talk about mindfucking!

I’ve said it many times before, but how a company treats a customer when things goes wrong is the single biggest opportunity to keep them as a customer in the future – and whilst many organisations just don’t ‘get it’, it would seem Bill Gates mob has not only understood, but put it into practice.

Thanks Microsoft … you’ve done good and not only is my Cat going to live another day, but my Christmas is not going to one of total boredom either:)

Lots of people slag off the ad industry, saying anyone can do what we can do … and whilst I’ve fought passionately against this attitude for years and years, my friends at GPY&R [better known as my VB buddies] have gone and pulled the rug from under me by proving the public are right … anyone CAN do it … including a fucking monkey!

Thanks guys … maybe if we’d got ‘him’ to do the VB campaign, we’d of kept the biz, ha!

As NOT created by that bastard, AdMonkey!

Following on from my post about how great packaging design can motivate consumer action, I thought I’d highlight a great example that’s just come out in Asia …

How good is that eh? 

I particularly love the ‘hook’ they’ve placed at the top of the bottle so you can make it into a real glitter ball … or should I say glitter bottle!

This is brilliant stuff – so brilliant that it convinced a guy who hasn’t drunk any alcohol for over 20 years to buy the bloody thing – which is surely the ultimate demonstration of how powerful great packaging can be.

Well done Absolut … you might not of converted me to start drinking your vodka [the bottle in currently residing in my freezer] but you have converted me into being a fan and that’s better than most brands ever achieve.

I have just received this very nice email from settimo@psychedelic-drama.com

Make your dick sick and dangerous!   

Upgrade it with these magical  pills. http://www.yesipharm.com/

Apart from the fact that offering to make my dick ‘sick’ is not exactly the most motivating sales proposition … I’m also not that keen on having my nether regions classed as a dangerous weapon because knowing my luck George W will probably launch an immediate attack and I’ll end up bent over in pain with my eyes watering.

So to Settimo, I thank you for your very kind offer but if I may be so bold, I suggest you work on your sales pitch because at the moment, it’s not that convincing.

Thank you and I wish you a lovely Christmas.

[Another example of what happens when your business partner opens Pandora’s Porn box with his email address]