The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

You’ve had an OK weekend. Nothing brilliant, but not too crap either.

Maybe you watched the latest season of Britain/America/Australia Got Talent.

It was underwhelming wasn’t it?

The magicians were all crap for a start.

Contrived drama with little wow. Pathetic.

So maybe you decided to change the sheets on your bed.

It was a great idea until you have to change the cover on the duvet.

OH MY GOD … what a nightmare.

Struggle, frustration, sweat and swear words.

It felt like you’d just endured a wrestling match with an octopus and three marathon didn’t it?!

Well, don’t say this blog never gives you something useful, because what I’m about to do is change your life.

OK, my wife is.

[And I don’t mean in the Jillyism sense of the word]

And when I say ‘change your life’, I mean it in the sense of how you change your duvet cover.

I know, that doesn’t sound very exciting does it.

And when I tell you it won’t require any physical exertion, nor any ‘sticking-your-head-in-the-duvet-cover-to-try-and-get-the-corners-right’ and you can do it all in a matter of minutes … you start changing your mind don’t you?

Yes you do.

But there’s more.

Because I’m [read: Jill] going to show you a way to do it that will make you feel like you’re better than all the Magicians on Britain/America/Australia Got Talent put together EVERY SINGLE TIME YOU DO IT.

It is a technique that will get invited to parties.

You will get dates.

Probably promotions.

And I do this all for you. God I’m kind.

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls … feast your eyes on bedlinen sorcery of the best kind.