Filed under: Attitude & Aptitude, Crap Marketing Ideas From History!, Taboo Categories
A long time ago I wrote about a gum that was designed to stop teenagers whacking off.
Then there was the soap that supposedly made you a virgin again. Or something.
However before you think the ‘anti-sex’ brigade have the monopoly on stupid and ineffective products … don’t forget Vulva aftershave, the scent designed to make men smell like a vagina. A sweaty vagina. Oh how I wish I was joking.
Anyway, I say all this because recently a friend sent me this …
I am hoping he sent it to me because he knew I’d find it amusing, but seriously look at it!
I must admit, when I first saw it, I thought it was a joke but then I visited the URL and it went to a real place.
Now I have to be honest, having read it – I literally don’t know if it’s true or a parody.
If it’s true, it’s hilarious. [And a teensy bit scary]
And if it’s a parody, it’s absolutely brilliant. [Check out the ‘Family Fun’ link]
But here’s the thing, that ‘ad’ states that you can never climb the ladder to heaven if your hands are full of penis.
Despite my best friend being the proud owner of a penis that could easily be mistaken for an international ballistic missile, I’ve never had any penis size issues but I might now if this organisation say’s that the average penis requires 2 hands to control.
Or maybe that’s just people who are going to go to hell.
Which – if it is – is the best ad for sin I’ve ever seen.
Besides, there’ll be more interesting people there … not to mention all my friends.
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PS: I promise the blog posts get better this week. Eventually.
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Get better later in the week? What do you mean, this is your best post ever.
Comment by Billy Whizz October 25, 2016 @ 6:19 amSo good I’m not embarrassed to be first.
Comment by Billy Whizz October 25, 2016 @ 6:19 amhad to get his mates donkey cock into it though didnt he.
Comment by andy@cynic October 25, 2016 @ 6:37 amTo be fair to me, it’s the only person who could feasibly have both his hands full of penis while climbing up a ladder.
Comment by Rob October 25, 2016 @ 8:16 amMaybe your friend sent it to you because of this.
Comment by Pete October 25, 2016 @ 6:24 amhttps://instagram.com/p/BL8Aw27jniq/
old habits never fucking die do they campbell.
Comment by andy@cynic October 25, 2016 @ 6:33 amand why the fuck are you in a shirt. a shit shirt but still a shirt.
Comment by andy@cynic October 25, 2016 @ 6:35 am#Stalker
Comment by Rob October 25, 2016 @ 8:16 amThis cannot be real. Have you seen the mastuhaters section?
Comment by Pete October 25, 2016 @ 6:27 amwho cares, its better than the usual shit campbell spouts on here.
Comment by andy@cynic October 25, 2016 @ 6:38 amI honestly don’t know if it’s real or not, it shouldn’t be and some parts of it make me feel it isn’t … but then it exists and who would bother to keep it up that long otherwise?
Comment by Rob October 25, 2016 @ 8:17 amYou’ve kept this blog going for 10+ years.
Comment by DH October 25, 2016 @ 8:41 amCrickey.
Comment by George October 25, 2016 @ 6:48 amDare I say it Robert, but this appears the sort of website you used to create. I still remember your spoof research company site. What was the name of them again?
Comment by Lee Hill October 25, 2016 @ 7:01 amHahahaha … you mean this: http://asianyang.wordpress.com
We even got mentioned in the UK Daily Telegraph once.
Comment by Rob October 25, 2016 @ 8:18 amThis blog is back on brand.
Comment by Bazza October 25, 2016 @ 7:53 amAs are the comments ….
Comment by Rob October 25, 2016 @ 8:19 amThis is hilarious and very disturbing.
Comment by Mary Bryant October 25, 2016 @ 9:08 am