The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

It’s My Birthday But You’re Getting The Presents …
June 12, 2012, 6:15 am
Filed under: Comment

Yes, I really did use that overused – and let’s face it, crap – sales promotion statement for the headline of this post because:

1. It IS my birthday.

2. I am off on holiday for 2 weeks.

… so you don’t have to put up with ‘blog posts’ till I’m back – the ultimate present or what!

Today I am 42.

That’s 8 years off 50.


So it’s weird that I still feel – and probably act – like I’m 28, but then …

I have a desk that looks like this. Or worse, this.

I still go out and buy mentalness like this.

I still go to concerts like this.

I wear offensiveness like this. And this.

I still want to buy pointless rubbish like this.

I do occasionally start acting like this.

I still get stupidly excited I’m going to spend time with people like like this … and these.

So all in all, it’s OK getting older – because whereas I once used to think it meant wearing ‘slacks’, talking about ‘the garden’, talking about wine and wearing ‘sensible shoes’ … it means none of those things, it just means you have the confidence to not really give a fuck about what others think of you and you can spend your time and focus on what interests, intrigues, excites and fulfills you which is why I’m glad it’s my birthday today, even if I’m not going to get the sort of presents that used to make 12th June, truly stellar!

Have fun during the period of blog bollocks freedom, because like Arnie, I’ll be back.

Bad luck.


PS: Special birthday hugs and kisses to the wife & Paul – whose birthdays are on June 15th and 16th respectively. I’m so glad I’ll be able to spend it with you, even if that’s possibly the worst present you could think of getting from me.

43 Comments so far
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i already fucking said happy birthday to you in yesterdays fucking post so ill be fucked if im going to do it again.

Comment by andy@cynic

unless you pay me.

Comment by andy@cynic

all those examples of what you buy and what you do say the fucking following about you.

1) you have more money than is fucking fair.
2) you have no fashion, music or gadget taste.
3) you need a kicking. its your birthday so it can wait till tomorrow.

Comment by andy@cynic

Superhero model and Van Halen concerts. That’s worthy of prison sentences alone. Then there’s the queen tees and the birkenstocks.

Comment by DH

Happy birthday Rob.

A big birthday hug and kiss from me.

Jemma x

Comment by Jemma King

if youve bought him a present were going to fall the fuck out.

you dont write, call, email, bitch, complain, whine. youre much better now we dont work tofuckingether. still fucking miss you though jem. not as much as billy but i know i mean more to you and so i fucking should.

Comment by andy@cynic

Stop trying to make me jealous Jemma. It’s working.

Comment by Billy Whizz

and another fucking holiday? really?

Comment by andy@cynic

Happy birthday from all the girls in the Bryant house.

Visit soon.

Comment by Mary Bryant

On holiday? Lock up your guest rooms.
Happy birthday Rob. Hope you get the weird shit that makes you happy.

Comment by DH

never a fucking truer word spoken.

off to vanfuckingcouver. so fucking boring even campbell cant take it and thats some fucker that likes listening to radio fucking shit shit.

Comment by andy@cynic

42 going on 21 or 90 depending on what day it is. That is not a criticism, it’s what makes you, you. A gemini. Happy birthday Rob. Enjoy your day and your holiday.

Comment by Bazza

so youre calling him a schitzo. fair fucking call.

Comment by andy@cynic

My family have got here before me. That is alarming. Happy birthday Robert, enjoy the break and try not to annoy Jill too much.

Comment by George


Comment by andy@cynic

Happy birthday Rob! Hope it’s a good one.

Enjoy your holiday too…and think about it, if you keep taking so many of them, you may not be able to enjoy it as much anymore.

Comment by Rafik

He’s done a good job with coping so far.

Comment by DH

Happy birthday Robert. See you on board.

Comment by Lee Hill

You’re joking. Again? How does he do it?

Comment by Billy Whizz

those blackmail photos campbell has of you are still doing the fucking trick then lee.

Comment by andy@cynic

Best wishes to you Robert.

Comment by Katerina

k. what the fuck are you doing here?

Comment by andy@cynic

Don’t know why everyone’s wishing you a happy birthday because it looks to me every day is your birthday and it’s very fucking happy.

Comment by Billy Whizz

dont mistake all this for people liking you, were just happy youre leaving us the fuck alone for a couple of weeks.

Comment by andy@cynic

Thank you for all the nice wishes. Even if I basically blackmailed you into writing something, it’s still nice.

See you soon. Some of you, very soon.

Cue: Evil laugh.

Comment by Rob

Happy Birthday, Rob.

Comment by Ciaran McCabe

Happy birthday Ringo, John and Paul, I mean ..Rob, Jill and Paul..

Comment by niko

Happy birthday Robert.

Comment by Jonathan Rosenberg

Happy Birthday Rob, have a great time

Comment by Bhaskar

Hello Rob,
Very best birthday wishes.
Naoko xx

Comment by Naoko

Happy birthday Rob! Have a super one. Next time I’m going to blog about my birthday too. No one ever remembers mine. LOL (kidding!!!).

Comment by Anjali Ramachandran (@anjali28)

Does this mean you’ll be in the UK on the 21st?
If so Manchester is calling… Sup North style.

Happy Birthday too!

Comment by Rob Mortimer (Not a fake Andy)

Sadly I don’t think so. It will happen one day. I hope.

Comment by Rob

We should hold one in Nottingham just to get you there…!

Comment by Rob Mortimer (Not a fake Andy)

Rob, happy birthday. Live long and happily. kisses.

Comment by toto

so did you have a fucking good one or what?

Comment by andy@cynic

Hope its been a great one, mate!

Comment by Age

Happy Birthday Rob! Hope you’ve had an amazing day.

Comment by Gail Barker

where are you campbell. i dont fucking care as long as its nowhere near fucking me.

Comment by andy@cynic

im bored. when the fuck are you back?

youre going to make me fucking regret typing that shit arent you. prick.

Comment by andy@cynic

As I live and breathe, I never thought I would read those words.
That baby has changed you.
(I on the other hand am always bored)

Comment by northern

cant any fucker have a moment of suicidal contemplation without having the bastard thrown back in their face. fucking harsh northern. fucking harsh but slightly fucking fair.

Comment by andy@cynic

Does normal blog service resume on monday because if it does, I’m going to be ill that day.

Comment by DH

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