The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

Are Citibank Doing Irony?
October 15, 2008, 6:50 am
Filed under: Comment

This is Citibank’s logo …

Citibank ATM by stonetako920 Photo: Stonetako920

… and in true corporate toady style, their ad agency have incorporated the arc into all executions.

They’ve made it represent a bridge between where you [the customer] are, and where you can be with Citibank’s expert help.

Of course it’s as cliched as hell – like all those ‘we care’ and ‘partnership’ ads the banks have been churning out for decades – however the reason I’m writing about this is because I’ve just seen a new execution of this campaign that if I didn’t know better, I’d swear had been done as a pisstake by some cheeky creatives.


Dreams to realities.

Who the hell are they trying to kid?

The World is in economic hell – of which Citibank are one of the guilty parties – and they are still putting out ads claiming their expertise can help people achieve their dreams.

Well I tell you what Mr Citibank, I think a lot of people’s dreams were to not lose their savings, pension or houses – but you haven’t exactly crowned yourself in glory with ‘promise’ have you?


I actually believe it’s a really good time for a bank to advertise – however this sort of mindless shit just pisses people off – just like reading about bankers who say they are economising by buying $100 dollar bottles of wine instead of $1,000 and/or only buying 2nd hand FIVE FIGURE WATCHES instead of brand new.

Give me a gun and a few of their addresses and I’ll do the World a favour.

Anyway, getting back to the ad …

Why on earth didn’t the agency point out how this ad could alienate the public?

As I said, maybe it was the agencies way of having a little dig – but I doubt it.

The only thing I can hope for is this is Citibank’s way of apologising for being naughty little boys and girls.

What do I mean?

Well maybe Citibank are admitting they sold people “DREAMS” but could only give them a horrible reality?

I guess we’ll know for sure if the next ads feature …

High Interest Rate becomes Homeless

Savings becomes Debt

Bank becomes Building For Sale

Funnily enough, a very conservative bank that we pitched for last year [and lost] approached us a few days ago because they now realise our proposed core idea [Sometimes It’s Good To Be A Little Slower] would be incredibly attractive to members of the public who are desperately looking for security rather than growth . What a shame they went with an agency who told them what they wanted to hear [Dynamic partnership. Hahahaha!] rather than make a call that could have had massive benefits for them today.

As I have said many times before – corporate ego is one of the most dangerous things in business today.

Ooooh I’m pissy today – a perfect Monday mood, ha!

19 Comments so far
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If you put two dots above that curve it looks like a frown. Then the ad makes complete sense and is VERY in touch with reality at the moment. In that light, it’s genius and should win a Grand Prix.

Comment by Age

i fucking leave the united states for a few weeks, i come back and theyre now the fucking untidy states. what the fucks been going on? i tell you what, a bunch of greedy fucking bankers taking the fucking piss and then having the audacity to spend more of their bankrupt fucking stock putting out more bland mindless shit to the masses.

it would be a good time for a bank to advertise if they had something to fucking say or better still did something of fucking value to the fuckers that have been keeping them in crystal and whores but i guess thats too much to fucking ask isnt it.

bunch of fucking cocks and the guys at the agency that let this pass need lynching. if this was ancient france theyd be a fucking revolution over this but instead the government are just bailing the fuckers out. i fucking note theyre not wiping the debt of the poor fuckers in 3rd world countries even though thats another fucking subprime waiting to happen. look after their own thats all that matters the fucking evil wankers. its good to be back

Comment by andy@cynic

Welcome back Andrew.

Your comment about third World debt is a very interesting point and I am surprised I haven’t heard anyone else mention this issue especially the pedestal dogooders of Bono and Oprah etc.

I am not sure whether it can be classed as another subprime mortgage disaster waiting to happen but it certainly is a debt very few people generally think will be paid back in full. Then if Robert’s beloved “The Economic Hitman” is correct, that was exactly the point of giving the loans in the first place.

Comment by Lee Hill

lee, bono has been mentioning it – saying that mr bush found it impossible to find $20 billion dollars in 2000 to wipe third world debt, yet can find $700 billion dollars to bail out a series of private organisations whose choices are based on greed and chance. and for the first time ever, i’m agreeing with him. i feel ill.

Comment by lauren

bono must have copied me the irish fucker. but then i copied campbell and campbell copied some google economist he was having a lovefest with so what does that say about us except were all a bunch of thieving fucks who like to pretend we have all the answers to the universes fucking problems. except i do and its a fucking thirty second tv ad. oh no it isnt ive copied fallons answer to saving the planet. where the fuck are my fucking original thoughts? ill tell you where, in a place where you dont get the fuckers for free. ive had 5 cups of starfucks today can you tell?

Comment by andy@cynic

andy dear, it’s medication time..

Comment by lauren

There’s more drunks on here than George Parker’s blog. Nice post Robert even if I can’t remember what it was about after Andy’s stream of semi conciousness. 🙂

Comment by Bazza

I’m on a bit of a “financial commentary” role at the moment myself.

The “cooking” presentation is mine.

Good morning.

Comment by Marcus

Is there not a small failure on the part of the Bono’s of this world?

I mean (with all due respect to those who died and their relatives) it took “just” 6000 lives (American) for the US to go on a all out war in the Middle East. 6000 lives (yes they were perhaps scapegoats to existing plans) to create a coalition of the willing all over the world.

How the fuck are we not able to convert millions of death by aids and hunger into some fucking action?

Yes Bono has a point, but look in one of the million mirrors you got hanging in your house B. Half full glass some would say, but it’s not enough, by a fucking longshot.

Bet ya if enough yanks (who watch or are on Fox News) felt the pain close to home, they’d dip into some secret fucking gazillion dollar fund.

Not all lives are worth the same, let’s use that fact for a fucking change.

and Bazza, come out the alchie closet already. it’s 2008 for fuck sake!

Comment by nicky

Too angry to comment on this. The ads are laughable.
Just a point, bankers are wankers (will one of them please say sorry) but lets not forget that the US government and Mr Greenspan kept credit to cheap, and Mr Brown kind of did the same.
No one forced so many people do borrow up to the hilt.
Yes, rich bankers brought us to this, but they were aided by governments who should know better, and maybe one or two consumers who went mad in the sweet shop.
AND who de-regulated the banks? Who gave them these half witted greedy fuckers the chance to wreck things? Back in the 80’s. As bad an idea as Simple Minds.

Comment by northern

I did no such thing NP!

Comment by Marcus

Oh yes you did.

This is a pantomime isn’t it?

Comment by Bazza

Oh no I didn’t.

Comment by Marcus

Putting things back onto the subject of his post [as I am allowed to do, cough-cough] I’ve just heard that the rumoured reason behind Russia pulling out of Georgia was NOT because of international pressure, but because they knew how the financial crisis was going to affect them and they wanted to get out before they were broke.

Yes – Russia stopped killing people because the fear of bankrupcy was greater than international sanctions.

Not sure if it is entirely true – but it’s the sort of shit I can believe. So at least there’s one bit of good coming out of all this shit.

Comment by Robert

Well that killed the conversation stone dead.

Comment by John

Everything about this post has made me really sad for the human race. Even with all the good intention and love, we’re always going to be held down and controlled by self serving people more powerful, more evil than us. It really does bring me the fuck down.

So much for positive Wednesday, Rob!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Comment by Age

youve met campbell dodds, you know he can murder a conversation let alone fucking kill it.

and what the fuck is “positive wednesday”? campbell isnt trying to be all fucking nicey nice again is he? jesus christ those google fuckers have a lot to answer for 🙂

Comment by andy@cynic

And in other Citi irony:

Comment by Leon Jacobs

Judging by Citi’s current financial situation, they may be put to sleep permenantly!

Comment by Robert

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