Filed under: Crap Campaigns In History, Crap Marketing Ideas From History!, Crap Products In History
First it was the man your man could smell like.
That was good. Funny. Interesting.
Then we had that pretentious Gerard “You can see it in my deeds” Butler bollocks.
Which was not good. But funny. In a fucked-up kind-of way.
Then things took a very freaky turn with the ancient, ex-guitarist of Judas Priest deciding to become a fragrance mogul by launching ‘Metal’ … the first scent designed exclusively for lovers of Rock Music.
No seriously, I’m not making this up.
But now … just when you thought it couldn’t get any more twisted, you have this:
Yes … you can now buy a fragrance that features a b-grade, fake, royal insignia because the creator is a delusional fuckwit, that lets you smell – and feel – like this:
And you thought it was mad when Mont Blanc invited you to smell like a pen.
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Reblogged this on The Rant.
Comment by bittergirlhabsfan July 15, 2015 @ 6:26 amEmpire by Trump. Smell like a wig wearing, racist, wanker.
Comment by DH July 15, 2015 @ 6:30 amExcellent positioning.
Comment by Rob July 15, 2015 @ 8:16 amEmpire by trump. Smell like the gutter at 3am.
Comment by Billy Whizz July 15, 2015 @ 6:39 amwho the fuck would want to smell like trump except some 18 year old airhead from la who thinks it will increase her chances of being a fucking miss world pageant girl.
empire by trump. smell exactly like trump.
Comment by andy@cynic July 15, 2015 @ 6:48 amin england it would translate as smell like a fart. thats fucking perfect.
Comment by andy@cynic July 15, 2015 @ 6:48 amWhich is basically saying “smell like shit.”
Comment by DH July 15, 2015 @ 7:19 amHe would only be more offended by your character assassination if you were a Mexican immigrant.
Comment by Rob July 15, 2015 @ 8:17 amThe epitome of ego is thinking people would like to smell like you.
Comment by George July 15, 2015 @ 6:58 amThe epitome of tragic is knowing there will be some people who do.
Don’t worry George, you’re safe on both counts.
Comment by Rob July 15, 2015 @ 8:17 amThe sad thing is, a wig would not wave hello and goodbye in the wind. The man would be better off bald, and so would we.
And yeah, who would want to smell like Trump? Thats like a fragrance so you can smell like George Bush or my Uncle Fred. Who would want to smell like an old guy with bad hair and heading for fat?
I never quite understood the point or appeal of men’s fragrances, anyway. Soap, maybe. Toothpaste, okay. But not something that makes your eyes water when he wafts in the door…
Comment by judyt54 July 15, 2015 @ 7:06 amYou’re mistaking his asinine personality with his toxic fragrance.
Comment by DH July 15, 2015 @ 7:20 amyou mean there’s a discernible difference, right
Comment by judyt54 July 15, 2015 @ 7:25 amOne gets weaker after 12 hours, the other doesn’t.
Comment by DH July 15, 2015 @ 7:28 amI’ve heard it’s stronger than Jaegermeister.
Comment by Bazza July 15, 2015 @ 7:35 amHis breath?
Comment by Rob July 15, 2015 @ 8:17 amhis cock cheese. yes i fucking went there. deal with it.
Comment by andy@cynic July 15, 2015 @ 8:22 amI think I am going to be sick. Thank you for that Andrew.
Comment by George July 15, 2015 @ 8:32 amthats what his ex wives said.
Comment by andy@cynic July 15, 2015 @ 8:36 amAndy FTW.
Comment by DH July 15, 2015 @ 8:51 amWhat’s with the “structured modern man” bit? Like how Trump emerged from bankruptcy restructuring?
Comment by Bryan July 15, 2015 @ 10:24 amstructured
(ˈstrʌktʃəd)
adj
1. having a distinct physical shape or form, often provided by an internal structure
2. planned in broad outline; organized: structured play for preschoolers.
3. having a definite predetermined pattern; rigid: structured hierarchy.
basically, organized, controlled, with an endoskeleton so he doesnt fall over when he walks.
Makes him sound about as charming as a high rise building.
Comment by judyt54 July 15, 2015 @ 12:36 pmSo it’s a Trump high rise … Can I spend a small fortune on a timeshare for the cologne but when I actually go to use it I find that they never actually put together the bottle?
Comment by Bryan July 16, 2015 @ 7:19 pm