The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

So I was in the UK last week and had a couple of hours to go shopping along Oxford Street.

Despite being one of the busiest – and most famous – shopping streets in the World, I was shocked at how bad the actual shopping experience was.

Now I know high-street retailers are being bashed around by the tough economic conditions – not to mention the rise of internet shopping – however the way they are presenting themselves to the public leads me to believe they are doing more than their fair-share in ensuring their demise, rather than their growth.

Two things that really shocked me was their layout and their service policies.

Store after store looked like it had been downsized while trying to keep stock levels the same.

What this resulted in was a cluttered store that did all it could to dis-encourage any customer browsing. What’s worse is that if you were in a clothing store and found something you wanted to try, you were faced with dirty, cluttered ‘changing rooms’ that did all they could to make you turn back, rather than try on.

Seriously, I walked into one where there were 17 coat hangers strewn across the floor.

SEVENTEEN.

And when I went into the cubicle next door, I found the mirror broken and the door wouldn’t lock.

This was not the sort of store you’d expect me to shop at [ie: Everything For A Pound], it was a well known, semi-up market, mainstream fashion brand.

Which led to the second major issue.

Staff.

In short, there was hardly any around.

You could sense that companies had downsized their people as well as their stores to save on cash – but what this led to was a bunch of people who were unhelpful and unavailable to shoppers, either because they were too stressed out with the countless other jobs they had to do to or just had stopped caring.

But there was one area where companies had seemingly invested a lot.

Security guards.

Seriously, they were everywhere.

Millions of them, all talking into their little walkie-talkies and guarding the doors against shoppers who seemed to be spending more time walking out than buying. Unless they were a tourist, because they seemed to not care as long as they could go home with a TopShop or Harrods bag.

Now you might imagine that this situation would be even worse in places like Asia – but you’d be wrong.

Sure labour is cheap, but that hasn’t stopped companies instilling strict standards of shopping environment experience.

Stores are clean, open and well stocked.

Changing rooms are clean, well lit, with staff on hand to help.

And the overall sales assistant approach is one of being genuinely helpful, rather than bitter or busy.

Of course there are exceptions – just like there are in the UK – except in Asia, the exception is a bad experience whereas on Oxford Street, it’s a good one.

Hell, being my parent must of felt like a thankless task.

Apart from just taking care of the little buggers, you have to teach, nurture and develop them as well … so it’s little surprise that so many parents view it as both their most difficult challenge as well as their most rewarding.

The thing is, with all the pressure and time constraints they’re under, they’re bound to make the odd mistake – and that’s the bitch of it, because that one little slip up can be the thing that kids remember forever.

Case in point.

I had an idyllic childhood.

I was raised in a loving, supportive and caring household – where literally all my memories are good ones.

Except one.

I remember it as if it was yesterday and so does my Mum … because anytime I bring it up, she immediately feels terrible and guilty, even though she shouldn’t.

So what is it you cry?

Well that’s the thing, it’s nothing major – it revolves around my mum trying to teach me how to tie my shoelaces.

I can’t exactly remember when it happened – I am hoping it was when I was about 3 or 4 rather than 13 or 14 – but I do remember it happened at the foot of my stairs at our home in Nottingham.

I was listening and watching intently as my Mum showed me how to tie my laces into a knot and then when she told me to have a go, it never worked.

I tried and I tried, but those damn pieces of string conspired to put me in a muddle. Like fractions would a few years into the future.

My Mum is a very patient and kind woman, but after my umpteenth failure, she lost her temper.

She might have even smacked the back of my legs … the only time I ever was hit.

That explains why she feels guilty and sort-of explains why I remember it … but given the whole thing lasted a few minutes and I’ve got into much more trouble with my parents since then, it is kinda weird how that incident is burnt into my mind with far more clarity than many of the other situations I put them through.

It might also explain why I have chosen to wear shoes without laces [bar 2 days last year] for the last 15 years.

And no, I’m not joking.

OK, so it’s not going to be the main reason – but given my belief in ‘frames of reference’ – I would say it certainly had an influence.

As much as it would be easy to think this sort of situation is more prevalent with parents and their young kids – I have a feeling it can affect people much older as well.

Life is so busy for so many of us that we often have to run just to stand still and what this means is that when we have to interact with others, we don’t take the time to make sure they have understood, we just rattle off what has to be said so we can mentally tick off another thing on our daily ‘to do’ list.

Apart from the fact this often results in everything taking longer because the poor sod hasn’t quite grasped what you wanted them to do, it also opens the door to the potential of negative frames of reference – either because of how you treated them up front, or how you react when you see what has been done.

I was browsing through their website when I came across this:

Based on that headline, it looks like 50% of British GP’s are sex pests and sex threats … however when you read the article, you find it’s simply saying that 50% of doctors would like to be free to enter a relationship with one of their patients should the opportunity arise.

Sure, allowing this opens the door to a bunch of possibilities – some unsavoury, especially if a DR takes advantage of a vulnerable patient – but apart from the fact pretty much every action has the possibility of a negative implication so we either ban everything or accept the majority of people are good, law abiding citizens who wouldn’t act in a dishonourable way … the Daily Mail’s ease at writing such scandalous, attention seeking headlines [that actually have little to do with the actual story] is a bloody disgrace.

I appreciate papers are in competition with a whole host of news organisations – many who have much lower overheads and much quicker speeds of reaction – however once you go down that road, credibility starts getting impacted, especially if you profess to be a brand of quality and integrity which is why I always find it amusing when you see ‘shock and awe’ ad headlines like “HAVE SEX FOR LONGER” [which is a real headline from Australia] because while they will definitely get seen by readers/viewers/passers-by, it also ensures the recipient will probably never hold that brand in high regard.