The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

Not as petty as John Dodds, but petty all the same.

And one thing that gets right on my nerves is when I see ads like this one from Lufthansa.

There are so many reasons this ad annoys me …

Putting aside the fact having internet access on a plane basically robs me of the last place I can hide from all the demands and expectations of life and work so I will do all I can to avoid any airline offering that service … Lufthansa have decided to promote this ‘innovation’ with one of the blandest and most contrived pieces of shit since the last tele-movie by Hallmark or a Singapore Airlines ad.

Everything about this ad bothers me.

EVERYTHING.

But the bit that gets my goat slightly more than everything else is the fact the woman is holding her iPhone 4 the wrong way round.

Of course it’s because it she used the front camera, the ‘idea’ in the ad would be lost because all you’d end up seeing is the back of the phone, but as far as I am concerned, that would be a great thing because the whole concept is rubbish, built around the term ‘airmail’ rather than an idea that makes on board wi-fi sound appealing.

Fuck, when you think of all the things they could have done and they decide this is the way to go – something blander than even a beige Volvo – you wonder what the hell the sex life of the Lufthansa board must be like.

OK, maybe that’s just me.

From being able to position themselves as the ‘social network’ airline … through to ‘the plane that lets you be an annoying show-off bastard to your friends’ … to the plane ‘for the paranoid’ … to the airline for ‘the business traveller who wants to be there for his family even when he’s not there for his family’ … to the plane ‘for the efficient from the national airline of the efficient’ … anything would be better than this rubbish, though given the message of the ad and the fact the ‘talent’ can’t even hold an iPhone 4 the right way round, it would appear Lufthansa have identified a core audience of tech imbeciles, probably because they’ll be the only idiots who’ll be happy to pay $10 a minute to send an email of themselves sitting on a fucking plane.

This ad might work for people with all the personality of magnolia wallpaper, but for anyone with half a brain – or even an iPhone 4 – it’s more likely to drive them straight to Aeroflot or worse, United Airlines.