The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

The high end – anything from US$2500+ – have been, in the main, doing quite well as they have evolved from time-keeping device, to item of jewellery and status.

OK, they’ve always been that, but with so many so many other symbols of status and wealth – like fashion or technology or cars – now being within the reach of many … expensive watches have become more desirable as people try to ‘differentiate themselves’ from everyone else who is trying to project an image that is neither true or affordable.

Ahem.

I think I wrote ages ago how I met a furniture designer in Miami who said IKEA had made the uber-wealthy embrace bad taste because, in their quest to separate themselves from ‘the common herd’, they were buying more outlandish furniture in a bid to look different from the semi-tasteful homes that IKEA now enabled most people to enjoy … something that was once the domain of only the wealthy and stylish.

That’s certainly seems to be the case with watches as they not only get bigger than a sundial, but look fucking horrendous in a bid to ensure people see it on the owners wrist. Something that is not difficult to achieve given it looks like you have a satellite dish attached to your arm.

Anyway, I digress.

The reason for this is because I recently saw this ad in an American men’s magazine:

Yes … it’s a poncy looking watch but get this, instead of costing US$1,095, they were letting you have it for only US$179.

WOW … that’s over an 80% discount.

EIGHTY PERCENT.

How on earth do they do that?

Maybe because it was only that price for 12 seconds … just long enough to be able to justify that claim in an ad.

“But Rob, it say’s it has real diamonds in it?” I hear you cry.

Yes … no doubt industrial diamonds, worth about 0.0001 of a cent.

My favourite bit is that in the details, they say the strap is ‘solid stainless steel’ and ’18 carat yellow gold’.

Which one folks?

Or maybe – probably – do you mean it’s stainless steel made to look like 18 carat gold?

The bad news for the people behind this ad is that it screams ‘SCAM’ even though it’s trying so, so, so, so hard to project an image of suave sophistication.

Seriously, I feel so sorry for anyone who falls for it … they think they’ll be seen as something awesome, but really they’ll be seen as a cheap tool with delusions of grandeur. Similar – but totally different – to those pricks who spend $20,000 on the iWatch in rose gold.

WHAT THE HELL ARE THEY THINKING? [Sorry Baz]

While I mocked an ad that was trying to sell a similar bullshit watch ages ago, at least they had the good grace to admit it was a watch designed to fool others … but this one is trying to take itself so seriously, which all goes to show, if it’s too good to be true, it probably isn’t.