The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

China’s Got Zzzz Zzzz Zzzz
September 8, 2015, 6:15 am
Filed under: Chinese Culture, Entertainment, Family

Like most countries, China has a bunch of talent shows.

One, is basically their version of ‘Britain’s Got Talent’.

Now while these programs attract all manner of ‘acts’, it’s kind-of reassuring to know that China’s version has ‘performers’ that take things to a whole different level.

Ladies and gentlemen. Boys and girls. Cop a load of this:

I honestly don’t know what I like most.

The little girl who is making the animals sleep.

The judges endless stream of exaggerated faces.

Or the elegant models who are just there to lift a lid.

It’s madness. Sheer, brilliant madness.

It’s basically a perfect metaphor for this country.

Crazy. Elegant. Charming. Confused. Cute. Filial. Weird. Replication of anothers success.

Mind you, if anyone knows that little girls number, I wouldn’t mind seeing if see can make her trick work on Otis.

22 Comments so far
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what the fuck was that?

Comment by andy@cynic

My life.

Comment by Rob

Not much work, a cute kid, some animals, hot chicks and a crowd of idiots letting you think what you do is talent. Yeah, your life.

Comment by Billy Whizz

no fucking wonder their economy is tanking. that little fuck has put everuone in commie central to sleep.

Comment by andy@cynic

From showing off all their nuclear weapons to this. Bet the worlds military experts are freaking out with confusion.

Comment by DH

is otis keeping you awake at night? good fucking work otis. i knew i could rely on you.

Comment by andy@cynic

He has a cold. It’s worse than being held in Guantanmo Bay and being tortured for secrets. Then I think what you went through with Bonnie and I realise I need to shut up and just ask how the hell you managed to get through it all.

Comment by Rob

i fucking dont know either campbell. shes fucking tougher than every fucking superhero and action hero ever fabricated.

Comment by andy@cynic

That is the truth.

Comment by George

I like how the producer cuts away from the sleeping animal to whichever judge they think looks like that animal. Frog judge has a particularly strong resemblance.

Comment by DH

Who knew sleeping animals could make such dramatic television.

Comment by Lee Hill

This helps explain why you feel so at home there Robert. The whole range of crazy.

Comment by George

match made in fucking heaven.

Comment by andy@cynic

China’s version of Dr Doolittle is impressive.

Comment by Pete

More like the perfect metaphor for this blog.

Comment by John

Except Campbell looks like the frog rather than the little girl. Behaves like her though.

Comment by DH

Over-tolerated performer who makes a huge meal of everything, succeeds only in putting everyone to sleep and nobody can make any sense of the whole event.

Comment by John

You’re in a different league.

Comment by DH

And not in the way Forest are.

Comment by John

Forest could come good. Oh yes. Maybe. OK, not a chance.

Comment by Rob

only if they fucking change their name to chelsea you delusional tool.

Comment by andy@cynic

[…] TV programs that show a young girl make animals fall asleep on National […]

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