The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

Not For Gary Glitter …
September 20, 2010, 5:49 am
Filed under: Comment

So it’s Monday … the start of another week filled with dramas, problems, confusion and arguments … except for me it isn’t because as of Wednesday, we’re on a stream of national holidays – and the best bit is that thanks to the way the holidays days fall – I end having almost 3 weeks off.


God I just love [fake] communism!

Now I know that this news will probably fill you with a mixture of delight and anger.

Delight … because it means you won’t have to endure my ridiculous ramblings for a while.
Anger … because you want a national holiday of that duration for yourself.

Well tough shit, that’s the price you pay for living in a country where you don’t have any hassle buying any book with the word ‘Revolution’ in the title, even if it’s ‘Cooking Revolution’ … but to cheer you up, I want to leave you with a clip that can’t fail to warm the cockles of your heart – even if it’s as cold and dark as Andy’s’.

Let me introduce you to 5 year old Howard Wong … the youngest, tough-motherfucking drummer in the entire Universe … except at 43 seconds, where he magically transforms into the most delightful, happy bundle of smiles you could ever hope to see.

When was the last time you were that happy?

When was the last time you did something that made you smile from ear to ear?

When was the last time you got truly lost in the moment?

I’m not talking family or personal stuff – I’m talking about normal work days?

The thing is Howard is a pretty mean drummer, which means he’s been banging away for quite a while … and yet despite that, there are still moments in his performance that makes him break out into an irrepressibly huge smile.

Sure, he’s performing in front of an audience that makes this sort of reaction more likely – especially as they all seem to love him – but still, his happiness and joy is infectious and that should be something we all experience and not just when we’re 4 years old.

I think that is why I love what I do.

Sure there’s an unbelievable amount of shit to wade through … sure there’s frustrations, arguments and a large dollop of conservatism to deal with … but at the end of the day, I get to explore, learn and do stuff with a whole host of interesting, intriguing and talented people and that is way better than 90% of people in jobs.

Yes I get paid well to do what I do [whatever that is] but I can honestly say I felt the same way when I started cynic and didn’t have 2 dollars to rub together – so maybe the secret is to make more decisions [or time] for the things you love rather than focus on what pays or demands the most, because even though life places more pressures and expectations on us as we get older, a life without fulfillment is no life at all.

35 Comments so far
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Three weeks. That’s really disgusting.

Comment by rafik

I know, I feel disgusted myself but it’s a sacrifice I’ll just have to make.

Comment by Rob

its ok campbell, not having to read your shit makes it far more fucking palatable.

Comment by andy@cynic

you love what you do because you do fuck all and get paid a mountain of cash for it. its like youre a banking exec and have one of their infamous golden handshake payoffs except in your case its more of a massive fucking pension.

then paying you to do fuck all works out cheaper than letting you do work for clients because in no fucking time youll be costing w+k millions as you agree to doing more and more stuff for free just because you get so easily excited about doing some project or other.

dont you realise campbell, clients cotton on to your over enthisiastic ways and then start saying they need help on exciting briefs just so youll do it for free? you cost us a fucking fortune thanks to your labrador puppy ways you twat.

if it wasnt for me and auntie youd be living on the street rather than living the property tycoon fucking dream you enjoy. and are you grateful? are you fuck. bastard.

now back to the shit youve written today.

well im glad its not something sweet about your folks because i was getting seriously pissed off being nice.

3 weeks. 3 fucking weeks. i thought those commies made everyone work 82 hours a day. guess theyre so fucking rich they dont give a fuck anymore about doing actual work when they can live off the interest theyre getting being the worlds bank. sounds like my fucking builders policy. makes sense because 2 of the nail pounding lazy fucks are chinese.

talking of chinese that kid rocks. bless the little fucker but unless he ends up banging the beat in some big time band hes going to end up banging his head against the wall instead of banging hot groupies.

dont know what to make of this post except its filled me with rage and jealousy.

3 weeks. 3 fucking weeks.

Comment by andy@cynic

Like Billy said, you can tell you’ve been holding in a bit motherfucking rant for some time, so let me first congratulate you on your patience as well as your beautifully executed character/industry assassination – it is a wonder to see, especially [again as Billy said, which is quite amazing] the comment about Howard’s future which is evil and yet genius at the same time.

Finally, I am sorry that my holiday has caused you such pain … pain that transcends even an overly indulgent and sycophantic post linked back to planning and advertising … but it’s not all in vain Andy because your misery is my happiness so you’ve made the next 3 weeks even sweeter than I thought it was possible to be.

Thank you. What a friend you are.

Comment by Rob

yes i fucking am. so send me a cheque you tight fuck and make my life better after right royally fucking it all up.

Comment by andy@cynic

You should have heeded your Mum’s advice. Look after the pennies and the divorces will look after themselves.

Comment by Rob

you ask….

“when was the last time you were that happy? when was the last time you did something that made you smile from ear to ear? when was the last time you got truly lost in the moment?”

well the answer is about 14 seconds before i read this pile of oprah/dr quack bollocks and then realised if you have 3 weeks off youre going to rub it in by coming to fucking see me.

doesnt the prez realise those commie bastards have just declared war and are using something far fucking worse than nukes?

wheres george w when you need him. hed see the situation for what it is and let his trigger happy, fucked up brain, war loving finger press the big red nuke strike button before you even have the chance to call lee and ask for another freebie upperclass flight to ruin my fucking life.

suddenly my lazy fuck builders dont look so bad but they still look fucking lazy. and builders. even if they dont actually build anything. wankers.

Comment by andy@cynic

You’ve been holding that in haven’t you Andy? Cannes gold lion quality rant there especially the “banging his head against the wall, not banging hot groupies” line. I remain a believer.

Comment by Billy Whizz

i work to a much higher standard than that cannes fucking lion shit. any fuck can win those, even fucking draft fcb, but no one can be like me, not even old robot voice hawkings.

Comment by andy@cynic

I know you think I don’t do anything … actually, I know you think planners don’t do anything … but we do, which is why the knowledge of this impending uber-holiday ensured I got off my arse and spoke to Uncle Lee before you could do anything to stop him.

See you Wednesday. Maybe.

[Cue evil laugh]

Comment by Rob

bollocks and fuck.

Comment by andy@cynic

youre worse than the z grade celebrities who get invited to shit events and only turn up for the fucking goody bags. im impressed. im also washing my fucking hair so dont bother coming or if you have to, bring a hammer so i can put you to some good fucking use.

dont worry campbell, i know youre shit at diy, i was going to get you to smash your face repeatedly instead.

Comment by andy@cynic

Me? With a hammer? Based on past experiences, I’d probably miss.

Comment by Rob

Can what you do even technically be classified as a job, even if I ignore what you actually do and talk about what your job title says you should do.

3 weeks is a slap in the face to all hard working Americans. And the slackers.

Comment by Billy Whizz

Your job at FOX News has been assured with that final statement Billy.

Comment by Rob

Jealousy is such an ugly trait don’t you think?

Comment by Rob

but not quite as ugly as your fucking mug.

Comment by andy@cynic

Snappy comeback. That doesn’t sound like the ramblings of a 5 year old kid at all. And before you say it, yes – it does take one to know one.

Comment by Rob

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you CYNIC.

Comment by The Kaiser

2 dollars well spent.

Comment by John

They’re paying in installments John so it’s not even a dollar yet.

Comment by Rob

There’s little point to adding to the content above (apart from, in the loving what you do vein, Andy and Rob their love hate relationship that borders on homoerotic)
In terms of making decisions based on what you love, there are few people who are fortunate enough to be able to do that. It’s lovely when you can, but most have to answer the call of duty and responsibility.
However, basing your life on what you think others think you ought to be doing, or what is the recieved wisdom is, is mostly stupid.
Problem is, most of us are useless at predicting what will actually make us happy, so basically we’re fucked.

Comment by northern

Homoerotic. That say’s more about you than us I think NP.

You’re right of course, very few people can do purely what they want due to responsibilities and I am one of them, albeit with more flexibility than most … however what I would say is that there is often a way to turn something you have to do into something you want to do or find interesting to do, it’s all about finding the connector between expected result and an approach that marries your personal interest and/or approach.

I suppose the best thing I’ve ever been able to do with my job is to find ways to make everything interesting – be it a point of sale brief or a new brand plan. Of course you still have to deliver something within a specific timeframe, but whether it’s me talking to prostitutes or recommending NPD, there’s always something in there that makes it interesting for me that hopefully, in turn, makes it interesting for everyone involved with it … and I include the audience.

It’s not easy, but I always get a bit pissed when people say “I just have bad/boring clients” when the reality is that maybe it’s them who are the bad or boring planner. Not always, but often.

Comment by Rob

Oh no it doesn’t, it doesn’t say anything about me, apart from I’m comfortable with all aspects of my sexuality and you too…are not.
I agree in our job (by our job the loose discipline of planning, our specifics jobs are very different, as this post, or celebration of being a dawdling flaneur content to spend three weeks on silk pillows, demonstrates)making the banal exciting is a core discipline and you should treat clients as an audience you have to persuade as much as their customers, but outside of planning, I have worked in call centres, apart from colouring books, there’s nothing to spice that up (apart from turbo shandies and innaproprate canoodling in shady nightclubs after work.
That said, I did work as a gym instructor for a bit after I graduated..which sounds dull as dishwater until you factor in the bored, rich housewives that used to come.
What were we talking about again?

Comment by northern

so you were a gym instructor and you made bored, rich housewives come? sorry to break this to you groper but they were faking it.

Comment by andy@cynic

I did well in tips though and you should have seen how proficient they became with pelvic floor exercises

Comment by northern

is that because they had to use their pelvic muscles to stop them from pissing themselves as they watched your attempts at being northern fucking casanova?

Comment by andy@cynic


Comment by northern

rob, if nothing else, this three week holiday of yours has incited the most beautiful prose i’ve heard from the crew here in a long time. jealousy, it seems, is a curse and a fantastic writer.

i can honestly say that, right now, i fuckin’ love what i do. yesterday i had one of those moments that howard had at 00:43 – out of control fun times with a smile so big it hurt my fucking cheeks. awesomeness.

thank you for that video of howard. i suspect that andy may be right about his banging career, but i still fucking hope he’s just being a grumpy twat. and that howie will prove everyone wrong by being 1000 types of awesome in the future.

Comment by lauren

fuck me now laurens gone bloody oprah. the fucking world is doomed. how about we let howard get past his balls dropping before we start adding some more pressure about whether hell bang his head or his groupies. my bet the poor bastard will be working at burtons and boring polyester shirt wearing sad fucks with what could have been but then i hate the idea of anyone but me having a life with a happy ending and im not talking about the cheeky hand job variety northern tried to get from one of his rich bored housewives.

Comment by andy@cynic

i wish i just went oprah. the australian govt is spending a fuck-load million and something on having her schmaltzy arse carted over for some kind of love-fest shindig. i’d do it for half that. and everyone would still get a free t-shirt.

Comment by lauren

oh, and you’re lucky that i have gone oprah, andy, otherwise i’d have your hide for that comparison. 🙂

Comment by lauren

are you offering to spank me? at fucking last.

and why the fuck are the aussie government twats having oprah there? i didnt think they liked none whites? i bet its because you have a ginger welsh bitch as pm now and she wants to not be the only one picked on. cunning sheep fuckers those welsh.

Comment by andy@cynic

It’s clear.

Andy is the Martin Sorrell to your Steve Henry…


Comment by Rob Mortimer

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