The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

So I was reading some crappy UK magazine and came across a column by Wayne Rooney’s other half, Coleen.

Now I appreciate she’s just riding the wave of celebrity [even if it is by ‘association’ rather than her own achievements] but the thought some mag is paying her god-knows-how-much for pointless articles likes this makes me sick, not to mention unbelievably jealous.

Anyway, because I quite fancy getting paid a load of dosh for some pointless wank [which I appreciate many of you think I already do – and to them I say you should be just grateful I don’t make my blog pay-per-view] I hereby put the following article up for ‘auction’ and my ‘celebrity association’ is my Mum – who was part of the original Star Wars team and also came up with the Little Miss Woman idea for Roger Hargreaves.

Oh and because all tabloid ‘journalists’ seem to have a photo taken by some vaseline smeared camera lense in an attempt to look all mysterious and enchanting, I hereby have this for attachment.

Right, that’s sorted … now I just need to sit back and wait for the offers!  Ahem.

In all seriousness, this Coleen woman has really pissed me off.

I know most people in the UK have had to endure her for quite a few years, but because I’m out in Asia, her ‘attitude and manner’ is all quite new to me and while her ‘Italian Food Outing’ article made me snort with derision, the way she dealt with the tragic shooting of young Everton fan, Rhys Jones, made me angrier than hell.

Have a look at this article she wrote …

Next to this article was a bloody photo of the actual wreath at the funeral!!!

How on earth can she say they made a ‘private gesture’ then print all of it in some fucking cheap and tacky weekly magazine?

Now I’m sure she didn’t mean it to come out that way, but it smacks of exploitation and at the very least demonstrates an alarming lack of taste and judgement – a bit like those fools at M&C India who did those dodgy ‘fake ads’.

So all this leads to a question … despite having more access to information than at any other point in history, do you think the average person is less Worldly and knowledgeable or more?

Come on, what do you think?

Is technology empowering the average person or is it ultimately hindering us because rather than ‘learning’, we’re actually becoming a society of ‘finders’ … where the biggest effort most of us make in seeking knowledge is typing our question into Google.

A word of warning to anyone who has a Facebook account.

If somebody called bm_tnoo7@hotmail.com adds you to their Facebook list, DON’T accept it because its a hacker. 

Apparently if they get your acceptance [or anyone who is linked to your list] they can then get access to all your personal computer files and make your life a living hell.

May I be so bold to suggest you tell all your Facebook contacts about this issue because if anyone accepts the invitation, we all suffer.

I work in an industry that continually argues about the value of branding, creativity, NPD, innovation [etc etc] when the truth of the matter is we’re never going to reach a conclusive answer because each situation is different and they are all influenced by a plethora of constantly changing and evolving external factors.

Saying that, I do believe a pragmatic brand idea [that transcends the category norms] is far more effective [both interms of consumer loyalty and marketing expenditure] than just trying to ‘brainwash’ consumer purchase through a stream of monotonous advertising messages or degrees-of-change product development.

Last year, Colgate toothpaste spent – in the Asia region alone – US$639,520,000 on advertising.

Look at that number again … SIX HUNDRED AND THIRTY NINE MILLION, FIVE HUNDRED AND TWENTY THOUSAND [U.S.] DOLLARS.

Sure that figure covers every channel of their marketing communication [including the launch of their ‘Halal’ toothpaste – I kid you not] but for such a massive amount of money, you have to ask what it got them.

OK, it got them a fuckload of business as well as a market leader position in pretty much all the region however when you compare that to Apple – who spent just a little over US$14 million across the Asia region – you realise that while their cost/sales base is much, much higher, the focus is on a ‘brainwashing/creation-of-a-routine’ strategy rather than any desire to develop a brand people actively choose to associate with.

Is this such a bad thing?

No … but if you think they could maybe save themselves hundreds of millions of dollars on marketing expenditure by moving the brand into meaning something more than just the ‘condition-of-entry’ CLEAN AND HEALTHY TEETH, then I think it is something that should be at least explored.

Yes … yes … I know Apple and Colgate are dramatically different brands but – and maybe this is my HHCL side showing – I still believe Colgate could develop into something that has some sort of ‘badge value’ to consumers, despite…

1 Being a toothpaste

2 Being a product only the user knows they use – it is not something you can show the masses you use like an iPOD etc  [Then again, shampoo/perfume/lingerie brands have all faced this same problem and some have got around it very successfully]

As I said previously, for me it would be about developing a core [brand] idea that addresses cultural issues not just category ones … because it seems to me that Colgate’s amazing distribution and ad spend [as well as the quality of their product] is the driving force for their massive sales. [Though this is based purely on my personal perception]

Look I am not saying Colgate is a shit brand … I am just saying it is a brand that I believe could be much better.

Lets face it, NIKE make rubber soled shoes … Apple makes technology … Google pulls together information … and yet they have become some of the most well known AND desired brands in the World.

I have always been of the belief that it doesn’t matter what you produce or what category you operate in, there’s always the opportunity to be something that wins peoples hearts and minds as well as their wallets because [in my opinion] a true brand is when it is chosen regardless of competitive spend, heritage, evolution or distribution.

Please don’t think I’m saying advertising is the solution to every business problem because it plainly isn’t … product development, packaging, promotion, distribution [etc]  are all vital components – however when I see a brand that seems over-reliant on distribution and/or consumer routine/apathy, I can’t help but feel they’re not being as effective with their brand and/or marketing expenditure as they could be.

…please go here.

… because in a moment of stupidly, I deleted your email and I don’t know how to get back in contact as I only have your old RCKR address.  I am such a prick …