I’m going to let you into a secret, I wasn’t sure if I was ready to be a Dad.
That doesn’t mean I didn’t want to be, I just wasn’t sure if I was equipped with the skills that I felt I needed to be a good one.
A similar thing happened when I was first made head of a department.
I loved the idea of it, but I was terrified that I didn’t have the skills or experience needed to be really good at it.
Some would say I’m still not.
Even when I started cynic, I had doubts.
Again, the idea of starting my own company was very exciting for me, but I was concerned I lacked the knowledge to make it work.
In all cases I was wrong …
I am a good Dad.
I [think] I am a good leader of my team.
I am proud of all we achieved at cynic.
The thought I may have not done any of those things because I wasn’t sure if I was ready, scares me to death.
The fact I could have allowed myself to miss out on some of the greatest things I’ve ever done – some of the greatest things I’ll ever do – just because I thought I wasn’t experienced enough shows the danger of contentment versus fulfilment.
Sure, you could argue what you haven’t done can’t hurt you … but the reality is I wanted to do all of these things, so it’s not like I would have gone on in my life without thinking about it and for me, a life left wondering is far worse than a life of trying and failing.
Part of the reason I was able to ‘take the plunge’ was because I was very lucky to have people around me who continually helped, supported and encouraged my growth … whether that was my wife, my friends, my bosses or my colleagues.
But part of it was because I realised there’s rarely a time where people feel ‘they are ready’ … the ones who progress just had a desire to learn, explore, and lead while also understanding – and communicating – that making mistakes was inevitable.
It’s not that they want to make mistakes … it’s just that they knew in their quest to make things happen, it would happen.
In fact in my experience, it’s the people who focus on always being safe … never making a mistake … that ultimately stop moving forward.
That doesn’t mean you should ever think you know everything … learning, talking, listening are vital elements to making better decisions, regardless of your experience … however if the desire to progress is there, then you are as ready as you probably ever will be.
As an old boss once said to me, “if you don’t take control of the situation, it will take control of you” … so if you have the desire – a real desire, not some passing level of interest – then go for it because if truth be told, this moment is probably as good a time as ever.
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What a fantastic post Robert. Excellent stuff and very good advice.
Comment by George October 30, 2015 @ 6:19 amWell, you were one of the people who gave me the permission and support to make it happen, so you have to say that. Ha.
Comment by Rob October 30, 2015 @ 6:43 amwhat the fuck was i? london smog. fuckers.
Comment by andy@cynic October 30, 2015 @ 6:50 amA truly excellent read Robert. I have said it before, but you should write more about these topics. If they inspire me, an old dog with no new tricks, they will surely inspire those who still have the prospect of possibilities with their career.
Comment by Lee Hill October 30, 2015 @ 6:34 amAn old dog that has metaphorically won Crufts.
And yes, I am up early. One word: teething. (Otis, not me)
Comment by Rob October 30, 2015 @ 6:41 amgood lad otis. thatll teach your dad for fucking off on another european freebie.
Comment by andy@cynic October 30, 2015 @ 6:46 amThat’s nothing, he’s off to Canada on Sunday for 10 days. Less than a year old and he’s already done America, Europe and Australia. A chip off the old block … except instead of a client or company paying, it’s me. Must work on that.
Comment by Rob October 30, 2015 @ 6:56 amThe old blagger king is dead. Hail the new blagger king. King Otis.
Comment by DH October 30, 2015 @ 7:51 am“I am a good Dad. I [think] I am a good leader of my team. I am proud of all we achieved at cynic.”
I thought the Brits weren’t allowed to be outspokenly positive about their own abilities and qualities. How American confidence of you. Good read and I’m very happy you decided to start cynic.
Comment by Bazza October 30, 2015 @ 6:39 amI know. I have no idea what came over me.
Comment by Rob October 30, 2015 @ 6:42 ambefore you become too fucking big headed campbell, remember jill did all the hard work (of which sleeping with you was the fucking hardest bit), your team might have a very fucking different perspective on your leadership skills and cynic would have been fuck all without me. basically you were a lucky bastard riding on the coat tails of every talented fucker you ever conned into being part of your life. dont cry, thats a fucking achievement in itself. parasite.
Comment by andy@cynic October 30, 2015 @ 6:49 amI can always rely on you to make sure I am keeping it real. Even when I don’t want to. Ha.
Comment by Rob October 30, 2015 @ 6:53 amMe too Baz.
Comment by Pete October 30, 2015 @ 8:05 amI’m unready ready to stop coming to this blog.
Comment by DH October 30, 2015 @ 7:46 amMe too.
Comment by Rob October 30, 2015 @ 9:49 amLove it. Great post Rob.
Comment by Pete October 30, 2015 @ 8:05 amDOPE post
Comment by toto November 1, 2015 @ 10:52 pm