When I was in London, I went to Borough Market.
It had been years since I’d last visited, but the allure of TikTok videos saw me heading there early one Saturday morning.
I knew I was going to go a bit crazy with eating stuff – but in my defense – I live in NZ so I knew I wouldn’t be doing it very often.
When I arrived, I basically attacked it with military precision.
By precision, I mean I went straight in … sampling everything I had seen on the socials as well as anything that caught my eye.
And a lot caught my eye.
Breads.
Sausage Rolls.
Specialist sandwiches.
Fruit covered in chocolate.
Fancy pants pastries.
Doughnuts with exotic toppings.
You name it, I spent a fortune buying it, scoffing it and – if truth be told – being disappointed with it.
Not all, but most.
In fact, the best thing I ate was the easiest to make … the strawberries covered in chocolate.
Admittedly they were fucking good strawberries – and how can you go wrong with chocolate? – but even so, to have that as the tastiest thing I put in my mouth that day is pretty sad. That said, it does explain why that stall allegedly clears 20,000 quid profit a day.
A DAY!!!
[I know that sounds mad, but it came from a person in the know so don’t shoot the messenger]
What blew my mind was how packed it got …
People of all ages and places flocking to it like it was a new type of religion. Except instead of bringing bibles, they brought their cameras, smartphones and selfie sticks to flood their socials with more appetite illusion.
Me included, obvs.
Anyway, as I approached the whole experience like it was some sort of bizarre race, I was in and out within 2 hours … which is good, as I then proceeded to walk 29,000 steps to offset what I’d put in my mouth, but if it was based on taste rather than calories, I reckon I could have got away with about 40 steps.
Another reminder social media may wet the appetite, but its reality rarely satisfies.
