The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

It’s a beautiful country with beautiful people.

And the generosity shown towards me and my family is bordering on breath-taking.

But it’s not perfect.

The image the World has from the outside is not quite what is going on in the inside.

There’s huge inequality.

There’s a big chasm between different cultures.

There’s massive limitations on how youth can express themselves.

And while there are some genuinely good programs – and many, many brilliant people – in place to try and bridge that gap, it exists and it’s surprising how little is talked about it.

One thing that has genuinely shocked me is the attitude towards suicide.

Specifically youth suicide.

Per capita, it has one of – if not the worst – record in the World.

More people die because of suicide here than die in car crashes.

Let that sink in for a second.

And what makes this statistic even more shocking is the attitude that you can’t – or shouldn’t – talk about it. Not openly.

Hell, the media even have restrictions on being able to report it.

Seriously.

Apparently the belief is reporting stories on people who have died because of suicide could encourage more people to do the same.

No … that is seriously what is being claimed.

And even if that were true – which it isn’t – the fact remains New Zealand is already number 1 or 2 in the World [depending on the year] for youth suicide so that means that approach isn’t working so maybe the focus should be on understanding and dealing with the issues that encourage this to happen rather than brush it under the carpet as if it will all go away on it’s own.

What makes this even more insane for me is the government have shown – through its actions in terms of COVID and terrorism – that open dialogue is an incredibly powerful way to gain knowledge, strength and an ability to heal.

OK, so this terrible situation has been happening for way longer than the current government have been in power – and I love Jacinda – but you’d think if anyone would tackle this issue with humanity, openness and compassion, it would be the current PM and her government.

From my early observations, there are some major issues for youth here.

Isolation.

A lack of options and opportunity.

A society that – because of its distance and smaller economic power [due to its relatively low population] – can grow old rather than grow up.

Which all means youth are left with a few options.

1. Conform.
2. Escape.

While conforming is probably not that appealing [is it ever for younger generations?] escape has its issues too.

In the past, one of the ways people expressed this was their ‘OE’ … their overseas experience, where they would go to different countries around the world for adventure. But with COVID having put a stop to all that, we now have a generation who see a future that has – for all intents and purposes – either had the brakes placed on it or been mapped out for them.

Now you could argue all youth face this, and maybe they do, but being part of a small population … about as far away from everyone else as you can get … with less overseas investment than other nations [for reasons detailed above] … means life for many young adults here has less choice, change or opportunity than people in other countries get.

And while you may not think that should matter or you think there is enough here for anybody to be happy … when you’re young and the internet lets you can see the possibilities other youth in other countries are able to enjoy each and every day, the feelings of isolation – physically, mentally and emotionally – that lie within become exponentially intensified.

You may write that off as entitlement.

But it’s not.

It’s a slow crushing of hope.

At an age where you should see everything as possible, for some in NZ, the opposite is true. But you are meant to still be grateful for it because you’re in beautiful NZ – which IS beautiful in more ways than just landscape – but when you’ve grown up here, you might not recognise it because to you, it’s just normal.

It’s an issue that needs discussing.

It’s an issue that needs attitudinal change.

And even if some people want to kid themselves suicides aren’t happening – instead choosing to believe a disproportionate amount of NZ youth just happen to die young – the reality is if they don’t deal with it, then the future of the whole country will be affected.

Youth will leave for their ‘overseas experience’ and just not come back.

Youth will choose alternative lifestyles to embrace and follow.

Youth will see gangs as offering a more exciting future than the one they have.

And while I could be accused of scaremongering, the reality is six hundred and fifty four people died of suicide last year and with few talking about it – or able to talk about it – it may communicate to those in fragile positions, that their country doesn’t care about whether they live or die or count.

I appreciate someone who has not been in the country for long should probably keep their opinions to themselves. I also appreciate this could be read at someone complaining about a country that has very kindly let his family come here to live.

But neither of these views would be right.

I say this because I love this country.

I say this because I am grateful to this country.

I say this because I’ve met people who I know care deeply about this issue.

I say this because NZ has its shit together on so many things the rest of the World need to learn from and follow.

I say this because I want NZ to prosper and grow and believe youth have the ability to help make that happen if they’re allowed to explore and express their ideas – good and bad.

I say this because I’ve lived in many different countries and the situation here is unlike anything I’ve seen, bar maybe China in 2007.

I say this because 654 people died by suicide last year.

Six hundred and fifty four.