The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

If you are one of those lucky enough to be blessed with my details [which is approx 99.57% of the population because I give it out more freely than an 18 year old crack addict with self worth issues], then drop me a line and I’ll give you my new info.

Saying that, if you’re too lazy or too technically inept to ‘update’, then you’ll be happy to know all my other numbers still work but don’t blame me if I take bloody ages to get back to you. [Are you hearing Mark Sheldon?? Ha! ]

I was born to an English Father and an Italian Mother.

My wife is half Australian and half Canadian.

I have been lucky enough to live in many countries and can legally call four of them ‘home’.

And yet at this moment, I – along with my wife and cat – are flying high in the sky, away from our life in Singapore and onto a new adventure in Hong Kong.

It’s a strange feeling being somewhere and yet nowhere.

In Singapore I knew how to get around … I had friends, I knew places, I understood the cultural quirks … and yet in HK, despite being there many times, I know I am a stranger – someone who still has to forge a place in that land.

I wonder how long it will take for me to truly call it home?

Sometimes it’s about the time it takes to make friends … other times it’s linked to ownership … you never know what it will take or how long you will need.

Believe it or not I’m not complaining … it’s just part of life … and the fact is, as long as I have my family with me, everything will be OK,

Well the reason I am writing this is because I’ve just been a taxi and heard the ancient Dr Hook song, ‘When You’re In Love With A Beautiful Woman’.

I never liked it … or them … but hearing it again after god knows how many decades, I realised how their happy little tune contains some of the most bitter song lyrics I’ve heard since I had the misfortune of hearing The Smiths.

If you don’t know the song, click here … but for those who can hum the middle-of-the-road ditty in their sleep, here are the lyrics …

When you’re in love with a beautiful woman … it’s hard
When you’re in love with a beautiful woman … you know it’s hard

Everybody tempts her, everybody tells her
She’s the most beautiful woman they know

It’s like singing a Slayer ‘song’ to the tune of Happy Birthday …

Saying that, I think it’s time to write a sequel … maybe something like ‘When You’re In Love With A Beautiful Woman [It’s Hard … Unless You’re Loaded!]’

The thing is, I think everyone can sort of relate to the story of this song … let’s face it, when an ‘ugly’ goes out with a hottie, you don’t think it’ll last because you know everyone looks at you thinking “it’ll never last” [which is why Cate Blanchet’s husband and I live in daily fear of our other halves coming to their senses] … so why do so many people go out of their way to associate with brands that they know in their heart, don’t really suit them?

Of course there are many answers – but one of them is that these people [of which I am one] like to convince themselves they are one of the ‘exceptions’ when to everyone else, they’re just one of the delusional masses, ha!

Anyway I better go because I leave on a jet plane in 3 days and still have 50,000 boxes of crap I need to sort through. Eek!

You will remember they have banned all holiday time till June 2009 and mandated all staff to stay at their desks till 8:30pm EVEN IF THEY HAVE NO WORK TO DO … however I’ve just heard they’ve implemented another of their fuckwit rules – and this time it’s one that even Scrooge would feel is a bit harsh.

Apparently, any member of staff who does not use up their vacation time will only get 50% of its value paid back to them by the company.

Apart from the fact it’s the company who is stopping people from taking their legally entitled holiday, in essence, they’ve just given all their staff a [potential] pay cut.

I am sure this is illegal but given Singapore is the ‘friend of the corporate’, I’m sure they think they can get away with it … besides, they know people are so worried about the economy, they’ll not risk doing anything that might jeopardize their employment.

Well I think this bullying should be stopped … so if anyone in that agency is fed up of how they’re being treated, get in touch because I’ve got one of my clients to agree to give you access to one of their top notch corporate lawyers for free … so if you’re prepared to take a stand [and are able to prove your situation] let’s see if we can strike a blow for common decency.

Read this and weep/cringe/spew/laugh …

It should be an April Fool’s joke, but instead it’s just another example of a brand that has become a joke.