Filed under: Comment, Crap Marketing Ideas From History!, Crap Products In History
A while back – when Australia was going through it’s 1000th mid-term MP change – I was reading the Sydney Morning Herald newspaper in an attempt to keep up with all the political shenanigans.
While reading the article, I saw an image that shocked me.
Not because of it’s gratuitous violence.
But because of it’s brilliance at totally underplaying the bravery of soldiers.
What am I talking about?
Well, if you’ve been paying attention, you’ll know from the title of this post …
That’s right, it’s a cuddly bear in an [old] soldiers uniform.
Not only that, it’s a cuddly bear in an [old] soldiers uniform that you can buy from the Sydney Morning Herald’s shop.
Who the hell are they targeting?
Is it for someone to buy their kid?
Is it for someone to buy for themselves?
Is it for someone to buy as a gift to someone else?
I have no idea, the only thing I do know is WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?
I get it if you want to help young children understand the sacrifices of their forefathers but this is the Sydney Morning Herald … a paper that prides itself on being an adult paper covering adult issues.
And if they really wanted to commemorate the brave soldiers who died in previous conflicts, surely they could have come up with something a bit more meaningful. Or even sensitive.
Don’t get me wrong, I like a cuddly bear as much as the next man, but as a commemorative object for the tens of thousands who died in a bloody and achingly long war, I don’t know if that’s really the best thing.
I’d love to know how many they’d sold.
Then I’d love to know the addresses of everyone who bought one, so I could go up to their house, knock on their door and ask …
“WHAT THE BLOODY HELL ARE YOU THINKING?!!!”
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“I like a cuddly bear as much as the next (40 year old) man.”
This sentence will haunt me for the rest of my life.
Comment by Bazza October 21, 2015 @ 6:21 amWho seems to think it’s the weekend.
Comment by John October 21, 2015 @ 6:24 amI don’t know what you’re talking about John. I’m assuming you’re saying that because for Rob, every day is the weekend.
Comment by DH October 21, 2015 @ 6:26 amI’m probably losing my mind after reading the post, but I’m sure it originally ended with a wish for his reader to have a good weekend.
Comment by John October 21, 2015 @ 6:30 amYou’re not losing your mind John, I wish you were, but yesterday I noticed I’d made ANOTHER mistake and thought I had changed the settings to I thought I had and then I read your comment and realised your eagle eyes and WordPress technology conspired not to make that happen … at least in a seamless fashion … which shows that I really should stop trying to do this ‘posting in the future’ thing because I’m just not very good at it.
Comment by Rob October 21, 2015 @ 8:21 amwordpress is fucking ballsy biting the fucking hand that feeds the bastards. well done wordpress.
Comment by andy@cynic October 21, 2015 @ 8:37 amHe meant cuddly bears with wifi built in.
Comment by DH October 21, 2015 @ 6:28 amthe fucking iphone 6s should be haunting you bazza. what a pile of fucking overhyped shit.
Comment by andy@cynic October 21, 2015 @ 6:41 amOh yes. I definitely subscribe to this. I am also pretty happy you’re back. It’s been way too quiet without you. I wonder how long it will take me to change my mind on that fact.
Comment by Rob October 21, 2015 @ 8:22 amIt’s Australia Rob. They still think it’s 1976. No wonder you liked living there.
Comment by DH October 21, 2015 @ 6:26 amWell, we sacked a Prime Minister at the end of 1975, so close enough …
Comment by Ian Gee October 21, 2015 @ 6:30 amnice to see everyone is still being fuckwits.
Comment by andy@cynic October 21, 2015 @ 6:42 amThank god you’re back. Did you see Rob won an industry award while you were being a family member?
Comment by DH October 21, 2015 @ 6:54 ami fucking did. adland has decided to fucking kill itself rather than just slowly die. campbell will be better than an overdose of cyanide.
Comment by andy@cynic October 21, 2015 @ 7:07 amMaybe Mumbrella will sell Planner Bears to celebrate their role in history.
Comment by John October 21, 2015 @ 7:38 amwhat the fuck did the bear get medals for? services to fucking cuddling? its an aussie war bear, they should be grateful being acknowledged by the superior british general bear. theyll be wanting to be a fucking republic next.
oi campbell, i see your commie president guy met queen lizzie. his hair looks like a p&g exec. thats more impressive than all the fucking holidays you have blackmailed out of him.
Comment by andy@cynic October 21, 2015 @ 6:45 am#CannonFodder
Comment by Rob October 21, 2015 @ 8:22 amBears for pedo historians. Is that what they call niche marketing?
Comment by Billy Whizz October 21, 2015 @ 7:47 amAKA aussies.
Comment by Billy Whizz October 21, 2015 @ 7:47 amThat’s the first time you have expressed any marketing awareness in your entire career Billy. Congratulations.
Comment by Rob October 21, 2015 @ 8:23 am