The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

Love Hurts For All It’s Wonderfulness …
September 5, 2019, 6:15 am
Filed under: A Bit Of Inspiration, Comment, Family, Fatherhood, Love

Today is Freddie Mercury’s birthday.

He would have been 73.


While I would love to hear what he was creating if he were alive today, maybe it is dying so young that has made him immortal?

Immortality is an interesting one.

Because while it doesn’t exist in physical form, it does in terms of emotions and memories.

Or so I thought …

This post is about a story that came up on my Facebook feed from years ago that had made a huge impression on me when I first encountered it.

It’s the story of a mother who lost her son to a brain tumour and then – by pure chance – met the young man who had been given his heart.

It is beautiful, loving and heartbreakingly sad all at the same time, especially the last 5 words of the story.

You can read it at the bottom of this post.

However, when it first came out, I wasn’t a father and so reading it again as the proud Dad of an energetic 4 year old, meant the effect it had on me has been even more powerful.

I have a better understanding of what Freda Carter must have felt.

How meeting the boy who lived because her son sadly passed, let her once again feel close to her precious son.

No anger … no bitterness or resentment … just a chance to have one last chance with someone who has gone.

Apart from being a deeply emotional story, I think I connected to it deeply because I had lost my parents and even now, would do anything to have one more moment with them.

But now I’m a Dad, well … it gives me anguish just thinking about it.

And that’s why I have even more respect for Andy and his wife.

Without going into too much detail, they faced an unbelievably scary situation when their beautiful daughter Bonnie was very young.

While many would fall apart, they handled everything with utter grace and calm.

No anger.

No blame.

No pity.

Of course they were scared and I know behind the glare of their daughters, doctors, friends and families eyes, there were many tears and fears shared … but they were absolutely focused and resolute on ensuring their daughter was in an environment of love, calmness and compassion and they ensured everyone they knew had to abide by those rules.

At the time I think everyone understood their wishes but were concerned they were adding even more pressure on themselves, however now that time has passed and Bonnie is brilliantly well, I see the strength of character and love that drove them forward.

I hope I am never in the situation they faced.

But if I am, they would be the inspiration for how to best deal with it.

As would Freda Carter.

Ensuring the focus is on loving what is precious, not hating what you can’t control.

11 Comments so far
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Lots of tears.

Comment by Mary Bryant

What a powerful story especially, as you said, the last sentence. And Freddie being 73 is incredible as well. Immortality can be achieved in many ways and with many audiences.

Comment by Pete


Comment by Jemma King

Discovering how old Freddie would be today is thought provoking enough, but the story of Freda triggers an incredible amount of emotions.

The loss of a child is beyond my comprehension. I do not wish to even try and imagine it. But the moment Freda touches her sons heart through the body of another young man is extraordinary.

Your tribute to Andrew is also very touching. I remember at the time thinking the way they were dealing with their situation was incredibly respectful to Bonnie and I am still so happy everything ended so positively.

A very emotional post today, thank you for sharing Robert.

Comment by Lee Hill

I was not expecting to read a post like this today. It has brought tears to my eyes. Admittedly more for Freda and Andrew than Freddie.

What incredible stories. A parents worst nightmare. I know Andrew and Gabi prefer to look at the future rather than rehash their darkest period, but how they, like Freda, put love and respect ahead of anger and pain is one of the most powerful acts I’ve ever witnessed.

Comment by George


Comment by Pete

+ 2

Comment by Rob


Comment by DH

Kisses to Bonnie, Andy, Gabriella, Freda and Freddie.

Comment by Katerina

you lovely prick.

Comment by andy@cynic

I hate to admit it, but Freddie would still be a star at 73

Comment by DH

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