The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

When Fashion Makes You Look Like Something You Fold And Hold Fashion In …
April 14, 2016, 6:20 am
Filed under: Brand Suicide, Crap Campaigns In History, Fashion, Unfashion

I’m going to go straight into the post like I’ve not just been away on a family and work trip that was bloody wonderful. Ahem.

So last week I talked about the advertising for Gucci and their quest to make the 80’s TV gameshow host look, the next big thing.

Well I’ve seen another part of their campaign and it’s getting weirder.

Yes, it’s the same gameshow host model – with the same hair and glasses – but now they’re showing her like she’s on her way home after a busy week of filming. Or something.

But this time it’s even worse.


What’s worse, this suitcase/dress combo [which is a phrase I never thought I would ever write in my life] looks like awfully like a Sheriff’s outfit from a 1970’s Spaghetti Western.


I appreciate the fashion industry is in a predicament.

To remain relevant it has to appear it is constantly progressing and the only way to do that – after things like fabric innovation – is to create even greater division between what has gone on before … but this is ridiculous.

Yes … yes … I know I am about as fashionable as a pair of Crocs [I was going to say Birkenstocks, but even they were the darling of the fashion industry not that long ago] but seriously, what the fuck is going on?

Apart from trying to make an era renowned for its naffness, look fashionable … why the hell would anyone want to look like their suitcase?

Even secret agents wouldn’t want to look like their suitcase.

Even suitcases wouldn’t want to look like a suitcase.

If I see someone walking down the street dressed like this – which in Shanghai, is a distinct possibility – I commit to you right now, that I will stare, point and then shout, “your dress makes you look like a boxy suitcase”.

And yes, I know that is not the best insult, so I’m open to suggestions.

But for god’s sake Gucci sort yourself out. You might not realise it right now but you’re about 2 degrees from resembling a fancy dress shop. A fancy dress shop in Luton.

23 Comments so far
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But if the suitcase had wifi you’d snap both of them up.

Comment by Bazza


Comment by Rob

I don’t know why you’re taking the piss, it doesn’t look that different from any of your million military shirts.

Comment by DH

Well she certainly would be well camouflaged in a forest during autumn.

Comment by Rob

If I squint and imagine you with hair, I think you are a dead ringer for the woman in the ad.

Comment by DH

a dead ringer for the fucking suitcase more like.

Comment by andy@cynic

The only modeling Rob is suitable for is losers weekly.

Comment by Billy Whizz

It doesn’t matter what people think you look like, you know you’re wearing Gucci. Or something.

Comment by john

Yes … and you know you paid a bloody fortune to look like a suitcase. And not a good suitcase, but one of those cheap ‘Polo from Beverly Hills’ versions that are available at airport shops and whose only brush with ‘toff sports’ in America is eating a packet of Polo mints in McDonalds.

Comment by Rob

what the fuck do you care, you have underlings to take your bags as you flit from fucking lounge to free business class luxury you big blagging shit.

Comment by andy@cynic

whens your next fucking holiday then campbell, monday?

Comment by andy@cynic

2/1 it’s tomorrow.

Comment by DH

Sadly it isn’t. I must be slipping.

Comment by Rob

Welcome back Robert. I was in Dallas last week and saw a few people wearing outfits like that. Except instead of the suitcase, they paired it with a cowboy hat. America is scary like that.

Comment by George

The outfit reminds me of the 1975 photo of David Bowie – It might be the same fabric, for goodness sake. Look it up!
David Bowie Steve Schapiro image

Comment by cherylcamardo

Hello Cheryl, thank you for popping by. You’re right it is … which begs the question whether Gucci want to go retro or are just mental.

Comment by Rob

I suppose even the mental have a reason. 😉

Comment by cherylcamardo

is it a fucking coincidence her hair colour matches the same fucking brown as her clothes and bag. its colour coordination gone fucking mad.

Comment by andy@cynic

There’s a brand new talk,
but it’s not very clear
That people from good homes
are talking this year
It’s loud and tasteless
and I’ve heard it before
You shout it while you’re dancing
on the whole dance floor
Oh bop, fashion

Comment by john

for a moment i thought you were quoting that hanson mmmbop shit then i realised it was bowie and now im even more fucking depressed.

Comment by andy@cynic

Another legacy destroyed.

Comment by DH

Hey, hey – they say I better get a chaperone
Because I can’t stop messin’ with the danger zone
No, I won’t worry, and I won’t fret
Ain’t no law against it yet
Oop – she bop – she bop

Comment by john

[…] Then it became 1970’s cowgirl with matching suitcase. […]

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