The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

Meetings Of Death …


They seem to be happening more and more.

Meetings for meetings.
Meetings to discuss meetings.
Meetings to plan if there is a meeting.

And what is amazing is that anyone can call one of these.


And given most companies place a limit on the amount an employee can spend without prior approval – I find it hilarious anyone can commandeer thousands of dollars/pounds of employee time on a whim.

What makes it even more laughable is often these meetings are no more than a simple question that could have been handled by just going up to a colleagues desk.

But it’s not entirely the fault of the person who calls meetings …

We now live in times where looking busy is a key requisite – more than even being productive – and nothing makes you look busy than calling and attending a meeting.

Of at least an hour, of which 47 minutes is made up of waiting for everyone to turn up, small talk and then going off on tangents at least 7 times.

What I find funny is companies continue to say they want to help employees with their work life balance …

They talk about reducing emails while pushing things like slack … that are far more demanding for immediacy of response.

They talk about wanting everyone to take their holidays … and then dictate when they can/can’t be taken.

Ans they talk about wanting to aid productivity then allow so many meetings to happen that you end up starting your real work towards the end of the day.

With that in mind, here are the 4 questions to ask when you are asked to attend a meeting that you are not sure should be a meeting. Or at least a meeting you’re not sure you should be attending.

1. What is this meeting trying to change?
2. Will the people who can make decisions be there?
3. Will they have all the information they need to make a decision there and then?
4. Why do you think I am one of these people?

Yes it’s a pain.

Yes, they will think you’re a pain.

But I guarantee you, it won’t be as painful as another day of sitting in a vast majority of inane meetings that are designed to make the organiser feel important – or able to share the blame of the situation they are in/caused – while also ensuring you end up having to work late.


You’re welcome.

14 Comments so far
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The time I would have saved if I knew this years ago.

Comment by George

That’s definitely a dig at me isn’t it. Hahaha.

Comment by Rob

why do you think that mr fucking “lets just talk it out”?

Comment by andy@cynic

5) Will Rob be there?

Comment by John

Most important point.

Comment by DH

I remember you once telling me “go to the fucking meeting” when I dared ask why I had to go.

Comment by DH

You did have your moments David.

Comment by George

That’s not because I was a dick, it was because it was your client.

Comment by Rob

Answer for everything.

Comment by DH

fucking wrong answer for everything except when he calls you out for being a lazy prick.

Comment by andy@cynic

The tyranny of looking busy.

Comment by Lee Hill

Oh yes … 100%

The focus on looking busy over being productive is incredible.

Comment by Rob

Where you were always good at procrastinating then distracting everyone around you to enable you to procrastinate..

Comment by DH

meetings of fucking mediocrity called for by participants of mediocrity.
cause shit by doing fuck all then fuck off and claim everything. wankers.

Comment by andy@cynic

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